Ya I heard about being on the resort you get extra perks. We wont be staying on the resort though. I'm hoping I can at least stick around to get some decent shots without such huge crowds. I doubt they walk around to everyone asking if they are staying on the resort right? So I'm assuming I should be ok
Thank ya sir!
They won't bother you, they just won't let you go on any rides. The attendants check for room keys at the entrances to the rides. The downside is that the park will likely be incredibly packed. You're better off finding nights where the park is open relatively late but it's not extra magic hours. Another thing to keep in mind, on the rare occasion that they do extra magic hours at Epcot, they still close the monorail at the regular time. I found that out the hard way this last trip.
Personally, I usually just keep my tripod in the bottom of the stroller and bring it out for the fireworks. After that I'll keep it out.
This last trip we would take the girls to "club 626' (a stage area in Tomorrowland) and let them dance until they couldn't walk anymore, then I could walk around and shoot all I wanted. 
