the Age issue

[saravrose]

this can relate to the forum but not necessarily. What is it about youth that makes others dismissive and hostile? I see this every day at both my jobs, at grocery stores and in ever public venue I find myself in some form. I don't think the young have changed. I think the treatment of them have. Example, At the bank. When using a calculator to balance my checkbook before making a withdrawal. I was told, 'Dear it's not your fault, nobody your age knows how to do math, they just weren't taught' You also hear phrases like, 'people your age never listen to anybody these days' and all kinds of various assumptions as to morality that I won't even delve into. My thought, do we as a collective whole of under thirty's deserve this? Is this something that my generation has given the world consistent justification for while I wasn't looking. Or is this just the everyday assumptions that every generation has gone through that you just have to 'age out' of. No hostility meant, just a vague curiosity. Was told once that certain generations are considered almost an indegenious subculture within the society they find themselves? some truth to that? just a thought....Sari.

[Cadwell]

:lol: I suspect older people have been saying "Youth of today :rolleyes: They're not like we were when we were kids" since time began. In precisely the same way as youth has always said "Dodery old fools, what do they know about anything?" :lol:

[elTwitcho]

What is it about youth that makes others dismissive

I do believe that being hostile is downright uncalled for (I'm a young person myself at 22) but the dissmissiveness may be related to the naivety (sp?) of youth that older and wiser members of our society have grown out of. Put simply, alot of us think we know everything before we have the opportunity to learn just how wrong that assumption is. Older people have been there, and eventually we'll be smiling knowlingly at the younger generation still fresh enough in the world to know everything.

That and it can't be overlooked that alot of people are genuinely disagreeable, to young people or otherwise.

[Jon, The Elder]

I'll be 67 in a month. Some of us (older folks) feel the same way about how we are responded to. I'm not as quick to respond to a given situation, but that doesn't make me slow. I'm not into the current street jargon - that doesn't make me ignorant. Indigenous sub-culture, sure, give me a bunch my own age and others would be lost. ITS ALL ABOUT TOLERANCE.

A large segment, large enough to be noticed, indulge in appearance-talk-mannerisms that accentuate their individualism. Unfortunately by trying so hard to 'not-fit-in' with established standards - the opposite is acheived.

Nothing has changed really - just don't run with the herd - be yourself and eventually people will come around to acceptance.

[JohnnyG]

I'll be 67 in a month. Some of us (older folks) feel the same way about how we are responded to. I'm not as quick to respond to a given situation, but that doesn't make me slow. I'm not into the current street jargon - that doesn't make me ignorant. Indigenous sub-culture, sure, give me a bunch my own age and others would be lost. ITS ALL ABOUT TOLERANCE.

A large segment, large enough to be noticed, indulge in appearance-talk-mannerisms that accentuate their individualism. Unfortunately by trying so hard to 'not-fit-in' with established standards - the opposite is acheived.

Nothing has changed really - just don't run with the herd - be yourself and eventually people will come around to acceptance.

Well said!;)

[kenyc]

t-t-t-t-t-t-t-talkin' 'bout my gen-er-a-tion.
- Pete Townsend

KAC

[MattyB]

in some aspects i think the 'older folks' way of dealing with youths depend on if they have kids of their own, and how well they know them..

i'm 19, and i (suppose) to some, i dress like a 'thug' (or the australian equivelent), and taking the train to school for many many years has taught me a fair few things.

i've had old ladies (60+) come sit next to me and talk to me about the weather or how my day has been, and i've had old ladies grip their bags tighter as i walk past.

how they percieve me would also depend on what 'class' they are, i mean.. a working class mother will know that kids in baggy pants are just kids. high class mothers who've raised private school, suit wearing business men might be inclined to jump to conclusions to the extent of fearing for their personal safety.

my mother always told me as a kid - "if you ever feel intimidated by other kids on the train, or if someone is hassling you, go sit next to a lady my age" - because if it were my mother, she'd open her mouth and even swing a bag or two to protect a kid she felt was being picked on. - mothers are alot more understanding - but again, depending on which class of mother. haha

i'm ranting here, and still haven't gotten to my point (if there is one)

now.. the question, what was it?

What is it about youth that makes others dismissive and hostile? - i think it's the fact that we/some CAN be rude, offensive and obnoxcious, and seeing a 18 year old on the news being locked up for stabbing another kid, or hearing about 16 year old bag snatchers - leads people to be extremly judgemental and prefer to look out for #1.

i don't think much has changed in that sence. although, alot has changed in the way of 13 year old girls having sex, or 15 year old kids getting addicted to drugs and snatching bags to get a hit - and teenagers being more disrespectful and (commonly) 'junkies' would make others be more hostile to them than they're grandmother would've been in the 1950's.

[MattyB]

sorry for my spelling, it's not my strong point.

[Andy_T]

Sari,

it's hard to judge for me without knowing your age.
'Under 30' might be 28 or 12 ... two things that might be a tad different.
Being 36 now (what I always considered *old* when I was 18 ) I see certain youthful habits that I don't completely agree with and that I would not have indulged in at 18 myself.

But I assume that's a most natural process, and I don't think that you get a significantly harder time now than either myself 18 years ago, or Setiprime and JohnnyG --- what? 50 years ago?

Best regards,
Andy

[Big_B]

Some people look down others for all sorts of reasons. Age is just an excuse.

[glenhead]

Sorry, Sari, but it happens to every generation, and every generation wonders why. There are a couple of contributing factors today that make it seem worse (IMHO) than it used to be. (FWIW, I'm 48, just to give generational context.)

There has been a huge shift over the last few decades to people speaking their minds, frequently with no consideration given to how it might affect the person to whom the statement is made. There is a seemingly pervasive attitude that it's OK to say absolutely anything to younger people, whether or not the younger person is known to the speaker. This used to be reserved for people who had truly "earned their stripes", people who had lived so long that they'd earned the right to say danged well what they want (and I can hardly wait to get to that age!) It's still not necessary to be condescending - you can speak your mind without being hurtful, and it takes age and seasoning to figure out how (I guess).

Today's youth is much freer with foul language than any preceding generation. Don't know why. The filth I hear from kids is appalling - the kind of stuff I use only in appropriate context (with my buddies, away from "decent folk"). Thirty years ago, the foul language was there, but it was kept within context - young people didn't walk through the mall or down the street spewing obsceneties in their public conversations. When an older person hears that coming from young people, it automatically labels them as uncouth louts, undeserving of any kind of respect. That attitude tends to bleed over to other young people, deserved or not.

It all comes down to respect. Many members of an older generation believe that less-seasoned members of society cannot have anything worthwhile to think or say, and many members of younger generations believe that their elders are out of touch and have no clue about the modern world. If everyone assumed that everyone else was worthy of respect (until they've proven themselves individually unworthy) the world would be less stressful for all ages.

When you figure out how to instill that level of respect in people, please let me know. Yeah, cynicism is a terrible thing. People are pigs. When someone is a pig with you - pity them, shake your head, ignore them, and move on. There'll come a magical time when you'll realize you haven't heard as much cr*p from your elders as you used to, and you'll have it made. That means you're now officially old.

[Streetshooter]

when I was younger, I didn't know nuttin....
now I'm 56 and I still don't know nuttin......

only thing I know for sure is that, I don't know nuttin....everybody tells me that all the time.....

[Tlee05]

Im one of the youths of today as im only 18,

I used to skate at local places all the time such as outside libarys and i always had older people going go and do some thing useful, Or telling the offices of me.
But on the other hand i have had alot of old people enjoy watching me skate.
I just believe some old people and young people are narrow minded moany horrible its not the age gap.
But the thing is when a few old people moan at you, you may go moany old ....., and when old people see a few youth's being rude or so on they will go youth of today!.

Its like if i got a attack by a black/asain/white person i could say all black/asain/white people mug etc.

So its labeling every kind. What i call narrow minded. The youth may have go worse but thats alot to do with the media showing it all now. Or again the media with gangster rap videos and youths want to be like them so they start becoming narrow minded and will act rudely.

[saravrose]

wonderful responses everyone. valid points from all sides. Here's a flip of the coin. My baby brother just stopped by.. with a brand new bright green tongue ring! My response to it. Well, he just accused me of not understanding how cool it is. He's right I have no idea how cool it is, don't want to and i would very much like to find a bribe to get him to remove it. Age is relative and I suppose the misconceptions and judgements happen on all sides. There are five short years between my tongue pierced brother and I. Yesterday I was too young, today i'm too old. Strange how that works. so, at almost twenty-three. I will be as respectful as my grandparents taught me to be. While waving the degree ahead of me before entering a room like a white flag. Has proven unaffective so far by the way, "what do you mean you just graduated. do you have any 'real' life experience". Smiling, holding onto my dignity, and praying the pantyhose are dark enough to cover the ankle tattoo.... Goodnight, Sari.

[PhotosGuy]

t-t-t-t-t-t-t-talkin' 'bout my gen-er-a-tion.
- Pete Townsend "I hope I die before I get old..." :D

[glenhead]

baby brother...brand new bright green tongue ring

Just remember the automatic prerogative of the elder sibling - you are fully sanctioned to give him unmitigated he!! for how he talks. My baby sister is 42, six years younger, and I still give her grief when she does boneheaded things (though it's far less common now, dang it!)

[Citizensmith]

sorry for my spelling, it's not my strong point.

See thats the problem with the youth of today, spelling. :)

Just kidding.

My big issue with the youth of today is just the ones who can beat me at computer games.

[cruzyn56]

Don't sweat it. Be glad you are not like them, vow to never become them and to never grow old. When these people you speak of were young they probably looked down on everyone around them, and still do. You just don't see or experience how they treat others.

[Claire]

I'm with those who said it's a common generation thing. The older generation will always think "god, the youth of today are so..." Heck, Im 26 and my friends and I were schocked with ourselves when we realised we had conversations on how "the kids of today" swear, start sex earlier, behave in class etc. Boy, did we feel old when having said those things! LOL It goes with the territory of growing up and maturing I think.

Some of the kids I've taughed made me sigh loudly or go nuts, but you know what? I think that even if they wear jeans that fall off them, caps in class, listen to mp3's in class, jump in and out of the window or try to be sexy like Britney Spears, majority will probably turn out fine in the end.

Still, yeah there are of course situations when one gets tired of being judged by one's age (old or young), skin colour, sex, religion or social-economical status. Try being a 20y/o black Muslim girl and you'll really feel the world is against you...

[MattyB]

Claire: i'm 19 and i'm disgusted the age kids are having sex these days, (heh.. "these days" *rolls eyes*).

i know that personally; when i have kids of my own, theres no way in hell i'm giving them as much freedom as i've had.