Help! I have been asked to shoot a funeral

[Rebel]

Hi all, a very close friend of mine has asked me to take some pictures of his mom's funeral. She was taken suddenly and she was only 59. My question is, is there anything I should know or any protocols or sensitive shots I should avoid? If anyone can offer any advice, be it from your own professional experience or even your personal feelings about it, please let me know. I will shoot tomorrow, Sunday, June 25. I believe we are 12 hours ahead of US time.

[robertwgross]

Absolutely no photographs very near the casket.

Generally, all anybody wants is one wide shot from back in the room. In fact, a funeral is something that many people want to put out of their minds, so few photos are ever wanted. One use for the photos is to send to relatives or friends that were not able to attend the service, so general shots are somewhat useful.

---Bob Gross---

[lostdoggy]

When my father pass away last year I didn't take any picture in the funeral home. Just didn't feel right. But, I took picture after the funeral when all our friends gather in the restaurant. This a Chinese tradition, we feed those who pay their respect and offer a toast to the deceased. I think the photos during the burial is very emotional and would offer a more moving (emotionally) picture. The grass and trees shows life while the guest shows respect and love. I guessing that she was asking you to capture the emotional side of this uneventful event. It would be best to show her your creative skill in photos documenting the moment expessing the feeling she is having.

[Conk]

I wouldn't even consider bringing a camera into a funeral parlor. Not a chance! As said, after at the wake maybe.

[Reflection]

Definitely not during the service or anything, but perhaps before as people are arriving and leaving (if not attending the wake), but keep your distance.

[Rebel]

Thanks for all the tips, folks. I guess this is a very sensitive issue, which is why I came here to seek your advice. I appreciate all your comments. I have my own feelings about this and I needed to put that aside for a moment in order to help a friend out during his time of need. Here's what I did.

I asked my friend straight about his expectations of the photographs. He specifically wanted a photograph of the body and escorted me to the casket so that I wouldn't feel awkward with the other guests. He also wanted to document the occassion for family and friends overseas that couldn't make it for the service. All in all, it turned out beautifully.

I avoided any shots of people crying. During the eulogies, I took my shots early, before any breakdown. I also went around the room and took wide, generic crowd shots so they can remember who shared the day with them. For obvious reasons, I cannot post the pictures but I wanted to write down my experience to help anyone who may be one day put in this situation.

My advice is: ask the family what they would like you to take, and more importantly, if there is anything you should avoid. Had I not done this, I would have not taken anything near the casket and especially of the body, but I would have disappointed my friend as he was expecting it. On the flip side, had I taken a picture of the body without asking him, especially if he was not expecting nor wanting it, he would have been in a difficult position when he went through the CD.

Funerals, like weddings and birth celebrations are all entirely dictated by religious and cultural beliefs. Most of us have very deeply rooted feelings about certain traditions. If ever you are in a position to help a grieving family out, try to put your own feelings aside and focus instead on theirs. It may be a little awkward to ask someone straight out what they would like, but it is the better than the alternative I feel.

Oce again, many thanks to you all that responded to this. I just hope I was able to help someone by sharing my experience here.

[Curtis N]

I just hope I was able to help someone by sharing my experience here.I'm sure you did.

It sounds like you handled the job professionally and helped your friend in a way that no one else could. I'm sure he is grateful.

[d'homme]

I've done about 15 funerals. Did one is January. Here are my tips.

1. Obviously if you're taking pictures, someone from the family has asked you. It's like doing wedding, you are memorializing that day. You just probably take less photos. Find out what the family wants pictures. THATS the most important thing. Contrary to whats posted, I've always taken photos of the deceased, at the request of the family. Sometimes the wife stands next to the casket, or sometimes if there are siblings, they stand next to the open casket, for that last family shot. (Im not tryn to be funny)

2. Quietly take pics of the people in the room before the funeral actually starts. Remember families usually only get to gether en masse for weddings and funerals. There may be out of town family members there, that whoever asked you do this, may want shots of later (the Repass)

3. Once the funeral actually starts, I relinquish myself to the back, and the camera goes on the tripod. I take pics of speakers, singers, choirs and anything of interest, but I stay out the way. Put that digital on 1600iso and use your zoom.

4. I take pics as they are rolling the body out and it goes into the hearse. Flowers go out first and the either the deceased or the family.

5. At the gravesite, I once again try to be as undistracting as possible. No flash, and my zoon. I can stand a distance back and take pics of the family. Take pics of the casket as it goes down, if they do that while the family is there. Some cemetaries don't.

Maybe its cultural, but this is how I've done them

[Rebel]

Thank you, those are very helpful tips. I really appreciate all your interest and input on this.

[lime]

Sorry if this is late, but here's a link to one that was done exceptionaly well.
http://www.fredmiranda.com/forum/topic/230824/0

[TonyKInTexas]

Bob,

Not always true. A friend lost a daughter at age 16. She wanted up close photos of the open casket during viewing and I was instructued to shoot the entire proceedings. As the funueral was held in a school gym, I did not have to deal with a funeral director and as I was working for the mother (free of course) I did what she told me to do. I did stay against the walls and tried to keep out of people's way.

My advice to the OP is to get with the funeral director and let him know the request. The work with the funeral home and the family to determine when the photos should be done, what photos should be taken and how to handle the entire assignment.

Absolutely no photographs very near the casket.

Generally, all anybody wants is one wide shot from back in the room. In fact, a funeral is something that many people want to put out of their minds, so few photos are ever wanted. One use for the photos is to send to relatives or friends that were not able to attend the service, so general shots are somewhat useful.

---Bob Gross---

[TonyKInTexas]

Yup, it turns out I was late. Rebel, it looks like you handled the situation in a very considerate manner.

Thank you for sharing your experiences.

[Maureen Souza]

While I have not done any funerals, my sister has always taken photos of my deceased relatives, the grave ceremonies, etc. I am very grateful now to have copies of those pictures.

[exposingmyself]

I did what she told me to do. Bravo Tony!

I agree with Tony. Work with the family and take photos as family has requested if you can do so.

Hope things went well.