DON'T BE GENEROUS.. [Archive] - Canon Digital Photography Forums

saravrose

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 01:08

(rant warning).. Don't be generous with your gear.. that old adage of 'do for family'.. flush it down your toilet.... It's my gear, I bought it I use it I don't have the money to re-purchase... I've learned never again will anything go out of my camera bag for 'an afternoon'.. never again will a lens get loaned out so the cousin with the brand new rebel shooting in the green box can, 'see if she likes it'...
Okay, keeping it in perspective it's just one little 1G card... and she may not have completely lost it. It's somewhere between her house, her garage, her front yard, my front yard and my house.:evil: :evil: :evil: .. those dang things are the size of postage stamps...
Calming down.......... no. not really still pissed.. From now on whenever she needs advice or wants to make a purchase i'm sending her to the mall chain store with those used car salesman that sell all those promaster lenses...

sari

~sharon~

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 01:14

Oh dear not good ..I hope you find it

saravrose

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 01:20

welcome Sharon.. I'm normally very nice (ask everyone but Don;) ). unfortunately, the chances of her finding it are slim to non. I knew I was being stupid optomistic.. oh well. I'll go replace it in the morning...

Jon Foster

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 01:42

So tell us how you really feel. ;)

Jon.

tommykjensen

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 01:57

Better an empty 1 GB card than a lens ;-)

cdifoto

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 02:04

1 gig cards are ubercheap these days. I still won't lend squat to my family out of sight. Fortunately no one has any remote desire to use it anyways. I let my bro in law use my camera at Xmas and he said "Damn I can't even afford to hold this thing" when I answered his "How much did this set you back?" questions. :)

dewmuw

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 05:27

Once bitten twice shy - as they say.

I just lent my printer to my sister and she has given it back and said "It doesn't work". It did when it left the house! :(:(:(:(

theflyingkiwi

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 05:36

Sometimes you don't have a choice

<Start Rant>
You know sometimes family just don't understand what things can mean to others. My brother picked up my camera one day and just started using it. With out asking. Gee any one thought I had spent thousands just for him. I did give him an angry look and he hasn't done it again.
</End Rant>
:evil: :rolleyes: :D

Maureen Souza

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 05:45

I wish all I'd lost was a 1GB card, Sari....instead of a whole laptop computer, Wacom tablet and a gazillion extras for it :(:(:(

But I feel your pain;)

Curtis N

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 06:00

oh well. I'll go replace it in the morning...Why won't SHE replace it?

What am I missing here? If SHE lost it, SHE should replace it. Period, paragraph, end of story.....instead of a whole laptop computer, Wacom tablet and a gazillion extras for itHoly crap, Maureen! Sorry to hear about that!

Becca

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 06:57

Your rant is fully justified, Sari! If she doesn't offer to replace it, wrap up the receipt and give it to her for Christmas. ;)

GyRob

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 07:33

YES ITS VERY ANOYING.
I lent a carbon fiba trout rod to a friend when i packed fishing up a couple of yrs later i decided to sell all my fishing gear BUT could not rembember who i lent it too .
HE oveasly forgot who he borowed it from .
£150 lost :(
Rob.

Quad

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 10:18

Better an empty 1 GB card than a lens ;-)

Agreed a cheap lesson considering what could have been!
The cousin should not have to be asked to replace the card. You should have a 2 gig card in your hands already but since you don't just say no since you would rather not leave them with the responsibility of having to borrow your gear as your are really really anal about it. :) So you are doing them a favor really by refusing.

I am sure you will manage to keep the peace and also the gear. Family is fun though at times :lol: at least the nieces are fun from the sounds of it.

Maureen it sounds like a break in would be less of a haul. I hope they left the continent.

Ronald S. Jr.

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 10:25

spencer87

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 10:35

that sucks sari. i'd give her a day or 2 to look for it (if you dont need it right away) before you go out and replace it though.

i'm very wary of lending out my equipment. my sister wanted to borrow my rebel a while ago (before i bought my 20d and the rebel was my ONLY camera). She is my sister and I love her dearly, but after years of getting back stained shirts and scratched CD's, i know better than to lend her an expensive camera!

Maureen Souza

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 10:41

Agreed a cheap lesson considering what could have been!
The cousin should not have to be asked to replace the card. You should have a 2 gig card in your hands already but since you don't just say no since you would rather not leave them with the responsibility of having to borrow your gear as your are really really anal about it. :) So you are doing them a favor really by refusing.

I am sure you will manage to keep the peace and also the gear. Family is fun though at times :lol: at least the nieces are fun from the sounds of it.

Maureen it sounds like a break in would be less of a haul. I hope they left the continent.

Actually, it was us who left the continent...... we lost it in London, enroute to Italy.

saravrose

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 10:47

I'll ask her to replace it.. But she won't. and unfortunately this was a card that I bought awhile ago and it was fairly expensive.. I can just about guarantee that she will find the cheapest 1G card in the valley to replace it with (if she does).. But, it will be one of those.. I'll get that to you next friday.. and never does. and I know it was just a 1G card. I never agreed to let her borrow it in the first place.. we were shooting in the park and her card filled up and she asked if I had a spare, gave it to her and said that we could just download and I can give her a c.d. when I got to my house.. Apparently this huge t.v. in her living room will play a slide show of your pictures through a 1g card. So, she hussled me into letting her take it home... over a week later and an amost rude phone message I get my cheapo lens I had loaned her a couple of months back returned a couple of misc. items I'd told her I wanted back... an adaptor cord, portable dvd player etc.. but no dang memory card.. anyway, i'll let you know how it ends up.

sari

tommykjensen

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 10:56

saravrose

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 11:24

That definately sounds like someone You should never lend anything to again unless she leaves a deposit matching the value of the item.

I know if I lend something to my sister and she looses it or breaks it she will replace it. My brother thats an entirely different story.

eaxctly.. and it sucks to admit this but i'm one of those "I want everybody to be happy" kind of people and have a hard time being mean or saying no... she was always able to get her way anytime I was involved.. my twin and her kind of railroaded me from when we were kids.. now that were older she doesn't make me try to eat raw potatoes up on the roof anymore but she does have a way of talking real fast until I give in. be it let me borrow your credit card and i'll give you the cash on friday, or you don't mind taking my kids on your errands with you in the morning etc.. little stuff that I say yes to because its my general personality to be accomodating... there. that's my big personality flaw. I get taken advantage of... and I'll admit that it's partly my fault for not being more firm.. Fortunately I have some loyal friends who don't do the same stuff my siblings and cousin's get away with. and they tend to steer me around family situations that have potential disaster...

sari

Claire

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 12:28

That sucks Sari. Do tell her to replace it. It should been offered already by her, but if not - tell her.

Maureen, how did you guys lose all that stuff??

lmelendez

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 12:32

I remember last year, when CF's were super expensive still, and I had just bought two 2gig Ultra II's, and each one ran about $250. I lent one to my dad, and he lost it immediately. I said "well, you'll have to make that up to me". Almost a year later, he hasn't, and now they're like 80 bucks. I still think he owes me $250. :-(

I was thinking about the exception to the rule.... and I was going to say... it is my parents. They are the only ones I don't have the face to ask for a cent back.

Why?

Well, no server will be powerful enough to store the list of things they have done for me... without asking a cent in return.

Cousins, friends, brother/sisters, etc.... yeap... send the receipt...

Leo.

Bruce Hamilton

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 12:57

I lent my ex girlfriend my 300D last fall for a week, when she went to Tennesee to see her youngest grandchild. It returned in mint condition, as she promised it would, but I was still sweating bullets all week.

liza

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 13:17

Some people are just clueless. You should email her a link to this thread.

Ronald S. Jr.

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 13:34

I was thinking about the exception to the rule.... and I was going to say... it is my parents. They are the only ones I don't have the face to ask for a cent back.

If it were my mother, I wouldn't ask for it back. She'd pay me back anyway, though, because she knew I worked hard to make the money to pay for that card. In all seriousness, my dad hasn't done too much for me, or been even very "dad-like" since I was about 10. Even when I was a kid, I never saw him much. He and my "real" mother had a terrible relationship. By the way, when I say "mother", I'm talking about my stepmother. She's way more of a mother than my mother ever was. Anyway, my dad. He's never provided for me, never given me a dime (unless it was mom's money), or much of anything there.

So...if he breaks/loses something of mine, he's paying me back, and I expect every cent. :-)

Rumjungle

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 14:51

I'm sorry to hear this, Sari. Unfortunately, this sounds like one of those rare occasions where being a "nice person" gets you trampled on.:confused:

Perhaps you, or one of your friends, could stop by your cousin's house and "borrow" that rebel (and the card inside it) until she coughs up a suitable replacement CF card. That should give your cousin enough motivation to get off her butt and make things right.:evil:

lmelendez

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 15:00

If it were my mother, I wouldn't ask for it back. She'd pay me back anyway, though, because she knew I worked hard to make the money to pay for that card. In all seriousness, my dad hasn't done too much for me, or been even very "dad-like" since I was about 10. Even when I was a kid, I never saw him much. He and my "real" mother had a terrible relationship. By the way, when I say "mother", I'm talking about my stepmother. She's way more of a mother than my mother ever was. Anyway, my dad. He's never provided for me, never given me a dime (unless it was mom's money), or much of anything there.

So...if he breaks/loses something of mine, he's paying me back, and I expect every cent. :-)

Good Point! All parents are different. I know I am very lucky with the ones I have and I'm hoping someday my daughters will say the same... I guess my point was that there are exceptions to the rule....

Leo.

Saralonde

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 17:00

I'm sorry for you, Sari. I understand how you feel. I do not loan my stuff out after a bad experience. Same as Damien, I was told it "didn't work" when it was returned when it darn well did when I lent it. I'm generally a person who cannot say no, so now I say, "Oh, gee, sorry, but I'll be using it" even if it is obvious I won't. Only exceptions are my husband (who will replace it) and daughter who is becoming very interested in photography but can't afford her own yet.
Maureen: so sorry about your lost laptop! I hope the rest of your trip was so full of wonderful memories that this won't be a standout memory.

ANali

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 17:17

I'm sorry this happened to you Sari!

My family is afraid to ask to use any of my camera equipment after how pissed I was when my BIL borrowed my camera and gave it back to me STICKY (OK - it was my film SLR and not my digital, but this was years ago before the 300D had even come out, so it was my primary camera!). So try my solution - completely blow up and maybe they will remember it for years and years and never ask to use your stuff again!

Good luck on getting your card replaced.

Andrea

Jamie Holladay

22nd of June 2006 (Thu), 17:27

I agree don't let know one borrow nothing. I did some work for my family, it was my Grandmother's 90th birthday and would not even let my mother push the button on the camera for the Grandchildren's shot - I used the timer.

Jamie

20DNewbie

23rd of June 2006 (Fri), 07:02

that's my big personality flaw
sari
Sari I don't think it's a flaw to be a nice person, I think your cousin is the one with the flaw.

The card should have been replaced, it's that simple.

I'm not sure if you saw my rant about a "Pro" I knew wanting to borrow my 50 1.4, long story short, it came back with a big ol' honkin smudge on the rear element and the CP looked as if she had licked it. :confused:

Three weeks later she was called to the office and laid off the job she had for 4 years as a dept. head. She thought she was going in for a promotion that had been quietly put in the works for her.

Karma, she'll get ya every time.

catsith

23rd of June 2006 (Fri), 20:07

my rule of thumb for me is, if I can't afford to replace it if I break/lose it, DON'T borow it! Should be the same rule for lending too.

sageone

23rd of June 2006 (Fri), 20:22

cdifoto

23rd of June 2006 (Fri), 20:46

Me Don? Or another Don?

Me Don. :p

Lightstream

24th of June 2006 (Sat), 06:44

Sorry to hear about your loss Sari. It really, really sucks to be nice and be repaid with a slap in the face. Been there, done it.

I have a simple rule: I only lend my gear to other Canon EOS shooters who have been verified to take good care of their own gear ;) because they know the system, they know the respect it has to be treated with.

Basically - this little rule limits it to just ONE guy I know who has always taken care of my stuff. He used to shoot a Rebel 1000F all those years ago and I borrowed it. Sent it back in excellent condition, even put in a new 2CR5 lithium for him and let him keep it. He can shoot my 350D any time he wants. :)

My other friends are all WAY too intimidated by the DSLRs and their controls to handle my gear :mrgreen: good.. keep it that way.

::John::

24th of June 2006 (Sat), 07:09

Sometimes people just don't follow the same 'rules' when it comes to lending or borrowing. This was sad reading, Sari.

I have an ex-girlfriend somewhere in the world who has my 35mm Pentax

My stepson rocked up here one day and wanted to borrow a camera for the weekend. I dragged out the old Sony Mavica (the .3Mpixel one that saves to diskettes) and he suddenly didn't need a camera any more.

There is only one person I would happily lend any of my gear to because I just know he will get it back promptly or replace it if it gets damaged - and I believe it works in reverse - but there is a difference - he is not 'family'. 'Family' have a habit of making people feel guilty when they say no.

Sari, I hope she either finds it or replaces it.

ron chappel

25th of June 2006 (Sun), 00:52

I wish all I'd lost was a 1GB card, Sari....instead of a whole laptop computer, Wacom tablet and a gazillion extras for it :(:(:(

:cry: :cry: It's moments like these that one wishes the laptop was running windows 9x as a form of revenge ;)

Thompsunshine

25th of June 2006 (Sun), 05:18

I don't borrow anythiing that I cannot afford to replace. Having said that, if someone wants to "borrow a lens", send them to a reputable store and tell them that if they buy the lens and don't like it, most reputable places have a 14 day return policy.

No one asks to borrow my equipment. My general opinion is if they have to "borrow" then they can't afford to buy, so the answer would be no.

NYC2BGI

25th of June 2006 (Sun), 06:57

I was recently asked by a guy that I know to borrow one of my cameras. This is the same guy that took forever to pay back $5.00 so of course the answer was no. I have a policy that I don't lend my car or camera gear out. Those 2 things are off limits.

Becca

25th of June 2006 (Sun), 09:20

One thing my mom always said was to never lend something that you expected to get back. Sounds silly, but it makes you think about lending something before you do it, and you're not disappointed when you don't get it back. So, under those rules, I would never lend my camera gear. Clothes? Sure! Money? When I can afford it. My camera? No way!

Jaymz

25th of June 2006 (Sun), 10:45

I generally don't loan things out because of 'friends or relatives' like this. I have lost many items from loaning them out.

But I have one friend, I will loan anything to him. He is the type of person who if he loses or breaks something, he replaces it with the exact same thing or better.

jbkalla

25th of June 2006 (Sun), 12:12

...But I have one friend, I will loan anything to him. He is the type of person who if he loses or breaks something, he replaces it with the exact same thing or better.

That's a good friend to have! I do the same thing, but I haven't found a lot of people like that... I guess people don't value things the same way.

queenbee288

26th of June 2006 (Mon), 13:47

Loan out my equipment???? I don't even let anyone hold it.:lol:

saravrose

26th of June 2006 (Mon), 17:23

Okay y'all update.. she has found my 1G card today, in her garage peeking out from underneath her dog food. She promises it was in it's little case so I'm hoping it's okay... In any regard we all live and learn, I have definately taught myself a lesson. Regardless of the person and no matter how small the favor nobody will ever touch any of my gear again.. be it a flash, a CF card, lens or body... i'm done. that's all she wrote, what's mine stays with me.

cdifoto

26th of June 2006 (Mon), 17:31

saravrose

26th of June 2006 (Mon), 18:20

5 bucks says you're too soft to stand up for yourself like that. :)

thanks Don.

bikerider

26th of June 2006 (Mon), 20:05

My family are too scared to borrow anything from me, they know the consequences of losing or damaging anything! I don't mean violence either, I just make them pay in cash. My son made that mistake and it cost him $2000. Ya gotta have respect!
Roger.

Lightstream

27th of June 2006 (Tue), 07:18

You break it, you bought it.. fair enough!

I would fully expect to be asked to make good on something if it went missing or got damaged in my hands, unless otherwise forgiven (and I don't count on it). I think about that before I borrow something. That's the other reason I prefer to own my own gear, so if anything happens, I only have myself to scream at (and I do a DAMN good job at that unfortunately :( )