Things None should do at a POTN Meeting

[PhotoJourno]

Ok, with so many meetings around the U.S. and world wide (meaning Canada, Arizona, Londonish and Australia), I wanted to put together a list of things that participants would want to refrain from saying or doing during a POTN meet.

Please feel free to share your thoughts. :)

[PhotoJourno]

What NOT to do:

... Leave the Meeting with more gear than you arrived with. It can be tough to tell the judge you just "neglected to recognize a 500mm attached to a Mk3 camera slipping into your gear bag".

... Drinking all the wine in the house before telling at least one other person where in town you are staying.

[Becca]

... Leave the Meeting with more gear than you arrived with. It can be tough to tell the judge you just "neglected to recognize a 500mm attached to a Mk3 camera slipping into your gear bag".

I've done that! It was a circular polarizer that I borrowed from Mumbles at a Boston POTN meet up in the White Mountains last winter. But, in my defense, I followed him and returned it when he stopped to take some shots down the road.

[Moppie]

Being photographed by another POTN'r in a compromising position has to go top of the list.

[tommykjensen]

I wonder if Jake noticed that his bag was 500 mm lens lighter when he arrived back in the states :p

[stathunter]

Never do anything that you do not want everyone on the web to see--- everyone there has device to record you when you do something stupid. Trust me on this one.

[PhotoJourno]

If they tell you it is a nude POTN party, bring some clothes anyways.

All I am saying, just in case.

[Becca]

I wonder if Jake noticed that his bag was 500 mm lens lighter when he arrived back in the states :p

As heavy as his bag was to start, probably not! :D

[condyk]

I wanted to put together a list of things that participants would want to refrain from saying or doing during a POTN meet.
:)

I prefer to take a solution focused approach to this kind of challenge. So the question becomes what is the best preparation in advance of a meet and to ensure that all goes well on the actual day, at least from ones own point of view. I have five key tips that anyone can use in order to come away from a meet feeling that one is 'da man', which of course is the whole point :evil:

1. Many adopt particular persona within the realms of the virtual and so a meet challenges one to perform way beyond your dull personality and talent. Of course, few are capable of it for more than 5-10 minutes (max!) and so I advise hiring a much better looking, more charismatic, funnier double. While this can be pricey it offers opportunity to enhance rather than disappoint. Some of you may have a brother or sister who has been much more successful and so money or, more likely, bribery can be used there.

2. During the weeks leading up to the meet assess your own gear and consider which should be hired by way of impressive replacements for the day. Any of the sillier L's will do: 85mm 1.2, 50mm 1.2, 400mm 2.8. On the day mention narrow DOF a few times, stellar IS and ultra fast AF and you should be Ok (except in case of the two 1.2's of course, when you can mention 'sharp, but dog slow' as features! Let people handle and even shoot with these as this can add bonus points to your virtual identity later.

3. If you can't afford to hire gear then head early to your local camera store and buy on credit card their top of the range Domke, Kata, Crumpler and just walk about with it during the meet. Add a couple of small rocks inside so it looks full and leave your pathetic gear at home. No one will notice, but they will assume you are rich and successful. When the meeting is over then rush the bag back to the shop for a refund.

4. There is always a danger that the 'apparently' more experienced 'virtual' shooter will get bugged/found out by misc newbies on a real world meet. As in reality you are as dumb and ignorant as them it is important to surf over to Wikipendia and look up some more esoteric photography related concepts, such as 'diffraction', 'Rangefinder', 'lens coatings', or 'bokeh' (this latter spoken with a slight japanese accent so people also think you could be multi-lingual. This will amaze those around you and they will leave the meet thinking you are indeed the person they know so well in the virtual realm. if you ever get stuck with a question that you cannot answer then simply say you are much more interested in the creative side of photography rather than the dull technical stuff. This will shut the questioner up and encourage a look of awe to appear on their boat-race.

5. When on walkabout then make sure that people notice you peering at small things in the street and down apparently uninteresting alleys. This will make them think that you have a great photographers eye and are able to see subjects that they themselves have missed. Now and again then you may pretend to take a shot. Others are then likely to come over and take an actual shot ... of something!

Anyway, based on the various trips I have been on and meets I have attended I have found all the above to be both valuable and easy to do ... at least for a few hours. Best of luck :cool:

[PhotoJourno]

:lol::lol::lol::lol:

Condyk- Precious information!!.. This should be a sticky.

Can I just have BH overnight me a couple of 400mm lenses instead? I could then open my bag in front of everyone, and at their questioning, I could explain "oh, that one backup lens".

[S.Horton]

Don't invite PEKKA.

(If I'm assuming correctly, things *NOT* to do)

[cplchip]

Don't walk in with nothing but "noink" gear

[PhotoJourno]

Don't walk in with nothing but "noink" gear

OOOOOOHHHH!!! Fantastic thought !!!.... Can you imagine? Just for the H of it, resurface your old Noink Film stuff and show up with nothing but, and your real canon stuff in the trunk of the car (well unless you wanna push through the joke and leave the gear at home, though it could get tricky towards the end, when people shake hands and say "We should get together again").

[Flo]

Ahhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaa..condyk.that was hilarious!! Laughing outloud by my lonesome here!

[PhotoJourno]

uhm, don't offer to clean everyone's sensors with what you think is the perfect combination of bleach and Comet cleaner. It may end up with a massive law suit, but then it may also end in a ditch, covered in petrol, on fire.

[Becca]

Don't invite PEKKA.

(If I'm assuming correctly, things *NOT* to do)

Why not? I'd love to meet Pekka! I'll bet he's a lot of fun... most musicians I know are!

[20droger]

Well, I'm assuming that if Pekka were to find out what many of us are REALLY like, he might decide this whole forum thing is a waste of time and money (especially money).

Then where would we be? Nikonians?!!

[Darsk47]

I've yet to attend a POTN meet, but I'm sure doing this would be a no-no.

" Hey everybody, gather round.....I've got this great joke......here it goes.....

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to.........."

[PhotoJourno]

Here is another one.

Do not assume you have the right group or home. Always look at a photo of one or more of the participants before hand. This will keep you from hooking up with some leather wearing group at the local IHOP, or from having lunch with a family when you start to realize how little he knows about photography -for being a mod-, and they start to realize you are not the obnoxious irish uncle charlie.

[CyberDyneSystems]

1. Many adopt particular persona within the realms of the virtual and so a meet challenges one to perform way beyond your dull personality and talent. Of course, few are capable of it for more than 5-10 minutes (max!) and so I advise hiring a much better looking, more charismatic, funnier double.

Damn, Dave figured me out,. the truth is I have yet to go to Africa, and I've never met Dave or Tommy...
What was the give away? My rugged good looks? My charm and wit?

[FlyingPhotog]

Here is another one.

Do not assume you have the right group or home. Always look at a photo of one or more of the participants before hand. This will keep you from hooking up with some leather wearing group at the local IHOP, or from having lunch with a family when you start to realize how little he knows about photography -for being a mod-, and they start to realize you are not the obnoxious irish uncle charlie.

Someone please move this one to the top of the list...? :lol::lol::lol:

[condyk]

Then where would we be? Nikonians?!!

After the last week of popping in there I almost sold my Nikon gear and when back to Canon :confused::rolleyes:

Damn, Dave figured me out,. the truth is I have yet to go to Africa, and I've never met Dave or Tommy...
What was the give away? My rugged good looks? My charm and wit?

Yeah, man our doubles all had a great time at our expense I bet :evil: But the give away with you was the Aussie accent and with Patrick it was the dress and heels ... oh, but that actually could be him :lol::lol:

[Anke]

I prefer to take a solution focused approach to this kind of challenge. So the question becomes what is the best preparation in advance of a meet and to ensure that all goes well on the actual day, at least from ones own point of view. I have five key tips that anyone can use in order to come away from a meet feeling that one is 'da man', which of course is the whole point :evil:

1. Many adopt particular persona within the realms of the virtual and so a meet challenges one to perform way beyond your dull personality and talent. Of course, few are capable of it for more than 5-10 minutes (max!) and so I advise hiring a much better looking, more charismatic, funnier double. While this can be pricey it offers opportunity to enhance rather than disappoint. Some of you may have a brother or sister who has been much more successful and so money or, more likely, bribery can be used there.

2. During the weeks leading up to the meet assess your own gear and consider which should be hired by way of impressive replacements for the day. Any of the sillier L's will do: 85mm 1.2, 50mm 1.2, 400mm 2.8. On the day mention narrow DOF a few times, stellar IS and ultra fast AF and you should be Ok (except in case of the two 1.2's of course, when you can mention 'sharp, but dog slow' as features! Let people handle and even shoot with these as this can add bonus points to your virtual identity later.

3. If you can't afford to hire gear then head early to your local camera store and buy on credit card their top of the range Domke, Kata, Crumpler and just walk about with it during the meet. Add a couple of small rocks inside so it looks full and leave your pathetic gear at home. No one will notice, but they will assume you are rich and successful. When the meeting is over then rush the bag back to the shop for a refund.

4. There is always a danger that the 'apparently' more experienced 'virtual' shooter will get bugged/found out by misc newbies on a real world meet. As in reality you are as dumb and ignorant as them it is important to surf over to Wikipendia and look up some more esoteric photography related concepts, such as 'diffraction', 'Rangefinder', 'lens coatings', or 'bokeh' (this latter spoken with a slight japanese accent so people also think you could be multi-lingual. This will amaze those around you and they will leave the meet thinking you are indeed the person they know so well in the virtual realm. if you ever get stuck with a question that you cannot answer then simply say you are much more interested in the creative side of photography rather than the dull technical stuff. This will shut the questioner up and encourage a look of awe to appear on their boat-race.

5. When on walkabout then make sure that people notice you peering at small things in the street and down apparently uninteresting alleys. This will make them think that you have a great photographers eye and are able to see subjects that they themselves have missed. Now and again then you may pretend to take a shot. Others are then likely to come over and take an actual shot ... of something!

Anyway, based on the various trips I have been on and meets I have attended I have found all the above to be both valuable and easy to do ... at least for a few hours. Best of luck :cool:

Hilarious!! :D :D Nice one :D

[PhotoJourno]

Here are some conversational injunctions you would probably want to test before you use them on a POTN meeting:

"..Well, technically, that's illegal"

"..I have a Sister who's uncle helped Ansel Adams airbrush rocks in his photos".

"..Bresson was nicknamed Cartier after he'd been seen selling a camera to get a new watch"

"..Look into these eyes...Have you ever killed a man?"

"..Don't worry, my best photographic attribute is precognition"

"..Sorry, I left my white papers on Canon's prototypes back at the Yatch"

"..So I says to the guy, I says 'Who reads the Newyorker anyways!!' and I hanged up"

" I love your photos, but this salad... it sucks"

" Yeah, I was in Iraq, Afghanistan, Soviet Union, Cuba, Colombian Cartel, Panama, Granada, taking thousands of photos. huh? Oh, the government kept the camera, and I am not suppossed to discuss the details".

".. Canon really sucks. I just bought it to come to your meetings and freeload on your food and booze. Say Cheese !!!".

[condyk]

Yeah ... and then there was the meet when I brought my dog Chives along: he has been conditioned to bark at the sound of a shutter going off and then expects food. It pretty much killed the long day of candid street shooting we had planned :o

[saravrose]

Damn, Dave figured me out,. the truth is I have yet to go to Africa, and I've never met Dave or Tommy...
What was the give away? My rugged good looks? My charm and wit?

hmmm....I wonder who you REALLY are.. ;)

Yeah ... and then there was the meet when I brought my dog Chives along: he has been conditioned to bark at the sound of a shutter going off and then expects food. It pretty much killed the long day of candid street shooting we had planned :o

five points Dave. I'm going to be laughing myself to sleep. :lol::lol::lol:

[Moppie]

hmmm....I wonder who you REALLY are.. ;)



five points Dave. I'm going to be laughing myself to sleep. :lol::lol::lol:


It is not a who, but a what.
Chances are those on the Africa trip might have just encountered an early T series prototype (this may explain many things).

[CyberDyneSystems]

Here are some conversational injunctions you would probably want to test before you use them on a POTN meeting:

"..Well, technically, that's illegal"

"..I have a Sister who's uncle helped Ansel Adams airbrush rocks in his photos".

"..Bresson was nicknamed Cartier after he'd been seen selling a camera to get a new watch"

"..Look into these eyes...Have you ever killed a man?"

"..Don't worry, my best photographic attribute is precognition"

"..Sorry, I left my white papers on Canon's prototypes back at the Yatch"

"..So I says to the guy, I says 'Who reads the Newyorker anyways!!' and I hanged up"

" I love your photos, but this salad... it sucks"

" Yeah, I was in Iraq, Afghanistan, Soviet Union, Cuba, Colombian Cartel, Panama, Granada, taking thousands of photos. huh? Oh, the government kept the camera, and I am not suppossed to discuss the details".

".. Canon really sucks. I just bought it to come to your meetings and freeload on your food and booze. Say Cheese !!!".

ROFLMAO! NICE!

[PhotoJourno]

ROFLMAO! NICE!

Thanks man. :)

[CyberDyneSystems]

"..Look into these eyes...Have you ever killed a man?"


What do you think Junior? You think these hands have been soaking in Ivory Liquid?

[Maureen Souza]

If they tell you it is a nude POTN party, bring some clothes anyways.

All I am saying, just in case.
Don't get any ideas about this weekend's get together at Dwights.;)

[condyk]

Don't get any ideas about this weekend's get together at Dwights.;)

I'm already visualising Dwight in a slightly too tight toga welcoming all you at the door with a glass of Zinfandel White Rose, then guiding the ladies into his hot tub room.

[fubarhouse]

My contributions:

1) Walk into the meeting with a P&S and ask questions like "how do I do video" and "how can I get a blurry background".
2) Walk into the meeting with only Nikon gear and then ask questions, with the dial set to green box.
3) Having chronic lens/camera envy, so bad you can't concentrate on your own gear or what people are saying.
And out of all seriousness...
4) Rock up drunk or stoned... Big nono...
5) Walk in with your friends (with no cameras) and say "who invited these queers".

I think these would easily get you kicked out - especially 4&5. Excempt of #3 I'm sure that could be tolerated :)

[20droger]

Say nasty things about Rhode Island to CDS, and accuse him of living in a certain large building in Concord.

[S.Horton]

Take only video.......

:p

[PiRho]

things not to do?

after the beer gets around, inviting everyone to do drop tests off the balcony... that could end very badly!

wait did I say invite... I meant do drop tests with other peoples gear.

[S.Horton]

Drop a lens.

Or, worse, someone else's lens.

;}

[zacker]

Don't walk in with nothing but "noink" gear


by the Amount of "D3" threads here in the last few months, It wouldnt surprise me at all to see at least two Noink fans attending and acting too cool for school.
:lol:

[PhotoJourno]

by the Amount of "D3" threads here in the last few months, It wouldnt surprise me at all to see at least two Noink fans attending and acting too cool for school.
:lol:


Really... that could be one of the worse things to do at a POTN meet. Or worse, the infamous 'Switcher'.

"So... how About the D3 and D700?... If Canon does not release a new model soon, I might just switch to Nikon".

[20droger]

Really... that could be one of the worse things to do at a POTN meet. Or worse, the infamous 'Switcher'.

"So... how About the D3 and D700?... If Canon does not release a new model soon, I might just switch to Nikon".
Hmph! I'm with you!

Every time I see one of those "switcher" posts, I SO want to reply, "Please do! Then you can go annoy Nikonians, and leave us alone!"

But being the kind, loving, patient person I am, I don't. (Of course, fear of the moderators may have a teensy bit to do with it.)

[PhotoJourno]

Hmph! I'm with you!

Every time I see one of those "switcher" posts, I SO want to reply, "Please do! Then you can go annoy Nikonians, and leave us alone!"

But being the kind, loving, patient person I am, I don't. (Of course, fear of the moderators may have a teensy bit to do with it.)


What!? Aren't you replying that? I sure am. I even offer to buy their gear, and give them a $200 bonus to sign with Nikonians. :)

[20droger]

Nah! They're not worth the time or the money.

I just place them on my ship list.

[PiRho]

Another thing NOT to bring to a POTN meet would be a powerful EMP device :oops: I guess some of that gear wasn't under warrenty anymore.

[Wazza]

Being photographed by another POTN'r in a compromising position has to go top of the list.

Like that's ever happened? :lol:

--
All too funny, especially Dave's remarks :)

My biggest No No, don't bring along seriousness.

[Maureen Souza]

I'm already visualising Dwight in a slightly too tight toga welcoming all you at the door with a glass of Zinfandel White Rose, then guiding the ladies into his hot tub room.
Ya know...........you aren't too far off the mark there, Dave! :D:D

[PiRho]

Any more things not to bring?


shameless bump

[DunnoWhen]

I prefer to take a solution focused approach to this kind of challenge. ......................
etc etc.

If I bookmark this post and thence follow this advice, am I more likely to succeed in any future application for a GAPS position?:)

[condyk]

etc etc.

If I bookmark this post and thence follow this advice, am I more likely to succeed in any future application for a GAPS position?:)

I suspect success is assured. but you have a lot of catching up to do. I have managed, barely, to cover my pink ass for a total of six weeks to date ... at least I think so :o

[PhotoJourno]

- If you're going to pick your nose, please say "Excuse me" before flicking.

- It is a little known fact of etiquette to belch loudly after every sip of coffee while at any kind of social meeting.

- Comments on wine are always a must. Use foreign words to describe its qualities, such as "Jenesequoi" (pronounced "shae-nay-say-quaa"). Also, it always helps to think of your favorite wet soap bar falling to an unpaved road. Use words like "Soapy, Dirty, dusty, rocky, etc"

- Bring a new tradition to the Meet. It always helps keep the spirit of POTN meetings alive. For example, the popular poultry trick. Bring a live chicken, and as disguise explain everyone you have been comissioned to care for it, and did not have the heart to leave it at home. Later on, you can explain the real purpose of the chicken. Invite others into a ritualistic photographing of the chicken, followed by a beheading and plucking of the same. Boil the internal organs and eat them, to show your fellow photographers you ain't afraid of nut'n. This is a trick sure to keep you in the minds of all those who visit with you.

- Never shoot your own camera. In many places, this is a blatant sign of arrogance and condescention. Instead, ask others all the time when you want to take a photo, and then make sure to remind them which one it was, as you would not want them to keep the rights to the images. If things come to worse, you may -as per the Geneva Convention- collect all cameras from participants until cooperation is given, or your photos are safely copied onto your file. But do show your camera at the last few minutes of the meet, this is taken mostly as a sign of financial independence and great taste for Canon Gear.

More suggestions to follow...

[Alexei TND]

- If you're going to pick your nose, please say "Excuse me" before flicking.

- It is a little known fact of etiquette to belch loudly after every sip of coffee while at any kind of social meeting.

- Comments on wine are always a must. Use foreign words to describe its qualities, such as "Jenesequoi" (pronounced "shae-nay-say-quaa"). Also, it always helps to think of your favorite wet soap bar falling to an unpaved road. Use words like "Soapy, Dirty, dusty, rocky, etc"

- Bring a new tradition to the Meet. It always helps keep the spirit of POTN meetings alive. For example, the popular poultry trick. Bring a live chicken, and as disguise explain everyone you have been comissioned to care for it, and did not have the heart to leave it at home. Later on, you can explain the real purpose of the chicken. Invite others into a ritualistic photographing of the chicken, followed by a beheading and plucking of the same. Boil the internal organs and eat them, to show your fellow photographers you ain't afraid of nut'n. This is a trick sure to keep you in the minds of all those who visit with you.

- Never shoot your own camera. In many places, this is a blatant sign of arrogance and condescention. Instead, ask others all the time when you want to take a photo, and then make sure to remind them which one it was, as you would not want them to keep the rights to the images. If things come to worse, you may -as per the Geneva Convention- collect all cameras from participants until cooperation is given, or your photos are safely copied onto your file. But do show your camera at the last few minutes of the meet, this is taken mostly as a sign of financial independence and great taste for Canon Gear.

More suggestions to follow...

delightfully random
delightfully so

[PiRho]

ok time for some more entries! what else should one NOT do at a POTN meet? or have there been no more meets for the last year?

[Tdragone]

Since someone already took MY "Dont drop someone else's lens" I say ask every 5-10 minutes..

Does anyone have a roll of ASA100 I can borrow??