This article shows what an ass this guy was when it came to driving
Editors Note: Below is a piece that Ryan Dunn wrote for CC (Chester County Cuisine and Night Life) in 2009.
Ok, Ok, Ok … here we go, this rant is about YOU!!!
You don't know who you are because evidently, you’re an imbecile. You’re the forgettable human in front of me in the left lane, aka "passing lane,” that is way too oblivious to Earth to recognize your insignificance in the scheme of things. Not only are you an annoyance to everyone on the road behind you, but I assume a total let down to your immediate family and loved ones.
My only joy in life is the assumption that someone somewhere who is directly connected with you is in complete disapproval and embarrassment. I assume your parents have left much to be desired based on your imminent and obvious lowering of expectations. But I being a total stranger am eager to see you die in a truly disturbing, yet entertaining way.
Well, talk to me while your in traffic on your way to work, yelling at your windshield and punching your steering wheel like an idiot, all because some lifeless idiot can’t seem to muster up the thought process to recognize he’s not only useless, but affecting a good percentage of this town with his lack of point!!
Let me preface by saying, I’M A TERRIBLE DRIVER!!! Yet I can understand the concept of other people when it comes to commuting. I am what I like to refer to as a "race car driver," with that said; I’m an amateur driver in the Sports Car Club of America series (SCCA).
I consider myself a good /or very good track driver, yet on the road, I’m a d@#k! With that said I drive like a bat out of hell and while doing so, try and stay out of other people’s way and/or life. I may drive like a very large and extremely scary thing is chasing after me (or there is a very attractive case of beer on the horizon), but I don't affect other drivers while engaging in my very entertaining convenience. The human who, in his or her head, thinks that all lanes are created equal, can truly be run off the road in a fiery ball of flame.
You, single handedly, are creating all the traffic you are currently stuck in! If you were to get out of the way (while using your turn signal, which is a purchase option evidently ... that’s another story) and merge to the right/correct lane, we would all get to work on time, then out on time to hang with our significant others … or get to the bar in time to complain about our jobs, wives and most of all -- YOU!
I can only assume, you’re also the useless human who stops at the end of the onramp to "look both ways," my God, you are horrible in every possible way!!!! Do you think for a nanosecond, in your pea sized brain, that the state of Pennsylvania was just throwing away concrete and the most logical way to get rid of it was to create a meaningless merging third lane for no other reason than to park on the end of it looking stupid with a crowd of very disgruntled fans behind.
If I were a religious man, I’d currently be saying God bless you, but I’m not, and I’m asking in the most sincere way -- PLEASE DONT!! You’re not worth the blessing, whether theoretical or literal, you SUCK. And I’m saying right now, anyone in the car with you is worthy of an uncomfortable death as well.
There, I said it. Your welcome!