Approve the Cookies
This website uses cookies to improve your user experience. By using this site, you agree to our use of cookies and our Privacy Policy.
OK
Index  •   • New posts  •   • RTAT  •   • 'Best of'  •   • Gallery  •   • Gear  •   • Reviews
Guest
New posts  •   • RTAT  •   • 'Best of'  •   • Gallery  •   • Gear  •   • Reviews
Register to forums    Log in

 
FORUMS Photography Talk by Genre General Photography Talk 
Thread started 05 Feb 2007 (Monday) 22:14
Search threadPrev/next
sponsored links
(this ad will go away when you log in as a registered member)

Pictures of the deceased

 
daclozer
Goldmember
Avatar
1,027 posts
Likes: 1
Joined Jul 2005
     
Feb 07, 2007 19:41 |  #16

My 30 year old cousin passed away a few weeks ago in a tragic work accident. He wanted to be cremated so they didn't have funeral but his friends at work rented a banquet hall and held a very informal memorial serive for his friends and family to get together and celebrate his life. As soon as I walked in the door my uncle, his father, asked me if Ibrought my camera. I specifically brought my 30D and gear hoping that I would get a chance to shoot some pics of my family that are across the country. My cousins remains were not present, but I still felt a little weird about it at first. Pretty soon I had family members asking to get shots with other family members and his co-workers (both my cousin and his dad, my uncle, had worked with these guys for many years and were close) were asking for shots with his dad... I have a whole stack of email addresses to send shots to when I get through them all. It was a small gesture that was greatly appreciated by my family. The gist of my post is that if the husband wanted the shots, then the rest of the family has no business worrying about it. I am sure that it will mean a lot to him and he will appreciate you for doing it..


2 30D/BG-E2
70-200L f2.8 Canon
28-75mm f2.8 Tamron
www.freezeframefoto.bi​z (external link)
http://www.etsy.com/sh​op/freezeframefoto (external link)

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
sponsored links
(this ad will go away when you log in as a registered member)
MrsKitty
Goldmember
1,193 posts
Joined Nov 2005
     
Feb 07, 2007 20:19 |  #17

When my grandpa died, my father took pics of him in the coffin. He finished one roll of film then started another but there wasn't any shots of grandpa on the second role, only the first. When he changed film, one of the family members present managed to steal the roll that had just been shot. She objected to anybody taking any pics at the time but with him being the son, his wants went before hers. In the end, she won as she stole the film.

When my grandmother dies it won't be an issue. She will not be permitted in the funeral home as she steals something or manages to cause some sort of trouble any time she comes around :(

My point is, those pics meant a hell of a lot to my father. My grandmother didn't object to them being took so it was nothing to the cousin. Later, there was no way he could reshoot them because he didn't discover the film was missing until after the funeral.




  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
Mark_Cohran
Cream of the Crop
Avatar
15,646 posts
Best ofs: 1
Likes: 909
Joined Jul 2002
Location: Portland, Oregon
     
Feb 07, 2007 21:00 |  #18

misskitty5077 wrote in post #2672157 (external link)
When my grandpa died, my father took pics of him in the coffin. He finished one roll of film then started another but there wasn't any shots of grandpa on the second role, only the first. When he changed film, one of the family members present managed to steal the roll that had just been shot. She objected to anybody taking any pics at the time but with him being the son, his wants went before hers. In the end, she won as she stole the film.

When my grandmother dies it won't be an issue. She will not be permitted in the funeral home as she steals something or manages to cause some sort of trouble any time she comes around :(

My point is, those pics meant a hell of a lot to my father. My grandmother didn't object to them being took so it was nothing to the cousin. Later, there was no way he could reshoot them because he didn't discover the film was missing until after the funeral.

You know, there's always some a$$ who thinks their wants and desires should always trump those of everyone else.

Mark


Mark
-----
Some primes, some zooms, some Ls, some bodies and they all play nice together.
Forty years of shooting and still learning.
My Tumblr Site (external link) (NSFW)
Follow Me on Instagram (external link)

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
daclozer
Goldmember
Avatar
1,027 posts
Likes: 1
Joined Jul 2005
     
Feb 08, 2007 14:57 |  #19

True Dat !!!


2 30D/BG-E2
70-200L f2.8 Canon
28-75mm f2.8 Tamron
www.freezeframefoto.bi​z (external link)
http://www.etsy.com/sh​op/freezeframefoto (external link)

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
ByTheBrooke
Member
Avatar
137 posts
Joined Oct 2008
Location: Florence, AL
     
Jan 22, 2011 18:37 |  #20

I took pictures throughout my mother's entire funeral. She died unexpectedly at 53. I had plenty of pictures of her alive, but wanted to have those shots that I could go back to when my mood warranted. I asked my Dad about it before I did it. I felt he was the only person I needed approval from, and he actually wanted me to as well. I shot the flowers, got just a couple of quick shots of her in the casket and a shot of the casket from a distance, and a shot of the panel in the lid of her casket. I didn't spend much time shooting her, but then I made sure to get the flowers at the gravesite as well. I didn't care what anyone thought. she was MY mom, MY best friend, and my Dad was on board. I don't have the photos of her body displayed anywhere, and most days don't want to look at them. But they're good to have on those days that my heart is heavy with missing her, and I browse through ALL of the photos I have of her. She looked beautiful, and it doesn't pain me to remember her in that way at all.

Anyway, no, I would not feel bad. It really is a very personal thing that is between you and her husband. No one else matters. If they don't like it, they don't have to look at it.


Brooke
Gripped 7D, Sigma 30mm 1.4, Sigma 85mm 1.4, Canon 100 2.8mm Macro, etc etc.... I just love to shoot!

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
sam ­ walker
Goldmember
Avatar
1,932 posts
Likes: 1
Joined Jan 2006
Location: cleveland ohio usa
     
Jan 22, 2011 20:18 |  #21

My local newspaper The Plain Dealer started including photos in the obituary section 15 years ago. I do read the obits daily Not all survivors choose to include a pic with the notice Some that do furnish awful images that are rudely cropped or of bad resolution. Is there a market out there at funeral parlors of shooters who won't mind capturing an embolmbed face for publication? It must be a real problem for funeral directors I'd buy a 35MM lens and do it myself if the money was there. Thoughts,experience?
Sam


We'll rape the horses and ride off on the women
rebel xs 18-55is,55-250is promaster2500 flash

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
bokchoi
Member
167 posts
Joined Nov 2008
     
Jan 22, 2011 22:09 |  #22

I don't think I would have been able to go ahead with something like that, and I strongly commend you for following through and being there for your friend in his time of need.

For the rest of us, take more pictures and keep them close; you never know what shots you've missed until it's too late to go back.


Edit: I just realized this thread is 3 years old!




  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
ByTheBrooke
Member
Avatar
137 posts
Joined Oct 2008
Location: Florence, AL
     
Jan 23, 2011 00:10 |  #23

bokchoi wrote in post #11695464 (external link)
I don't think I would have been able to go ahead with something like that, and I strongly commend you for following through and being there for your friend in his time of need.

For the rest of us, take more pictures and keep them close; you never know what shots you've missed until it's too late to go back.


Edit: I just realized this thread is 3 years old!


Yeah, I drug up a few old posts :o I had done a search and had forgotten I did a search LOL so I was commenting on posts that came up in my search before I realized some of these posts were OLD. Oh well, can't hurt to revisit old subjects, can it?


Brooke
Gripped 7D, Sigma 30mm 1.4, Sigma 85mm 1.4, Canon 100 2.8mm Macro, etc etc.... I just love to shoot!

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
Gomar
Senior Member
Avatar
527 posts
Likes: 7
Joined Sep 2010
Location: NYC
     
Jan 23, 2011 10:36 |  #24

wow! how disgusting! If he wants to carry a photo of his dead wife in his wallet, or hang it on his car's mirror, or make a 20" portrait and hang it up above his bed, or keep it next to him in bed, well, that's his business. Let him snap away his dead wife in the coffin all he wants.
If I were you, I would run away... even further than if a friend asked me to shoot his wedding.




  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
Gomar
Senior Member
Avatar
527 posts
Likes: 7
Joined Sep 2010
Location: NYC
     
Jan 23, 2011 10:47 |  #25

sam walker wrote in post #2667251 (external link)
kind of goes back to the roots of photography. Some pretty gruesome pics as I recall.
Sam

Fine. However, did he ever give those photos to the parents of the men, or their wifes or kids? Kind of strange seeing your son or pa in the newspaper all mangled and shot up, and having that as the last image. I guess that's why showing photos of dead troops in Iraq and Afghanistan is forbidden.




  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
Gomar
Senior Member
Avatar
527 posts
Likes: 7
Joined Sep 2010
Location: NYC
     
Jan 27, 2011 18:40 |  #26

MrsKitty wrote in post #2672157 (external link)
When my grandmother dies it won't be an issue. She will not be permitted in the funeral home

oh, ok.




  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
Gedanken
Senior Member
741 posts
Joined Mar 2007
Location: Melbourne, Australia
     
Jan 27, 2011 19:09 |  #27

Gomar wrote in post #11697782 (external link)
I guess that's why showing photos of dead troops in Iraq and Afghanistan is forbidden.

Call me cynical, but I suspect the reason's more a matter of controlling PR than of respect for the dead.

I was watching a documentary called Photographers in the War Zone a few weeks ago, and an Iraqi photojournalist questioned why the press so freely published photos of dead Iraqis while photos of dead soldiers were banned. Speaking as a former soldier, I think the guy's got a very good point about the double standard.


Gear List

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
ByTheBrooke
Member
Avatar
137 posts
Joined Oct 2008
Location: Florence, AL
     
Jan 29, 2011 00:00 |  #28

Gomar wrote in post #11697731 (external link)
wow! how disgusting! If he wants to carry a photo of his dead wife in his wallet, or hang it on his car's mirror, or make a 20" portrait and hang it up above his bed, or keep it next to him in bed, well, that's his business. Let him snap away his dead wife in the coffin all he wants.
If I were you, I would run away... even further than if a friend asked me to shoot his wedding.

If you feel that strongly about it, that's fine, it's your choice. Don't look at the pictures. But who are you to say someone is sick or demented for wanting to document that part of their life? Do I keep my Mom's picture on the mantle? Nope... never even printed it since it was taken digital... but I have it, on a disc, to keep. It's a memory. A painful memory, but a memory nonetheless. What you say along these lines can REALLY hurt someone. Grief can play cruel tricks on someone's heart and mind. Being called "disgusting" in this time because of something as trivial as wanting a memory can really send someone over the edge. Might want to learn to get control of that tongue. Even if you were joking... do you think someone consumed with grief and doesn't know you would recognize your sarcasm, especially over the internet? Touchy subject, here... doesn't hurt to show respect to others instead of criticizing them simply because what they desire doesn't line up with what you think is kosher.


Brooke
Gripped 7D, Sigma 30mm 1.4, Sigma 85mm 1.4, Canon 100 2.8mm Macro, etc etc.... I just love to shoot!

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
bsaber
I have no idea what's going on
Avatar
3,536 posts
Likes: 2
Joined Aug 2007
Location: Los Angeles, CA
     
Jan 29, 2011 00:31 |  #29

I've been asked to shoot two funerals of relatives and when my friend's mother passed I offered. He found it a very odd and maybe even rude offer. It depends on each person's choice. If the husband asked you to do it then don't feel bad. So what if others didn't like it? Another friend of mine has already designated me as the "official" photographer for her funeral... and I'll do it. Some strongly disagree and that's fine.




  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
Bang ­ Bang ­ Boy
Goldmember
Avatar
1,347 posts
Joined Nov 2010
Location: South Africa
     
Jan 31, 2011 18:23 |  #30

I would have shot a picture of my grandfather if I would have brought a camera with me. Unfortunately all I had a year ago was a beat up non working FX.

I sat by his side for 16 hours after they pulled the plug on the life support. I was told he would pass away within the hour. Instead I spent an entire night with my old grandpa. Really wish I had some photos of him, now I try to document everything.

To the OP, you did the right thing.


Lots of old stuff but hey I am a student
Photojournalist in Johannesburg.

  
  LOG IN TO REPLY
sponsored links
(this ad will go away when you log in as a registered member)

4,922 views & 0 likes for this thread
Pictures of the deceased
FORUMS Photography Talk by Genre General Photography Talk 
AAA
x 1600
y 1600

Jump to forum...   •  Rules   •  Index   •  New posts   •  RTAT   •  'Best of'   •  Gallery   •  Gear   •  Reviews   •  Member list   •  Polls   •  Image rules   •  Search   •  Password reset

Not a member yet?
Register to forums
Registered members may log in to forums and access all the features: full search, image upload, follow forums, own gear list and ratings, likes, more forums, private messaging, thread follow, notifications, own gallery, all settings, view hosted photos, own reviews, see more and do more... and all is free. Don't be a stranger - register now and start posting!


COOKIES DISCLAIMER: This website uses cookies to improve your user experience. By using this site, you agree to our use of cookies and to our privacy policy.
Privacy policy and cookie usage info.


POWERED BY AMASS forum software 2.1forum software
version 2.1 /
code and design
by Pekka Saarinen ©
for photography-on-the.net

Latest registered member is suitman1
345 guests, 256 members online
Simultaneous users record so far is 6430, that happened on Dec 03, 2017

Photography-on-the.net Digital Photography Forums is the website for photographers and all who love great photos, camera and post processing techniques, gear talk, discussion and sharing. Professionals, hobbyists, newbies and those who don't even own a camera -- all are welcome regardless of skill, favourite brand, gear, gender or age. Registering and usage is free.