Zillion posts of the baby photographer joke, tripod joke, Canon joke - Page 5

johnnybfan · 15th of November 2005 (Tue)

Quote:

Originally Posted by KevC

PhotosGuy: I don't get your joke :embarassed:

I didn't either. Was wondering what it meant. Guess I'm a little more dense than I thought.

PhotosGuy · 16th of November 2005 (Wed)

OK, say these aloud...
"Someday your prints will come".
"Someday your Prince will come".
I didn't expect that it would be that difficult! I guess that you just don't remember the old Disney movies.

Anteros · 16th of November 2005 (Wed)

Funny stuff.

Thanks for the laugh folks.

KevC · 18th of November 2005 (Fri)

Oooh. That must be a quote from the movie! Hehe. I didn't recognize it. Thanks for clearing that up =)

PhotosGuy · 18th of November 2005 (Fri)

Quote:

Oooh. That must be a quote from the movie!

I think it was the opening line from her song. It's the only dialog I remembered, so I guess I thought everyone else would remember it too!

Dante King · 18th of November 2005 (Fri)

LOL Photos Guy. Look like the generation gap has even smashed this ole classic. I loved it and with your permission will use it every chance I get.

zacker · 18th of November 2005 (Fri)

... photos guy..Ahhh just forget it. Some of us just arent as quick (or perverted, take your pick here)
lol.. i got it and it was funny.. the trick to reading online jokes?? read them out loud if you can... they'll cu,m to ya soon enough!
-zacker-

JohnnyG · 18th of November 2005 (Fri)

I loved the one about the surrogate father! I laughed out loud!

Thanks,

John

PhotosGuy · 18th of November 2005 (Fri)

Quote:

LOL Photos Guy. Look like the generation gap has even smashed this ole classic. I loved it and with your permission will use it every chance I get.

You don't need my permission. I ripped it from someone else!

robjim · 30th of January 2006 (Mon)

The Photographer

The Heberts were unable to conceive children, and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Hebert kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon".

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.

"Good morning madam. I've come to...."

"Oh, no need to explain. Come in," Mrs. Hebert cut in.

"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! My specialty is babies."

"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat."

After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"

Photographer - "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too. You can really spread out!! "

Wife - "Bathtub, couch, bed, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for my husband and me."

Photographer - "Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results."

Wife - "My, my, that's a lot of...."

Photographer - "Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure."

Wife (muttering)- "Don't I know it."

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus."

Wife - "Oh my god!"

Photographer - "And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with."

Wife - "She was difficult?"

Photographer - "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park; to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look."

Wife - "Four and five deep?" (eyes wide in amazement).

Photographer - "Yes, and for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate! Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."

Wife (leaning forward) - "You mean they actually chewed on your ....equipment?"

Photographer - "That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so that we can get to work"

Wife - "Tripod?"

Photographer - "Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold very long.

Madam? Madam? Good Lord, she's fainted!"

Scottes · 30th of January 2006 (Mon)

I think this makes the 7th time this has been posted, I think? Still funny though.

SezzySue · 16th of April 2007 (Mon)

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and
decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the
proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said,
"Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon."

Half an hour later, just by chance, a
door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to
make a sale. "Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to..."

"Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in,
embarrassed, "I've been expecting you."

"Have you really?" said the photographer.
"Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?"

"Well that's what my husband and I had hoped.
Please come in and have a seat".

After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where
do we start?"

"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in
the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And
sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out
there."

"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it
didn't work out for Harry and me!"

"Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good
one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot
from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results."

"My, that's a lot!", gasped Mrs. Smith.

"Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his
time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be
disappointed with that."

"Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled
out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a
bus," he said.

"Oh, my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at
her throat.

"And these twins turned out exceptionally well -
when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with."

"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.

"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her
to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four
and five deep to get a good look"

"Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes
wide with amazement.

"Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more
than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling
- I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush
my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I
just had to pack it all in."

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they
actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?"

"It's true, Ma'am, yes. Well, if you're ready,
I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away."

"Tripod?"

"Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest
my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long."

Mrs. Smith fainted.

timbernet · 16th of April 2007 (Mon)

Can't

Stop

Laughing!

Oh no.. boss is looking at me funny...

weka2000 · 16th of April 2007 (Mon)

Thats great

Radtech1 · 16th of April 2007 (Mon)

http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=94201
http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=90698
http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=69149
http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=64734
http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=26235
http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=24548

And today makes 7 (that we know of!)

16th of November 2005 (Wed)	#62
PhotosGuy Moderator Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: S. E. Michigan Posts: 64,338	Re: A joke to lighten your day OK, say these aloud... "Someday your prints will come". "Someday your Prince will come". I didn't expect that it would be that difficult! I guess that you just don't remember the old Disney movies. __________________ FrankC - 20D, RAW, Manual everything... Classic Carz, Racing, Air Show, Flowers. www.FrankCizek.com Find the light... A few Car Lighting Tips, and MOVE YOUR FEET! Have you thought about making your own book? // Need an exposure crutch?

16th of November 2005 (Wed)	#63
Anteros Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Toronto, Canada Posts: 114	Re: A joke to lighten your day Funny stuff. Thanks for the laugh folks.

18th of November 2005 (Fri)	#64
KevC Goldmember Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: to Posts: 3,154 IMAGE EDITING OK	Re: A joke to lighten your day Oooh. That must be a quote from the movie! Hehe. I didn't recognize it. Thanks for clearing that up =) __________________ Too much gear... take nothing but pictures .... kill nothing but time .... leave nothing but footprints

18th of November 2005 (Fri)	#66
Dante King "Cream of Corn" BurgerMeister Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: San Anselmo, California Posts: 9,134 IMAGE EDITING OK	Re: A joke to lighten your day LOL Photos Guy. Look like the generation gap has even smashed this ole classic. I loved it and with your permission will use it every chance I get. __________________ Dante I am not an Lcoholic. Lcoholics go to meetings! Gear List

18th of November 2005 (Fri)	#67
zacker Cream of the Crop Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Oxford, CT. Posts: 6,005 IMAGE EDITING OK	Re: A joke to lighten your day ... photos guy..Ahhh just forget it. Some of us just arent as quick (or perverted, take your pick here) lol.. i got it and it was funny.. the trick to reading online jokes?? read them out loud if you can... they'll cu,m to ya soon enough! -zacker- __________________ My Facebook, Friend me If you want!http://www.facebook.com/brokenfencephotography http://www.facebook.com/theanimalhaven?ref=ts

18th of November 2005 (Fri)	#68
JohnnyG Worthless twinkle toes fairy Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 3,719 IMAGE EDITING OK	Re: A joke to lighten your day I loved the one about the surrogate father! I laughed out loud! Thanks, John __________________ Canon EOS 5D Mark II, 100-400IS L, 24-105 L[color=black][font=&quot] IS, 50mm f/1.4, Canon 430EX/580EX II, Kenko 1.5X, Epson R1900, Manfrotto 679B Monopod, 3021BPRO tripod, 808RC4 Head, 486RC2 Ballhead

30th of January 2006 (Mon)	#70
robjim Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Nashville, TN Posts: 57	A little Humor The Photographer The Heberts were unable to conceive children, and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Hebert kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon". Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning madam. I've come to...." "Oh, no need to explain. Come in," Mrs. Hebert cut in. "Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! My specialty is babies." "That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat." After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?" Photographer - "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too. You can really spread out!! " Wife - "Bathtub, couch, bed, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for my husband and me." Photographer - "Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results." Wife - "My, my, that's a lot of...." Photographer - "Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure." Wife (muttering)- "Don't I know it." The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus." Wife - "Oh my god!" Photographer - "And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with." Wife - "She was difficult?" Photographer - "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park; to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look." Wife - "Four and five deep?" (eyes wide in amazement). Photographer - "Yes, and for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate! Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in." Wife (leaning forward) - "You mean they actually chewed on your ....equipment?" Photographer - "That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so that we can get to work" Wife - "Tripod?" Photographer - "Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold very long. Madam? Madam? Good Lord, she's fainted!"

30th of January 2006 (Mon)	#71
Scottes Trigger Man - POTN Retired Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: A Little North Of Boston, MA, USA Posts: 12,838	Re: A little Humor I think this makes the 7th time this has been posted, I think? Still funny though. __________________ You can take my 100-400 L away when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers. Scottes' Rum Pages - Rum Reviews And Info Finally, I have a Gallery! Follower of Fidget - Joined the cult of HAMSTTR©

16th of April 2007 (Mon)	#72
SezzySue Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Las Vegas, NV (Born and Raised in Detroit, MI) Posts: 1,388 IMAGE EDITING OK	Photographer Joke The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, "Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon." Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to..." "Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, "I've been expecting you." "Have you really?" said the photographer. "Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?" "Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat". After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?" "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there." "Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!" "Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results." "My, that's a lot!", gasped Mrs. Smith. "Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that." "Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly. The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus," he said. "Oh, my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat. "And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with." "She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith. "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look" "Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement. "Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in." Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?" "It's true, Ma'am, yes. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away." "Tripod?" "Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long." Mrs. Smith fainted. __________________ Sarah www.seibertphotography.com

16th of April 2007 (Mon)	#73
timbernet send a search party to Mount Hood Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 19,157	Re: Photographer Joke Can't Stop Laughing! Oh no.. boss is looking at me funny...

16th of April 2007 (Mon)	#74
weka2000 Is that a 300mm in your pocket? Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Auckland Posts: 20,148 IMAGE EDITING OK	Re: Photographer Joke Thats great

16th of April 2007 (Mon)	#75
Radtech1 Everlasting Gobstopper Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Trantor Posts: 6,236 IMAGE EDITING OK	Re: Photographer Joke http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=94201 http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=90698 http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=69149 http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=64734 http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=26235 http://photography-on-the.net/forum/...ad.php?t=24548 And today makes 7 (that we know of!) __________________ . . "I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble." – Helen Keller

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