Crticism Applied

[jfrancho]

I've posted a similar pic recently (http://photography-on-the.net/forum/showthread.php?t=71697). I received some CC, and here are the results, with a different model. I think this one is more subtle. Let me know what you thought.

http://plan-b.smugmug.com/photos/22918651-M.jpg

[sixshot]

Its interesting but not sure what to make of it. Sorry, not usually this vague!

[jfrancho]

Another interesting shot indeed. 70+ views, and sixshot is the only one honest enough to say what he felt.

[markubig]

i don't know what your objective is, but it's a little too soft for my taste . . . but that's just me.

[jfrancho]

The softness was to suggest purity, peacefulness.

[Titus213]

Very pure and peaceful.:lol:

[Halliday]

Asleep or dead, not really sure :|

[markubig]

was the softness applied in post? if so, maybe try a little less? he's almost as blurry as the background, which is making the picture one big blur. maybe if you just sharpen him a little bit to make him stand out.

Again, this is just MHO . . .

[huminuh83]

The softness was to suggest purity, peacefulness.



I get that you're trying to make it feel calm and peaceful by making it really soft. But for some reason, the color of the picture makes me feel otherwise. It feels kind of cold. When i think calm and peaceful, I think warm colors. My suggestion would be to try a different, more warm hue.

[jfrancho]

I think I would lose some of the irony had I gone warmer. Here is a similar shot using warm tones. This time the eyes are open.

http://plan-b.smugmug.com/photos/21281540-M-1.jpg

[jfrancho]

I'm giving this a bump, since I want to get more discussion on this. I don't really need any technical ("it's soft") unless they contribute to your impression of the picture.

[berto]

i'm curious, what are you trying to convey with the photos? peaceful serenity through, death or sleeping?
not an insult. i'm just curious.

[Rob612]

Beside any technical aspect, I have to agree with some others. Do you mean to represent peace and serenity ? If so, to me it just does not work. I cannot explain why, it just doesn't. Sorry. OTOH, if what you want to represent death I think you got it. My 0.02 are true for both pics.

[bikerider]

The images don't do anything for me.......it does seem you are communicating about death, I think sharp or grainy and contrasty b&w images convey that much better.
Roger.

[lostdoggy]

I agree with others that the picture shows death and not serenity. The flow is not there. I see a head laying on the ground fading away as in death. There is a need of something more symbolic that convey serenity. The original picture is blue a cool color that also convey death. Serenity is usually represented by for example flowing of water, falling feather, or a sleeping baby. The direction of the face is facing also show less then serenity. Maybe if he was sitting in say a yoga position with his thumb touching his middle finger. The second picture has an unnatural tinge of green and the yellow is too deep. The tools laying next to him also prevey anything but serenity. Maybe exhaustion.

I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but ask so I'm just giving you my 0.02.

[kenyc]

i'm curious, what are you trying to convey with the photos? peaceful serenity through, death or sleeping?
not an insult. i'm just curious.

Exactly.

Since this is an "unusual" photo, we can only critique it if we know your intent.

KAC

[jfrancho]

I agree with others that the picture shows death and not serenity. The flow is not there. I see a head laying on the ground fading away as in death. There is a need of something more symbolic that convey serenity. The original picture is blue a cool color that also convey death. Serenity is usually represented by for example flowing of water, falling feather, or a sleeping baby. The direction of the face is facing also show less then serenity. Maybe if he was sitting in say a yoga position with his thumb touching his middle finger. The second picture has an unnatural tinge of green and the yellow is too deep. The tools laying next to him also prevey anything but serenity. Maybe exhaustion.

I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but ask so I'm just giving you my 0.02.I try not to take others' personal observation the wrong way. I really like the idea of a falling feather for the first picture. I had a really different intentions for the second. The color treatment was meant to show heat, maybe extreme heat. That heat could be anger, or rage. Both of these were testing my ability to add information to the picture, without implicitly showing that in the picture. Some have expressed dislike for the tools, but in this one I think they add what the feather you suggested for the first would. The tools are masculine, maybe a little bit primal. I was seeking a subtle, violent undertone for that. Anyway, I really appreciate the time you took to really look, and give me some input.

[jfrancho]

Exactly.

Since this is an "unusual" photo, we can only critique it if we know your intent.

KACI am not sure whether my intentions would help you. I've given quite a bit of information. I guess my intentions are for your feedback. That isn't to say that's why I made the picture, but I don't think my intentions are important at this point. If you don't like it, or see something in the picture, then so be it. I've got pretty think skin, you can tell me the truth, the way you see it.

[Rob612]

I think the problem that most of us has (or at least I do) is that plain and simple we don't understand what you meant with the picture. If I am right, this is constructive critique.

I have to say that this thread is very interesting. Somehow is pulling out what we have inside.

[ProAc_Fan]

Have to agree with the others. Peaceful is not the feeling tbis image conveys. It looks like an OOF CSI crime scene photo.

Mike