Anyone good with speeches?

[Mike]

My cricket club's annual dinner is looming and as captain I have to give a speech. Nothing too long or fancy, just a few minutes worth, but I'm drawing blanks at the moment :-|. Anyone got any ideas? Humor is a must!

[Pete]

http://www.speech-topics-help.com/after-dinner-speech-topics.html

[billash3]

Start out by finding a cricket outfit. Wear it to the dias. That'll set the proper tone. Then whatever you say from that point on won't be important....as if a speech at a cricket club annual dinner would be important, anyway.....

[steved110]

A fairly good rule of thumb is to drink less than the audience - a glass for your nerves is a good idea, more is a bad one!

Remember to speak clearly and not too fast and speak loud, don't read a speech off by rote, just have a card with bullet points - if you know what you are talking about it is pretty easy to wing it. Practice the jokes, test them on family members - some jokes are harder to do in public than others. You need to at least pretend to have eye contact with the audience - move your head and gaze around as if looking at people - or actually do it, assuming you can see them clearly - bright lights can render the audience pretty invisible.

And final advice - keep it short! People appreciate short speeches.

Good luck!

[yogestee]

Yeah,,,thank the Indians for beating the Aussies!!!!

[kblair210]

Speeches? We don't need no steenkin' speeches.

Best advice evah - Imagine the audience nude while you're speaking.

[tiziano]

Don't read
Speak slowly
look directly in the eyes of your audience, changing person every 2 or 3 seconds
Go directly to the topic, don't waste time.
Through in a couple of jokes.
Tell them what a great bunch they are.

Edit: sometimes telling them a meaningful story helps.

[Darsk47]

Make sure you know your place on the agenda and tailor the length of your time accordingly.

"the head can only take as much as the butt can withstand"

[MDJAK]

I've got an original beginning; just can't seem to finish it.

"Four Score and Seven Years Ago, Our Four Fathers Brought Forth On This Continent a New Nation, Conceived in Liberty and Dedicated to the Proposition that All Canon Owners are Equal."

[gjl711]

Why in the heck do you want to whack little crickets with them big paddles anyway. I mean their chirping can get annoying at times, but it's not that annoying. ;)