Wedding Called Off

[Reminisce]

Ok so this morning, I get a call from my wife, who handles our scheduling and most of our bookkeeping, and she informs me that one of our weddings for this December was just called off this morning. The mother of the bride is a family member of my wife, and she's really cool, but they purchased a custom package from us, totalling almost $4k, and already paid the deposit months ago.
She mentioned to my wife's mom that she's so fed up that she isn't even going to try and recover any of the money shes put down for the wedding so far (22 grand so far), she just wants this guy out of their life and out of the house. Thats another story for another day, however....

My contract clearly has an item that states all deposits are non-refundable, yet I've never had a shoot, in all my time as a photographer, that was actually cancelled after the deposit was made. My question is, should I be worried anyway? $1800 is a lot of money, irregardless of how much money you have, and on top of that, she is a family member.

[TTk]

Originally Posted by Reminisce

Ok so this morning, I get a call from my wife, who handles our scheduling and most of our bookkeeping, and she informs me that one of our weddings for this December was just called off this morning. The mother of the bride is a family member of my wife, and she's really cool, but they purchased a custom package from us, totalling almost $4k, and already paid the deposit months ago.
She mentioned to my wife's mom that she's so fed up that she isn't even going to try and recover any of the money shes put down for the wedding so far (22 grand so far), she just wants this guy out of their life and out of the house. Thats another story for another day, however....

My contract clearly has an item that states all deposits are non-refundable, yet I've never had a shoot, in all my time as a photographer, that was actually cancelled after the deposit was made. My question is, should I be worried anyway? $1800 is a lot of money, irregardless of how much money you have, and on top of that, she is a family member.

If no refunds are in your contract then No refund, I'v had it twice in twenty years and kept the refunds, that's life..

[gardengirl13]

How close of a family member? Families and money don't mix well. But as she said she's not going to try to recover any money so I wouldn't worry until you need to.

[DSallee]

hmmm, tough call. Personally, I wouldn't worry too much about it because you do have it your contract on no refunds of deposits that she signed. However, if it is brought up, I would tell her that IF you can get that date rebooked then you will refund her deposit because she is a family member.

Dave

[photoPanda]

If you aren't keen to return the deposit but want to do something perhaps offer her credit towards some other sort of photography through you?

[sebmour]

If you contract states no refund then you have the power to enforce it. Now it all depends on your judgment if you should pay it back.

[EmmaRose]

Maybe a 50% deposit refund? If you're worried about rumors by word of mouth you kinda 'have' to give something back. That is if you live in a smallish area, not a big city with millions

[dwarrenr]

It's your decision. If it was not a family member I would not refund it. But if it is a family member of mine I would refund it all. But that is just me, and family means family to me. But again that is just me.

[airfrogusmc]

I only shoot commercial/advertising now but did high end medium format weddings for 20 years. I had two wedding cancel and both times I called the catering managers at the hotels to find out if indeed the wedding was cancelled. In both cases it was and I did return their deposits which were sizable. My contract clearly state no refunds on a cancellation.

Because of the way I treated both of those brides and their families I got both brides again several years later of course, their siblings, and one of the grooms and a couple of their friends.

Its your call. I did it because I thought under those two specific circumstances it was the right thing to do and I inadvertently wound up making 6 times over, maybe more, the amount of the original deposits. Those two deposits were together over 10K. Over 5K each so it wasn't chump change and this was over 12 years ago.

[griptape]

Originally Posted by DSallee

However, if it is brought up, I would tell her that IF you can get that date rebooked then you will refund her deposit because she is a family member.

Dave

This is probably how I would handle it. I mean that's the whole point of a deposit right? To keep you from losing money by booking someone which doesn't allow you to book someone else even in the event that they cancel. If it weren't family, that would be a different story.

[snails]

I don't think you have anything to worry about. Your contract says non-refundable and she doesn't seem interested in recouping the money.

However, mother of the bride is family of your wife. Meaning, it's family. Unless you are living hand to mouth, I'd return it.

Originally Posted by Reminisce

irregardless

is not a word. Sorry, but "regardless" is the word you are looking for.

[ndelacova]

Decmber seems a bit far away right now. She is a member of your wife's family which means there is a potential meet up sometime in the future. She will always remember your action one way or an another. This will have repercusions one way or another. My opinion, return the money. The wedding is canceled. She did not get rid of you to hire someone else.

[Reminisce]

Thanks guys, I'm actually pretty calm about it. I just have a feeling she is (mom) emotional and just wants this guy out of their lives. She's close to my wife's mom, and thats how we found out so soon, but I have a feeling she won't ask for it back, and if she does, we will probably fork it over, since she has done so much for us. I'll see what happens over the next coming days and keep you guys posted on what happens . I feel sorry for the guy though, my wife's family is HUUUGE and they don't take weddings lightly, hehe.

Originally Posted by snails

is not a word. Sorry, but "regardless" is the word you are looking for.

Irregardless is indeed a word, sir. While it is a non-standard word, it is a contradicting word, that I use sometimes out of habit. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/irregardless

[Morto]

Have you talked to your wife abouthis? Sometimes getting an opinion from your wife or husband may lead you to see this differently.

[suecassidy]

This is May, wedding was booked for December, it involves family. I'd offer up the refund given that she is close to the family. I'm sure she doesn't expect you to do that, which makes it an even classier gesture.