Lets try and raise the level
In order to understand this tale a little knowledge of British Currency before decimalization is required.
The £ Pound was divided into 240 pennies
A small silver coin valued at six pennies existed; this was a sixpence and was colloquially known as a “Tanner”
The next coin was worth 12 pennies; this was a shilling and was colloquially known as a “Bob”
So a pint of beer which cost One shilling, and eight pence (sixpence and two pennies)
Would have been one and eight
Now to our saga, Jack was a strapping virile lad of 27 married to Linda who was equally passionate.
Unfortunately Jack has suffered an accident at work which resulted in a mild concussion and while he had fully recovered he had lost all sexual co-ordination, in short he had lost his rhythm and did not know what to do, as expected this was causing marital problems.
So Jack goes off to the Doctor and explains the problem, the Doc thinks for a minute ,and says I will refer you to a sex therapist he should be able to sort you out.
Jack goes to his first appointment after explaining his problem the therapist gives him a course of treatment.
Stand in front of a mirror, put a penny on your right shoulder and move the shoulder back and forth-do this for a week.
Week 2 as week 1 but put penny on left shoulder
Put a penny on each shoulder and move shoulders back and forth alternately.
Then come back and see me
Jack returns and demonstrates the movements.
Excellent says the Therapist, continue with the following exercises
Now get a sixpence and wedge this between the cheeks of your backside and thrust your backside back and forward.
Get an erection and put a shilling on the end of your erection and thrust back and forward
Do this every day for a week and then come back
Jack returns, the Therapist says right, now we will bring all the movements together and while you are doing this repeat mentally
So you retain co-ordination
Or if it’s easier
Penny, Penny, Tanner, Bob
Jack does as requested
The therapist studies these movements and says excellent you are now cured so go home and make Linda a happy lady
That night in bed, they decide to put this in effect with both of them saying
Penny, Penny, Tanner, Bob, -Penny, Penny, Tanner ,Bob, -Penny, Penny, Tanner, Bob
This goes on for a few minutes then “Oh F**k it” –One and Eight, one and Eight.