First all-Asian wedding - a complete disaster!

Owain Glyndwr wrote in post #12903060
I don't think the suggestion was to offer two different contracts right from the start but to have a second contract as a back-up ready to bring out of the drawer if the clients really insist on later payments.

Exactly. Most of the time, the terms are read and accepted w/o further discussion. A few want to change those, and it would be after discussing those changes that I would say "in cases like this, I use this contract..." and then they could review to see if it is to their liking, with the idea that the first contract will be more desirable. 2nd contract will have a higher deposit, as well as late fees, longer delivery date, etc...
but is just a work-in-progress at this time...

Yet another no-progress update....
received email from the out of town groom...
he is pissed that his bride tried to arrange payment. He is pissed that I accepted those arrangements as it is the not the arrangement he agreed to. And he's completely pissed that his father-in-law has been involved and makes him look bad....

Yup, that's the kind of guy I'm dealing with... makes payment arrangements, breaks them, and then is upset when I don't honor them...
or its part of their game...

I won't respond just yet. I'll forward his email to her... her response should be a clear indication on whether they are both playing me on this...

Has the video guy got his cash yet?

I'd put it to bed and only wake it up when they say "I have the cash in hand right now."

One last email to let them know that's the only reason you'll communicate further and that's it. No forum updates, no tit for tat emails, no touching (or deleting either) the images, nothing.

SMP_Homer wrote in post #12903209
Yet another no-progress update....
received email from the out of town groom...
he is pissed that his bride tried to arrange payment. He is pissed that I accepted those arrangements as it is the not the arrangement he agreed to. And he's completely pissed that his father-in-law has been involved and makes him look bad....

Yup, that's the kind of guy I'm dealing with... makes payment arrangements, breaks them, and then is upset when I don't honor them...
or its part of their game...

I won't respond just yet. I'll forward his email to her... her response should be a clear indication on whether they are both playing me on this...

What a way to start a new life. You just may be shooting the divorce soon. I wonder how many other things of this nature are going on right now with this family. Music, caterers, etc not paid.

I've been following since post #1....

I don't think you should forward the e-mail to the guy's wife... that just seems to be in poor taste.

At this point, I wouldn't worry about processing the images. I wouldn't worry about making contact.

Put the images in a folder on some spare HD space, and don't worry about them until payment is made in full. That's the only thing that matters is that payment is made in full. I'd communicate that to the bride and groom, and let that be it. No further communication is needed until payment is made in full. If payment isn't made, they don't get pictures. Plain and simple. You have wasted more time trying to secure payment than you ever should have. This whole situation isn't open for conversation.

Money = Pictures. Everything else, every other communication is a waste of time. Just the fact that you're responding to all of their various ridiculousness is you playing into their hands.

Stand firm. Do not respond to anything other than full payment.

hypnotic wrote in post #12903229
Has the video guy got his cash yet?

Nope.
And he's sent me a link to the completed videos (2 of them!)
Very nice work too.
He agrees that he and I will get paid, never thought originally that they would try to 'renegotiate' their payments by waiting us out, and won't accept any form of payment unless it's electronic, cash or certified.

You are wasting far to much time with these people. If they pay so be it, if not... move on. In your position I'd have better things to do than worry about them like... breathing for example.

va_rider wrote in post #12903248
I've been following since post #1....

I don't think you should forward the e-mail to the guy's wife... that just seems to be in poor taste.

Or it's a heads up to her that he's aware she went behind his back (assuming it's not part of their game)... as I said, I don't know if this is part of a game, or if she's truly trying to work this out behind his back... if he's pissed about it, I don't know what he may end up doing, and whatever happens, if she has an idea that he knows, she can better prepare for it (and while that happens, I hope he does nothing bad).

They're playing me, or I'm hopefully saving/preparing her for something worse down the line... either way, I don't see any poor taste here.

I don'y know if your just looking for attention on this site or this is really happening.

YOU ARE JUST MAKING A COMPLETE MEAL OF IT.

It's SIMPLE. Either He Pays & Get The Images OR He Doesn't Pay & Doesn't Get The Images.


TELL HIM HE IS WASTING YOUR TIME. WHEN HE IS READY TO PAY LET YOU KNOW AND YOU WILL DO THE IMAGES. UNTIL THEN CEASE ALL COMMUNICATION

dariussutherland wrote in post #12903325
I don'y know if your just looking for attention on this site or this is really happening.

Or maybe its an experience in his career as a professional photographer... something that is usually shared on this site, in detail, since thats what this site is about?

Money = Pictures. Everything else, every other communication is a waste of time.

This.

I'm not a professional, and I've never been in your shoes. But, I don't see any reason for you to correspond with them or even think about their pictures until you get paid.

Money = Pictures.

jmg181 wrote in post #12903335
Or maybe its an experience in his career as a professional photographer... something that is usually shared on this site, in detail, since thats what this site is about?

Well. That's a given, but what I mean is this is such a disastrous mess that is going on and on I can't quite believe it. The OP clearly is making this worse for himself and just prolonging it.

See mplezia comment too as I am with him.

jmg181 wrote in post #12903335
Or maybe its an experience in his career as a professional photographer... something that is usually shared on this site, in detail, since thats what this site is about?

I dunno why someone would think I'm an attention-whore all of a sudden...
Ya, I came here to vent... picked up a few things along the way, and there's more than enough in here for other wedding photographers, experienced or in training, to learn from... some have bashed me, some have praised me, but I'm not really keeping count - that's just part of posting on a forum.

mplezia wrote in post #12903349
Money = Pictures. Everything else, every other communication is a waste of time.

This.

I'm not a professional, and I've never been in your shoes. But, I don't see any reason for you to correspond with them or even think about their pictures until you get paid.

Money = Pictures.

I've told them via email that all payment needs to come in before pictures go out - repeatedly.
I've told her the same, in person when she dropped off her post-dated checks.

But if they communicate - I have to communicate back, even if it's just to remind them my position. I can't ignore them.