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Thread started 02 Feb 2006 (Thursday) 23:46
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How is life in first year of marriage?

 
FlyingPhotog
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Sep 03, 2008 21:09 |  #91

This may sound odd to some but beyond honestly loving the other person, take a step back and make sure you honestly like them as well.

I've had relationships come and go over the years that were hot and heavy out of the gate but as time went by, I realized that there wasn't enough mental and emotional interest and/or support to sustain a relationship beyond the physical.

When I met my wife, we were engaged after five weeks and married about a year later. Of course I love my wife but also, I like my wife. A lot. In fact, she's my best friend.

I think that's important for the long term health of a relationship...


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FocalPrincess
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Sep 03, 2008 21:10 |  #92

cdifoto wrote in post #1151069 (external link)
I get along with my L glass just fine!


Seriously though...make sure she understands up front that she will NOT tell you how to spend your money. Some women have trouble letting their men spend money on the camera gear they want or need. Don't let her be the boss of your cash.

That said...put her financial needs first. Don't make her go hungry because you want a new lens. As a husband your job will be to provide for her first and foremost. Toys come last.

But at the same time, don't boss her around with HER money...just make sure you communicate really well. Be honest, be fair. Be understanding. If you haven't lived together, it will be an adjustment for both of you. Some of the dumbest things will annoy the snot out of you, but you'll love some of the dumbest things (for instance, maybe how she puts her toothbrush, something really dorky like that).


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gift is nothing without work." ~ Emile Zola

  
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S.Horton
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Sep 04, 2008 03:00 |  #93

I'm on marriage #2.

If I knew the answers, I'd be happier than I am today.


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:cool:

  
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cdifoto
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Sep 04, 2008 03:09 |  #94

My step-grandfather is the king at making marriage last.

He bought earplugs.


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S.Horton
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Sep 04, 2008 03:10 |  #95

Booooooowwwwwwwwwwwaah​hahahahhahah


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harroz
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Sep 04, 2008 03:11 |  #96

live life, love life, and be free. :-D



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oldtimingman
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Sep 09, 2008 17:33 |  #97

run forest run


...............old


Excuse me old timer....she said sweetly, is that a 300mm IS prime in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?

  
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GPR1
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Sep 09, 2008 23:31 as a reply to  @ oldtimingman's post |  #98

I was offered an important observation at my wedding: Love is a choice, not an emotion. The emotion can wax an wane daily based on lots of factors that may have nothing really to do with you or your spouse. That's where the choice becomes very important.


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Colorblinded
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Sep 09, 2008 23:37 |  #99

Well if one of my friends was any indication, I'd say stay far far away from marriage!


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cdifoto
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Sep 10, 2008 10:18 |  #100

emorphien wrote in post #6276730 (external link)
Well if one of my friends was any indication, I'd say stay far far away from marriage!

Poor soul. Traditional burial or cremation?


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fishfoto
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Sep 10, 2008 12:04 |  #101

Just remember this.....once you have kids, it all changes!

My first one arrived a few hours before my 25th birthday on 2000 (Lauren was born June 17th, my birthday is June 18th, it also happened to be fathers day!) followed by Max in Dec 04 and Bubba (his legal name is Simon) at the end of January 2007........

.......the changes in the relationship after the first baby were significant but subtle. With the addition of #2 and #3 the whole dynamic changes. It is no longer about the two of you, it is about ALL OF YOU.

I've been with Susie for 10 years come this November (she swears I'm a one night stand who just wouldn't go away) and through the ups and downs we just adapt. Adapting is hard, but if you are committed you deal with it and move forward (FYI: Once you have three kids you'll want to be committed to a nice padded room).

Just remember this, if you have kids.....they come first! My job has had me on the road since I was 16. When we were just 'us' and I was gone it was hard, but OK. When we had just one child it was hard, but manageable. When #2 showed up I spent my first year on the road 3+ days a week, every week, month in and month out for a year. I ended up quitting my job as a Director of Photography overseeing 5 international business magazines (worked out well as my job was about to be made 'redundant'). I quite because I wanted to be with my son and he barely knew me, and my wife was really getting stretched to thing.

Now with #3 I have tried to create a travel schedule that lets me do what I need to do while accounting for what my wife needs as well. She has her schedule, I have my kids schedules I need to keep in mind and when I can I work around them, which can mean bounding through three continents in 3.5 days to make sure I am home for dinner on Sunday night with my kids:0)

So forget the challenges of marriage if you plan on having kids and check out the complexity of making your relationship work when there is a much more complex dynamic to your relationship.


- Fish
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AngryCorgi
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Sep 10, 2008 12:44 |  #102

I've been married for 9 months now. No problems yet. The financial impact of the wedding/honeymoon is there, but I have not had any issues with financial disagreements with my wife. I made sure that we were mentally compatible in the financial area before getting engaged though.


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...Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, Wisdom is knowing not to include it in a fruit salad...

  
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SoaringUSAEagle
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Sep 10, 2008 13:16 |  #103

I could not have asked for better!


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deadpass
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Sep 10, 2008 21:10 |  #104

it's brutal. but it gets better.


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Maureen ­ Souza
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Sep 10, 2008 23:41 |  #105

deadpass wrote in post #6283533 (external link)
it's brutal. but it gets better.

:lol::lol::lol::lol:


Life is hard...but I just take it one photograph at a time.

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How is life in first year of marriage?
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