LOG IN    OR   REGISTER TO FORUMS


Whats Your Favourite Joke? (TOTALLY unrelated to photography)

FORUMS Community Talk, Chatter & Official Stuff The Lounge
Thread started 26 Sep 2005 (Monday) 09:27   
LIST NEARBY THREADS
 
MattyB
Goldmember
MattyB's Avatar
Joined May 2005
1,661 posts
Melbourne, Australia
[MORE/SHARE]

well, we all know photographers are sexy, smooth, charming and the opposite sex can't resist us, but we're also funny with a good sence of humour!

so let everyone read it, your favourite joke of all time. - or one that made you wet your pants lately.

personally, i love stupid jokes. they make me keel over in fits of laughter.

ie;

Knock knock.
Who's there?
The interrupting cow.
The interr--
Moo.


or,

A great dane, a scotty, and a chihuahua were sitting in a bar, knocking back a few, when a beautiful **** walked in.
"Okay, boys," she purred. "I'll make a very happy dog out of whoever can come up with the best proposition, using the words 'cheese' and 'liver'."
The great dane thought a moment, then stated: "I don't like cheese, but I sure like liver, and I like you, too!" He panted and wagged his tail.
The lady just looked away.
The scotty immediately said "I like cheese, and I like liver, AND I like you!" and wagged his tail expectantly.
She ignored him.
Then the chihuahua growled "Liver alone! Cheese with me."
They left together.


lucky last,

There once were two skunks; one named 'In" and one named 'Out." When Out was in, In was out, and when Out was out, In was in. One day, Out was in and In was out, and Mother skunk said 'Out, I want you to go out and bring In in." Out quickly went outside and almost immediately returned with In. Mother skunk was AMAZED and gasped "How did you DO that so quickly?"
"Easy," said Out. "In stinked."

Get it?

*sorry to be unrelated to photography, just wanted a laugh :D*

tell us yours!

Mod Edit:
The "Baby Photographer/Tripod Joke" has been around longer than forever. The repeated posts by people to whom it is "new" may be found here. If you post it in this thread (or anywhere else on POTN) the Moderators will seriously consider banning you.

Jon

Post #1, Sep 26, 2005 09:27:25


Matt Bennell
Camera: Canon EOS 300D DSLR Black
Extras: 18-55mm, 50mm 1.8, Tripod, Imagination
[SIZE=1]Field: You name it, I've shot it.. Or about to shoot it today :lol:
Recently Updated Folio/Gallery -> http://mbp.fotopic.net​/external link

LOG IN TO REPLY
sponsored links
(this ad will go away when you log in as registered member)
PhotosGuy
Moderator
PhotosGuy's Avatar
Joined Feb 2004
69,101 posts
S. E. Michigan
[MORE/SHARE]

Whats Your Favourite Joke?

Our politicians! :D Seems that we get what we deserve!
My 2nd favorite is universally hated by women everywhere & I can't tell it here! Or my fav photographer's joke! But if you like puns, try thisexternal link. ;)

Post #2, Sep 26, 2005 11:21:19


FrankC - 20D, RAW, Manual everything...
Classic Carz, Racing, Air Show, Flowers.
Find the light... A few Car Lighting Tips, and MOVE YOUR FEET!
Have you thought about making your own book? // Need an exposure crutch?
New Image Size Limits: Image must not exceed 1280 pixels on any side.

LOG IN TO REPLY
Scottes
Trigger Man - POTN Retired
Scottes's Avatar
Joined Nov 2003
12,842 posts
A Little North Of Boston, MA, USA
[MORE/SHARE]

A priest, a rabbi and a duck walk into a bar, and the bartender says "What is this? A joke?"

Post #3, Sep 26, 2005 11:22:19


You can take my 100-400 L away when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers.
Scottes' Rum Pages - Rum Reviews And Infoexternal link
Follower of Fidget - Joined the cult of HAMSTTR©

LOG IN TO REPLY
MattyB
THREAD ­ STARTER
Goldmember
MattyB's Avatar
Joined May 2005
1,661 posts
Melbourne, Australia
[MORE/SHARE]

LOL! a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?"

Post #4, Sep 26, 2005 12:31:20


Matt Bennell
Camera: Canon EOS 300D DSLR Black
Extras: 18-55mm, 50mm 1.8, Tripod, Imagination
[SIZE=1]Field: You name it, I've shot it.. Or about to shoot it today :lol:
Recently Updated Folio/Gallery -> http://mbp.fotopic.net​/external link

LOG IN TO REPLY
glenhead
Senior Member
glenhead's Avatar
Joined Jun 2005
156 posts
Austin, TX
[MORE/SHARE]

Just taught this one to my nine-year-old...

How do you spell "farm"?

E-I-E-I-O

Post #5, Sep 26, 2005 14:55:42 as a reply to MattyB's post 2 hours earlier.


Glen
EOS 10D/grip | 50mm f/1.4 USM | 28-105mm f/3.5-4.6 USM | 100-300 f/4.0-5.6 USM | 380EX

Eschew misoneism

LOG IN TO REPLY
sponsored links
(this ad will go away when you log in as registered member)
rabidmoose171
Senior Member
Joined Aug 2005
189 posts
[MORE/SHARE]

Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

Post #6, Sep 26, 2005 15:13:47


DRebel XT, 24mm/f2.8, 50mm/f1.8, 70-200mm/f4L, 1.4x Tcon

LOG IN TO REPLY
Citizensmith
Cream of the Crop
Citizensmith's Avatar
Joined Dec 2004
6,382 posts
Sacramento, CA USA
[MORE/SHARE]

What do you call a mushroom who buys you lots of drinks?

A fungi to be with.

:)

Post #7, Sep 26, 2005 15:27:08


My POTN Gallery, Complete gear list,
Tradition - Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid.

LOG IN TO REPLY
Radtech1
Everlasting Gobstopper
Radtech1's Avatar
Joined Jun 2003
6,383 posts
Trantor
[MORE/SHARE]

Did'ja hear the one about the two peanuts walking through the park?

One was assalted.

Rad

Post #8, Sep 26, 2005 15:48:27


.
.

Be humble, for you are made of the earth. Be noble, for you are made of the stars.

LOG IN TO REPLY
zacker
Cream of the Crop
zacker's Avatar
Joined Jan 2005
6,005 posts
Oxford, CT.
[MORE/SHARE]

A man sitting at a deli counter notices a blonde girl a couple seats down, reading a news paper and she looks really upset, "Whats wrong"? asks the guy. The blonde says, "Look here, the headline says,12 Brazillian Soldiers killed!" Then the Blond looks the guy in the eyes and asks..... "How many is a Brazillian?"
lol,lol,lol.
-zacker-

Post #9, Sep 26, 2005 15:55:00


http://www.theanimalha​ven.comexternal link
My Facebook, Friend me If you want!http://www.facebook.co​m/brokenfencephotograp​hyexternal link

http://www.facebook.co​m/theanimalhaven?ref=t​sexternal link

LOG IN TO REPLY
Skip ­ Souza
Moderator
Skip Souza's Avatar
Joined Mar 2005
26,204 posts
The Left Coast in the Land of Fruits and Nuts
[MORE/SHARE]

The masochist pleads; "Hurt me, beat me, mistreat me, make me write bad cheques."
The sadist replies:

Wait for it........

"Noooooo"

Post #10, Sep 26, 2005 15:59:56


Bless the recently fallen and their family and friends.
I have a Cannon with me at all times. You can't take the shot if you don't have something with which to shoot. :rolleyes:
That which does not kill me ~~ Should Run.
5DMkII, 7D, 70-300L IS, 24-105L,
No more PayPal gift payment requests.
"PERSONAL MESSAGING REGARDING SELLING OR BUYING ITEMS WITH MEMBERS WHO HAVE NO POSTS IN FORUMS AND/OR WHO YOU DO NOT KNOW FROM FORUMS IS HEREBY DECLARED STRICTLY STUPID AND YOU WILL GET BURNED."

LOG IN TO REPLY
IanD
Cream of the Crop
Honorary Moderator
IanD's Avatar
Joined Dec 2003
5,154 posts
Montreal, Canada
[MORE/SHARE]

Scottes wrote:
A priest, a rabbi and a duck walk into a bar, and the bartender says "What is this? A joke?"

That's my duck!:)

Post #11, Sep 26, 2005 18:52:04 as a reply to Scottes's post 7 hours earlier.


Ian (Duck Photographer)
Have You Hugged Your Mallard Today?
More Images-external linkMy Gear
New Image Posting Rules (please read)


LOG IN TO REPLY
sponsored links
(this ad will go away when you log in as registered member)
IanD
Cream of the Crop
Honorary Moderator
IanD's Avatar
Joined Dec 2003
5,154 posts
Montreal, Canada
[MORE/SHARE]

Hickory dickory doc,
3 mice ran up the clock.
The clock struck one,
The other two escaped with minor injuries..............

:):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

(Yeah, OK, sue me):):)

Post #12, Sep 26, 2005 18:55:11 as a reply to IanD's post 3 minutes earlier.


Ian (Duck Photographer)
Have You Hugged Your Mallard Today?
More Images-external linkMy Gear
New Image Posting Rules (please read)


LOG IN TO REPLY
75D
Goldmember
75D's Avatar
Joined Mar 2005
1,504 posts
Montreal, Quebec, Canada
[MORE/SHARE]

Is it just me or do these Buffalo wings taste like chicken?

Post #13, Sep 26, 2005 19:09:08


40D Rebel XT
Kit Lens 18-55mm
EF 50mm 1.8 II
90-300 Canon EF
Sigma 17-70 2.8-4.5 Macro, Sigma 70-200 2.8, Sigma 10-20 3.5

LOG IN TO REPLY
Nidz
Goldmember
Nidz's Avatar
Joined Aug 2005
2,407 posts
VIC, Australia
[MORE/SHARE]

I found a good one..

A photographer from a magazine was assigned to cover some bush fires. The magazine wanted to show some of the heroic work of the firefighters as they battled the blaze.

When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and take photos from the air. His request was approved, and arrangements were made. He was told to report to a nearby airport, where a plane would be waiting for him.

He arrived at the airport and saw a plane warming up near the gate.

He jumped in with his bag and shouted, "Let's go!"

The pilot swung the little plane into the wind, and within minutes they were in the air.

The photographer said, "Fly over the park and make two or three low passes so I can take some pictures."

"Why?" asked the pilot.

"Because I am a photographer," he responded, "and photographers take photographs."

The pilot was silent for a moment; finally he stammered, "You mean you're not the flight instructor?"

Post #14, Sep 26, 2005 19:19:46


Stop or I'll shoot!
CANON DIGITAL REBEL XT :cool:
http://nidz.net/camera​.htmexternal link

LOG IN TO REPLY
Desertraptor
Cream of the Crop
Desertraptor's Avatar
Joined Jul 2005
11,154 posts
Adelaide, Australia
[MORE/SHARE]

New MENSA Words . . . .


The Washington Post's "Mensa Invitational" once again asked readers to
take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
changing only one letter, and supply a new definition. Some of these
will put you on the floor! Here are this year's (2005) winners:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the
subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

2. Ignoranus: A person who is both stupid and an *******.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until
you realize it was your money in the first place.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows
little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte' : To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these
really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's
like, a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day
consuming only things that are good for you.

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when
they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after
you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into
your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in
the fruit you're eating.

Post #15, Sep 26, 2005 21:27:59


Peter
Canon 60D|40D|
Lens 10-22mm f2.8|50mm f 1.8|100mm f2.8 Macro

24-70mm f2.8L|70-200mm f4L|100-400mm f4.5-5.6L
Flash 430EX II
Telescope Skywatcher 600mm ED80 f7.5 GEM EQ3

LOG IN TO REPLY


LIST NEARBY THREADS
675,828 views & 5 likes for this thread
Whats Your Favourite Joke? (TOTALLY unrelated to photography)
FORUMS Community Talk, Chatter & Official Stuff The Lounge



NOT A MEMBER YET? CLICK HERE TO REGISTER TO FORUMS

CHANGE BODY TEXT SIZE FOR ALL THREAD PAGES
POWERED BY AMASS 1.0version 1.0
made in Finland
by Pekka Saarinen
for photography-on-the.net


SEND FEEDBACK TO STAFF  |  JUMP TO FORUM...  |  FORUM RULES


Spent 0.00756 for 6 database queries.
PAGE COMPLETED IN 0.03s
827 guests, 775 members online
Simultaneous users record so far is 3341, that happened on Dec 11, 2014
Latest registered member is rsnoeyink

COOKIES DISCLAIMER: By using this site you agree that some cookies will be stored on your browser. For unlogged users we store one session id cookie. For registered members we store (in addition to login session cookie) only cookies that are essential for required functionality, we do not store any personal tracking data in cookies or other browser's data storage methods.