I need pity (vent)

[Mum2J&M]

I don't know how many of you stay at home with your kids, but I'm about ready to dive off the nearest cliff if you know what I mean (not seriously, just a figure of speech!). My oldest is 4 and my youngest is 2 and 1/2. My youngest nearly bit off his entire tongue last night after being hit by his older brother. The blood was literally gushing out of his mouth. He didn't stop crying the entire night. So he didn't go to school today - and neither did his brother. I am still amazed at how hard doing this is. For anyone who thinks this job is easy, or that it involves doing nothing, you are dead wrong. I used to think that. I was a workaholic for 20 years before this gig and let me tell you, that was a cake walk compared to this. WTH?!!! How do people do it with more than 2 kids? It's seriously like solitary confinement and torture sometimes. Whining, crying, hitting, screaming, asking stupid questions, never picking up, spilling, potty training messes, wanting entertainment 24/7. Then to try to have any kind of relationship with my husband with all this going on?! I just don't understand why this is such a misunderstood vocation. Maid, police officer, psychiatrist, nurse, personal shopper, chef, driver, and the list just goes on and on and on. I know this isn't really the place to be discussing this, but in some twisted way I think this has a lot to do with why I like photography. It allows me to get away to an extent even if I am photographing the kids. It's like a distraction that takes me away from it all. I never thought I'd say this, but I can't wait to go back to work! :rolleyes:

[Mom27andblessed]

Sorry you are having a tough time of it lately. I've been there...several times over. And tho I wouldn't trade beinga SAHM for most of my adult life (I did hold a very nice office job for a few years when my then youngest started school...before my last 2 came along) it IS the toughest job.

Just know that it all flies by SO very quickly. I swear I was just yesterday rocking my firstborn while she battled teething and bronchitis...now she is 26 and has 3 of her own.

TOO FAST!

Breathe...in and out...and hug them close while they let you!

[cosworth]

The pains you experience now will be pleasantly turned into "gains" when you have successful children and are blessed with grandchildren.

If it was all sunshine everyone would be doing it! You have to have a cloudy day to appreciate a sunny day to the fullest.

[Mum2J&M]

I'm worried I hug them too much. I am so emotionally involved, I have little room for myself. It's tough when your youngest is in speech therapy too. He understands everything we say, but gets very frustrated when he can't communicate with us verbally. It gets hard for us too. And having 2 definitely makes having 1 seem like having none. I heard some man say this on that baby show on cable once and it really hit the nail right on the head!

[Mum2J&M]

The pains you experience now will be pleasantly turned into "gains" when you have successful children and are blessed with grandchildren.

If it was all sunshine everyone would be doing it! You have to have a cloudy day to appreciate a sunny day to the fullest.

Yes, I suppose this is correct. It's really just tough to look at things that way when you're in the midst of it. There certainly have already been many ups and downs...

[HarleyQuinn]

Oh honey, I feel ya.

I've got 7 yr old twin boys and a 6 yr old girl. I had 3 in diapers at once!

It's hard, unrecognized work. There were quite a few times I had to lock myself in the bathroom and just cry my eyes out. Everyone tells me it will get better, so I'll say the same to you. :D


For the time though, try the crying in the bathroom trick, sometimes it's all you need.

((((((BIG HUGS))))))

[shannyD]

i know how you feel.
i have a two year old and a 5 year old. they are partners in crime, but they love getting hurt.
my 5 year old is like the guys from the mtv show jack A$$. he tried riding a razor scooter down the slide at the park. he jumped off a marry go round while it was going full speed.
then to top it off my two year old like to try and follow in his footsteps.
my oldest has never had to be put in the hospital for anything, but my two year old has a habit of finding himself in the er more times than not.
the latest was two days after gramma picked the boys up to hang out with her for a month. he went behind the swing while big brother was on it, and got clobbered by the swing, and got his cheek glued back together.
they are always playing really rough with each other. and luckily.... people around me are great with looking at blood because im useless the second i even see blood.
i know what your going through. just take it easy. i too am a stay at home mother, and it never feels like it gets any easier, but in a couple years well be pros at this. and be able to give other mothers advice.
shannon

[cosworth]

I've changed a lot of diapers in my day. Large adult diapers as well. More diapers than any man on this site I bet. I've been there. I raised my sister and stepchildren, worked with handicapped children for 10 years.... You gotta hang in and always find the positives in the day. If you can't you are in trouble.

We all know how an ugly day with chaos can become one of the most memorable in 10 seconds with a child around.

Some days you just have to leave the house and go to the park to blow off some steam and get away from the grind. Money can be tight, but a couple hours with a sitter/daycare and a little spa treatment or a movie ALONE can go sooooo far for a recharge.

[shannyD]

I've changed a lot of diapers in my day. Large adult diapers as well. More diapers than any man on this site I bet. I've been there. I raised my sister and stepchildren, worked with handicapped children for 10 years.... You gotta hang in and always find the positives in the day. If you can't you are in trouble.

We all know how an ugly day with chaos can become one of the most memorable in 10 seconds with a child around.

Some days you just have to leave the house and go to the park to blow off some steam and get away from the grind. Money can be tight, but a couple hours with a sitter/daycare and a little spa treatment or a movie ALONE can go sooooo far for a recharge.


i second this. when things get out of control i go get my hair done, and spend some time at the book store. i love my little monsters. they crack me up.. no matter how evil they can be. they are so much fun sometimes// but other times you just need a couple hours to yourself.

[Mum2J&M]

LOL Lucy. Been there done that too. It does seem like a mind game. Talk about monotonous. I think I have more meltdowns than they do. ;)

[david_usmarine]

the hard days are hard for a reason they help you enjoy the great days even more.....
you'll close your eyes blinking and they will be all grown up........hold on to it while you can and always pray :)

[shannyD]

the hard days are hard for a reason they help you enjoy the great days even more.....
you'll close your eyes blinking and they will be all grown up........hold on to it while you can and always pray :)


that just hit home. i fee like it was not too long ago when i had my boys. and i feel like its all going by so fast. i feel like tomorrow ill bbe waking up, and they will be shipping off to college.

[Mum2J&M]

I've changed a lot of diapers in my day. Large adult diapers as well. More diapers than any man on this site I bet. I've been there. I raised my sister and stepchildren, worked with handicapped children for 10 years.... You gotta hang in and always find the positives in the day. If you can't you are in trouble.

We all know how an ugly day with chaos can become one of the most memorable in 10 seconds with a child around.

Some days you just have to leave the house and go to the park to blow off some steam and get away from the grind. Money can be tight, but a couple hours with a sitter/daycare and a little spa treatment or a movie ALONE can go sooooo far for a recharge.

It's refreshing to hear a male talk about this stuff. I know it's not limited to females. It can make anyone nuts. Don't get me wrong, there are great times. But when you're in the thick of it, sometimes you just need to let off some steam. Thanks for listening to my gripe. I'm sure you all have your own things going on too.

[JimAskew]

My wife and I are both 63 years old and we are the primary caregivers for our 3 year old grandaughter and 5 year old grandson. If I have learned one thing in the past year its I now understand why God gives us children when we are young :D At the end of the day we are both exhusted!

But the rewards are there...just look for them. The other day my grandson crawled up in my lap and then calmly informed me "Grandpa, your hair is white, and Grandpa, so are your eyebrows!" My wife and I laughed for 1/2 an hour. Then there is the grandaughter...she comes up to me, slaps me upside my head with a book, and says "Read me, Grandpa, read me!" I just love it.

They fight like cats and dogs, they destroy my family room every day, and best of all they keep us both young. I am just glad we are able to do this for our daughter. We wouldn't exchange this experience for anything.

As I said, the rewards are there...just look for them :D

[Mum2J&M]

Lol Jim. I'm 39 now. So I wish I'd started younger. But I didn't meet my husband until I was 32, so go figure. You just have to have the patience of a saint.

[HarleyQuinn]

Wow Jim, that me feel alot better! My parents can't even spend 30 minutes alone with the kids before they go insane. My Dad once made one of my sons "change his own diaper", of course he was on the verge of potty training. ;)

You and your wife are an inspiration to me!

[JimAskew]

Lol Jim. I'm 39 now. So I wish I'd started younger. But I didn't meet my husband until I was 32, so go figure. You just have to have the patience of a saint.

Wow Jim, that me feel alot better! My parents can't even spend 30 minutes alone with the kids before they go insane. My Dad once made one of my sons "change his own diaper", of course he was on the verge of potty training. ;)

You and your wife are an inspiration to me!

Mum and Lucy,

Thank you both. I have often said that grandkids are God's reward for living a good life.

BTW, did I mention that both are redheads? We get extra points for this ;)

[ibdb]

I have three sons -- 8, 5, and 19 months. I've been a stay-at-home Dad for the last six years.

The kids have always gone to a preschool/daycare for a couple of days each week to allow me some time to get anything done that requires uninterrupted time. It's also allowed me to do some of my other jobs -- classroom volunteer, sports coach, community volunteer, Webmaster and VP of a local PTA like organization, etc.

There are plenty of people who wonder how I can do it. There are days that certainly make you wonder. But there are more than enough smiles, hugs, and heartfelt thank you's to last for years to come, and make me wonder how anyone could not do it. :D

[LeesaB]

the lowest paid and appreicated profession in the world..a stay at home mom

But you hang in there because one day it will be So worth the time effort and frustration...

THEN. you get to be like me..stuck home babysitting your grandkids..LOL and I'm not much older then YOU...

[ibdb]

And one quick story that keeps me going, no matter how long the day has gone.

While working in my oldest's first grade classroom, one of the boys in the class came up to me and very quietly told me that he thought my son was the luckiest kid he knew. When I asked him why, he said "because he lives with you, and because you come to his class to help." He then turned and went back to his desk.

I remained where I sat, trying very hard to maintain my composure, and feeling like I was something much greater than I could ever have imagined.

[LeesaB]

What a great story...

[wardie]

Mum2J&M. - Hang in the darling. :D:D

As everybody has said there are diamonds in amongst all this crud. In a short while things will sort themselves out as the boys work out their space and how to relate. One day you will suddenly realise that everything has reached a point of calm (it's all relative I know but that point will be reached)

I'm 47 and a semi stay-at-home dad (I work nights) for my now two year old and also have a 9 year old autistic daughter who has issues understanding how her sister communicates so I have been exasperated to the point where I've had to walk the beach prior to starting work so I don't take things out on my customers. I've realised now that their relationship is a lot calmer and more loving as they both learn each other space.

You'll get there but don't be afraid to ask for help from friends/family/professionals if need be.


Wardie

[RikWriter]

I've been a stay at home dad with our two kids for almost ten years...the oldest is ten, the youngest six. It's been hard, but it's also been the most rewarding experience I could ever imagine.

[Mum2J&M]

Thanks you guys. This has helped me feel much better. I do appreciate your support. For some reason, I really needed it tonight. ;)

[HarleyQuinn]

I have to say, I'm really impressed with the Stay at home Dads on here. It wasn't that long ago that a man would NEVER think about doing that! !GASP!

Many kudos to you guys who have the patience and love for your wives to do that.

[Grace]

I don't know how many of you stay at home with your kids, but I'm about ready to dive off the nearest cliff if you know what I mean (not seriously, just a figure of speech!). My oldest is 4 and my youngest is 2 and 1/2. My youngest nearly bit off his entire tongue last night after being hit by his older brother. The blood was literally gushing out of his mouth. He didn't stop crying the entire night. So he didn't go to school today - and neither did his brother. I am still amazed at how hard doing this is. For anyone who thinks this job is easy, or that it involves doing nothing, you are dead wrong. I used to think that. I was a workaholic for 20 years before this gig and let me tell you, that was a cake walk compared to this. WTH?!!! How do people do it with more than 2 kids? It's seriously like solitary confinement and torture sometimes. Whining, crying, hitting, screaming, asking stupid questions, never picking up, spilling, potty training messes, wanting entertainment 24/7. Then to try to have any kind of relationship with my husband with all this going on?! I just don't understand why this is such a misunderstood vocation. Maid, police officer, psychiatrist, nurse, personal shopper, chef, driver, and the list just goes on and on and on. I know this isn't really the place to be discussing this, but in some twisted way I think this has a lot to do with why I like photography. It allows me to get away to an extent even if I am photographing the kids. It's like a distraction that takes me away from it all. I never thought I'd say this, but I can't wait to go back to work! :rolleyes:


I feel you! I certainly do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 my boys are 4 and 2 as well -

I know you know some days are better than others...and this just happens to be a hard day. hang in there - there are tons of us out there that completely sympathize!

go get a manicure :)

[Azzure_7]

Mum and Lucy,

Thank you both. I have often said that grandkids are God's reward for living a good life.

BTW, did I mention that both are redheads? We get extra points for this ;)

I don't look at kids' photo at all ussually. But I got stuck for a minute when I saw this. Oh how wonderfull they are being nice to each other. Not fighting or arguing, coz that's what I did when I was at that age. LOL. Now, I can't imagine how my parent's manged 4 kids lol.

I was the youngest. Oh yah the funny thing is that my parent's told me that my sister and I were both manufactured accidentally. lol.. .. Just thought it's funny.

[SuzyView]

I just found this. I have to admit, I was where you are many times and continue to wonder why I have 4 sons some days. But I come from a different angle.

My parents raised 8 children, 7 girls, 1 boy, and we are Chinese. My brother is #7 and I'm #8. I was pretty spoiled, but I had older parents. They were tired when they got to me, so I got away with murder and got whatever I wanted, even though we were very poor.

I graduated with a degree in family studies so I thought I was prepared to raise kids. Was I wrong? I did, however, have a plan. My husband and I made some decisions about raising our kids, not letting them raise us. That has made all the difference. When you have a plan in place for the important things, you have a direction to lead the children. Mind, each child is different, but it's okay to have dreams for them, within reason. I believe in wings. Give your kids the tools, emotional, psychological, spiritual, etc. to build up wings. By the time they are 11, they are pretty much wanting to fly. Hold onto them until they are 18 or so, when they have the know how to fly, you'll do just fine. I have sent 2 sons off to college and have 2 little elementary ones at home still. There are times when I wish I could give them away or lock them out of the house, they are so noisy, but then, they are the most important, and precious gifts I have ever received. And the whole reason why I went into photography. Cherish them while they are young, they grow up so quickly. And have a great Wednesday tomorrow!

[deadpass]

this is why I'm not a breeder.

[rklepper]

Not sure how much it helps when you are feeling this way, but what you are doing is also the most important job in the world. I think a couple of important ones that you left off of the list are teacher, motivator, confidant (ok maybe they are too little for this yes, but yes). You will never regret doing this job and doing it well.

It is, as you say, also the most difficult and misunderstood job in the world. As me Mum used to say "Keep a stiff upper lip." In other words keep on doing what you do well and it will calm down eventualy.

I don't know how many of you stay at home with your kids, but I'm about ready to dive off the nearest cliff if you know what I mean (not seriously, just a figure of speech!). My oldest is 4 and my youngest is 2 and 1/2. My youngest nearly bit off his entire tongue last night after being hit by his older brother. The blood was literally gushing out of his mouth. He didn't stop crying the entire night. So he didn't go to school today - and neither did his brother. I am still amazed at how hard doing this is. For anyone who thinks this job is easy, or that it involves doing nothing, you are dead wrong. I used to think that. I was a workaholic for 20 years before this gig and let me tell you, that was a cake walk compared to this. WTH?!!! How do people do it with more than 2 kids? It's seriously like solitary confinement and torture sometimes. Whining, crying, hitting, screaming, asking stupid questions, never picking up, spilling, potty training messes, wanting entertainment 24/7. Then to try to have any kind of relationship with my husband with all this going on?! I just don't understand why this is such a misunderstood vocation. Maid, police officer, psychiatrist, nurse, personal shopper, chef, driver, and the list just goes on and on and on. I know this isn't really the place to be discussing this, but in some twisted way I think this has a lot to do with why I like photography. It allows me to get away to an extent even if I am photographing the kids. It's like a distraction that takes me away from it all. I never thought I'd say this, but I can't wait to go back to work! :rolleyes:

[Karl C]

Mum2J&M. - Hang in the darling. :D:D

As everybody has said there are diamonds in amongst all this crud. In a short while things will sort themselves out as the boys work out their space and how to relate. One day you will suddenly realise that everything has reached a point of calm (it's all relative I know but that point will be reached)

I'm 47 and a semi stay-at-home dad (I work nights) for my now two year old and also have a 9 year old autistic daughter who has issues understanding how her sister communicates so I have been exasperated to the point where I've had to walk the beach prior to starting work so I don't take things out on my customers. I've realised now that their relationship is a lot calmer and more loving as they both learn each other space.

You'll get there but don't be afraid to ask for help from friends/family/professionals if need be.


Wardie

I'm truly sorry your 9-year old is dealing with autism. My ex-girlfriend's brother has an autistic child and it sometimes is heartbreaking to watch his kid deal with the autism. He's only 4 too.

You're the second guy I've encountered who had kids later in life. I'm almost 42 and still single. For a long time, kids didn't even rate consideration. Then, for about five years in my 30's, I wanted kids. Then, all of a sudden, it changed again. I was talking with my ex-girlfriend tonight and one of the topics was kids. Given all that has occurred in my life recently, I feel like I'm missing something and that if I wait any longer, I won't have the opportunity to have kids. The main reason I haven't had kids yet is I'm flat-out scared! Also, I don't want them to go through what I've been through growing up; I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. So, I'm trying to sort it out and determine what I need and want to do. It's agonizing. I'm scared I'm making a huge mistake being childless up to this point. Man, I need a drink.

Anyway, to the OP, hang in there. I can only imagine what you're experiencing.

Good luck.

[wardie]

Karl C - Thanks for the thoughts, we are OK though as Brie (see my avatar) is only mildly asperger autistic. She mainly struggles with understanding people as her outlook is black and white, it's either is or isn't so sarcasm, spite and sometimes humour is confusing to her. There are kids in her class who are severely troubled by it and it's their parents who I have respect for.

deadpass - I struggle sometime to understand why posts like yours are of benefit.

Wardie

[Azzure_7]

I just found this. I have to admit, I was where you are many times and continue to wonder why I have 4 sons some days. But I come from a different angle.

My parents raised 8 children, 7 girls, 1 boy, and we are Chinese. My brother is #7 and I'm #8. I was pretty spoiled, but I had older parents. They were tired when they got to me, so I got away with murder and got whatever I wanted, even though we were very poor.

I graduated with a degree in family studies so I thought I was prepared to raise kids. Was I wrong? I did, however, have a plan. My husband and I made some decisions about raising our kids, not letting them raise us. That has made all the difference. When you have a plan in place for the important things, you have a direction to lead the children. Mind, each child is different, but it's okay to have dreams for them, within reason. I believe in wings. Give your kids the tools, emotional, psychological, spiritual, etc. to build up wings. By the time they are 11, they are pretty much wanting to fly. Hold onto them until they are 18 or so, when they have the know how to fly, you'll do just fine. I have sent 2 sons off to college and have 2 little elementary ones at home still. There are times when I wish I could give them away or lock them out of the house, they are so noisy, but then, they are the most important, and precious gifts I have ever received. And the whole reason why I went into photography. Cherish them while they are young, they grow up so quickly. And have a great Wednesday tomorrow!

I beat you...
My father was the 11th. can easily form a football team. still my grandfather adopt another one which don't make my father the youngest one lol.

[camom]

Hey Mum2J&M

I hope you're feeling better. It is VERY hard what you're doing. Hang in there. Sometimes you just have to take it one day at a time.

I have 2 boys, now ages 7 & 6. Both of my boys were in speech therapy - one started at 30mos the other at 18mos. It's very hard and you worry but the fact that your son is receiving ST shows that you are a good mom. :mrgreen:

Good luck to you.

[JimAskew]

... deadpass - I struggle sometime to understand why posts like yours are of benefit.

Wardie

I could not agree more!

[Mom27andblessed]

Karl C - Thanks for the thoughts, we are OK though as Brie (see my avatar) is only mildly asperger autistic. She mainly struggles with understanding people as her outlook is black and white, it's either is or isn't so sarcasm, spite and sometimes humour is confusing to her. There are kids in her class who are severely troubled by it and it's their parents who I have respect for.

deadpass - I struggle sometime to understand why posts like yours are of benefit.

Wardie


You are so right. My 6 year old with Down syndrome had a very bad seizure disorder when he was very small that almost took him from us. It left him severely impaired both mentally and physically (things he had been doing before the seizures still haven't returned) and he is completely non verbal. I often see kids staring, once in a restaraunt, 2 girls got out of their seat to stand in the aisle to gawk.
Their parents are lacking and so it is passed down to the children. My other children (YES! I'm a MASTER BREEDER!) know compassion, empathy and all the JOYS of having a disabled sibling. They actually seek out others with DS and we have made many friends this way.

Anyway...just wanted to agree with your entire post. God bless!

[20droger]

One thought to help maintain sanity....

Children bring extreme joy twice in their lives: the day they are born, and the day they get the hell out. Between those two times, their primary task is to drive their parents insane.

[SuzyView]

One thought to help maintain sanity....

Children bring extreme joy twice in their lives: the day they are born, and the day they get the hell out. Between those two times, their primary task is to drive their parents insane.

LOL. It isn't that bad. My 10 year old came up to me on the couch today and hugged me for about 2 minutes. He said, "I love you, Mom. I'm the luckiest kid in the world."

My reply, "I love you, too. Okay, what do you want?"
:lol::rolleyes:

[Mum2J&M]

LOL. It isn't that bad. My 10 year old came up to me on the couch today and hugged me for about 2 minutes. He said, "I love you, Mom. I'm the luckiest kid in the world."

My reply, "I love you, too. Okay, what do you want?"
:lol::rolleyes:

My son has already done this!

[::John::]

It sounds frustrating and it really knocks you around - but hang in there. The rewards will come - and they can't be replaced with any other feeling of completeness.

Through an unfortunate set of circumstances, I missed out on all of the above and it's only been later in life that my children have sought my company. They, and their children, are bringing me a joy that I can taste - but I know, inside, that I missed a very important stage in their life.

My hat is off to all parents bringing up children.

[20droger]

Bill Cosby once said:

When we got married, my wife and I looked at each other and said, "Let's have a baby!"

So we had a baby.

A little later, while the baby was still a baby, we looked at each other and said, "Let's have another baby!"

So we had another baby.

Trust me when I say that not once did we ever look at each other and say, "Let's have a couple of teenagers!"

[Mum2J&M]

I adore Bill Cosby. Saw him once at UMass-Amherst while covering a news story for UMass-Boston.

[gymell]

I don't necessarily think that most people believe raising kids is easy. I don't have kids myself, and am the same age as you are, and I have never thought it would be easy. That's why I don't have them and don't plan to. I have neighbors on both sides who have very cute little 3 and 4 year olds, but I can't imagine having to take care of them 24/7! It's not for everyone.

[Mum2J&M]

Actually, Liz, I was amazed I had them and have come this far. I was adopted and was an only child. So all of this sibling rival stuff is new to me. I think the thing that's different from what I'd imagined before having them is how emotionally attached I am. I was never a good babysitter and always feared having mine own children - because of that and childbirth, lol. Anyway, it's definitely taught me a lot. I'm not as nervous about the "boo-boos" now that I've been through having two of them, but when the crying child is your own, it's an entirely new ball game. It's instinctive. Very hard to explain. My cousin didn't and won't have any children. Neither has or will my step-brother. Nothing wrong with it. Also nothing wrong with having one or whatever. My MIL told me it wouldn't be "fair" to my oldest if I didn't have another. I gently reminded her that I was an "only" and turned out okay (well, pretty much anyway). Kids are hard work. I wasn't naive. I knew it would be hard work. It's just a different kind than I'd imagined I guess. None of my office job bosses screamed for food or pulled at my heart strings. Sometimes it's like working in an insane asylum.

[cylentka]

I only have one child and I honestly say that I don't understand how people cope when they have more than one! With just one I often had to shut myself in the bathroom as a sort of "time out for mom", just to regain my composure. The good thing was that I usually ended up laughing at myself and that helped me get through the day. My kid is 6 now and life is easier, but there were a few years there where I was climbing the wall fairly regularly. I think you are right, it is the HARDEST job in the world! Hang in there with your two. Sometimes it helps to read a parenting book on the age group your kids are in. That always helped me to put my kid's behavior in perspective (i.e. they ALL do it), and it drives home the point that they outgrow whatever it is that is driving you nuts. Of course, they grow into something else that also drives you nuts, but it does get easier as they get older and you can at least communicate and reason with them somewhat. (um, until they hit about 13...) :confused:

[Mum2J&M]

Well, with two, one grows out of the stage just in time for the other to grow into it, lol. And there is always a "next" stage. I guess that's part of the maddening part. You just get through one and it's onto the next.

[gymell]

Actually, Liz, I was amazed I had them and have come this far. I was adopted and was an only child.
...


Well I'm sure that it's normal to find the learning curve difficult. I'm sure I would. I'm the oldest of 4, with three younger brothers, so I got plenty of babysitting practice in when I was a kid. Funny, my mom said she and her siblings never fought growing up, so she thought we were really bad kids for a long time because we fought so much! She didn't realize until later that it's normal for kids to do that. I was SO mean to my brothers, too! Good thing I moved out of the house before they got big enough to pay me back! :)

[20droger]

The real problem with kids is that the damn things do NOT come with manuals. EVERYTHING is learn by trial and error. Lots of trial, and lots or error!

Been there. Done that. Glad it's well and truly over.

[wardie]

Mum2J&M - How ya feeling today, things calmer?

Wardie

:D:D

[Mum2J&M]

Hmmm... well, my youngest screamed when I dropped him off at school and pooped on the bathroom floor because I couldn't get to him in time (potty training) and the older one is up to his usual moaning and groaning, but otherwise, nothing too bad. They don't take naps anymore, so it's very interesting.

[gymell]

The real problem with kids is that the damn things do NOT come with manuals. EVERYTHING is learn by trial and error. Lots of trial, and lots or error!

Been there. Done that. Glad it's well and truly over.

Two words: duct tape. :)

Guess it's a good thing I don't have kids, huh? ;)

[tiziano]

Hmmm... well, my youngest screamed when I dropped him off at school and pooped on the bathroom floor because I couldn't get to him in time (potty training) and the older one is up to his usual moaning and groaning, but otherwise, nothing too bad. They don't take naps anymore, so it's very interesting.

Well, I see you are taking it cool, which means you are doing a good job! :)

I'm almost 42 and still single. For a long time, kids didn't even rate consideration. Then, for about five years in my 30's, I wanted kids. Then, all of a sudden, it changed again. I was talking with my ex-girlfriend tonight and one of the topics was kids. Given all that has occurred in my life recently, I feel like I'm missing something and that if I wait any longer, I won't have the opportunity to have kids. The main reason I haven't had kids yet is I'm flat-out scared! Also, I don't want them to go through what I've been through growing up; I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. So, I'm trying to sort it out and determine what I need and want to do. It's agonizing. I'm scared I'm making a huge mistake being childless up to this point. Man, I need a drink.


Karl, you can't image what she is experiencing, just like you can't know what you are missing. You have to go through it to really understand.
I reasoned just like you, years ago: "I am ok like this.. freedoom, fun ... " or "I am missing something, a child will complete my life"... It was all bulls**t!
I didn't know what I was talking about, in both cases. This because everything was always about "me". That's not the way is with children. It's all about them!
Now I have an 18 months old daugther, and two twin daughters on the way... :) And I am happy!
I don't know we will do... but we will manage somehow... even if you All are scaring me as hell! :D
Tiziano

[20droger]

Twin daughters, heh? Your poor husband... Twins usually wrap daddy around their little fingers--in a figure-8 motion. This can be very painful to the psyche, and the wallet. And the elder child will do her part to pre-break daddy.

The real fun comes later. Standard axiom: A boy in college spends 10% more than his parents can earn, a girl spends 20% more.

[tiziano]

Twin daughters, heh? Your poor husband... Twins usually wrap daddy around their little fingers--in a figure-8 motion. This can be very painful to the psyche, and the wallet. And the elder child will do her part to pre-break daddy.

The real fun comes later. Standard axiom: A boy in college spends 10% more than his parents can earn, a girl spends 20% more.

:)

I am sure it's going to be a mess... But I don't have many options now... I have just to keep going. Anyway so far everything was pretty easy. I guess the hard part comes now...

Tiziano

[20droger]

Anyhow, all joking aside... Congratulations!

I just heard on TV this morning that a woman just gave birth to her second set of triplets! Oy!

The odds of two sets of natural triplets to the same couple are about 64,000,000:1.

[tiziano]

Anyhow, all joking aside... Congratulations!

I just heard on TV this morning that a woman just gave birth to her second set of triplets! Oy!

The odds of two sets of natural triplets to the same couple are about 64,000,000:1.


Thanks 20droger!

But I can ensure you that the will be no more sets of twins, or triplets, or even singles from my side! :D

Tiziano