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Thread started 26 Sep 2005 (Monday) 09:27
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Whats Your Favorite Joke? (Please don't report bad jokes)

 
Hoof ­ Arted
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Oct 18, 2019 16:09 |  #8776

Deare$t Dad:
Am doing well in $chool. I'm making lot$ of friend$ and am $tudying very hard. I have lot$ of $tuff and can't think of a $ingle thing I need, $o plea$e ju$t $end me a $hort note becau$e I $imply want to hear from you.
$ent with all my love,
Your $tudious $on


Dear Son:
Even with the ecoNOmy being as bad as it has been, I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task and you canNOt study hard eNOugh. Still, NOthing pleased me more that to NOtice how inNOvative you are. I'm very hoNOred to say you could be GoverNOr some day.

Much love,
Your piaNO playing Dad




  
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john ­ crossley
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Oct 19, 2019 11:41 |  #8777

Q. What do you call 15 guys sitting around the T.V watching the Rugby World Cup?

A. The Wallabies.


It never ceases to amaze me how dense intelligent people are.
I’ve had more intelligent conversations with lobotomised amoebas.
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Jonzjob
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Oct 19, 2019 12:03 |  #8778

That's right and they will be watching from the other end next weekend when they meet England.

And what do you call 15 blokes sat on an aircraft looking unhappy?

A. The Irish team. :twisted::twisted::twisted:


My ambition for a good while is to grow old disgracefully. So far my wife tells me that I am doing really well!
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Hoof ­ Arted
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Oct 23, 2019 14:23 |  #8779

Grampa, what music did you like when you were growing up?
Led Zeppelin
Who?
Yeah, them too.
Huh?
What?
Who?
Yeah.




  
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Hoof ­ Arted
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Oct 23, 2019 14:23 |  #8780

Childhood injuries:
Hit in face with a baseball
Wrecked my bicycle
Fell out of a tree

Adult injuries:
Sneezed too hard
Slept wrong
Reached for something on a shelf




  
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Hoof ­ Arted
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Oct 23, 2019 14:24 |  #8781

When they make an omelet in France they use only one egg, because in France one egg is an oeuf.




  
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john ­ crossley
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Oct 26, 2019 05:08 |  #8782

Q. What do you call 15 guys sitting around the T.V watching the Rugby World Cup Final?

A. The All Blacks.


It never ceases to amaze me how dense intelligent people are.
I’ve had more intelligent conversations with lobotomised amoebas.
-. --- - .--- ..- ... - .- -. --- - .... . .-. -.. .- -.-- --..-- .- -. --- - .... . .-. -.. .- -.-- - --- . -..- -.-. . .-..

  
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kiwichris
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Oct 26, 2019 05:52 |  #8783

john crossley wrote in post #18950631 (external link)
Q. What do you call 15 guys sitting around the T.V watching the Rugby World Cup Final?

A. The All Blacks.

Don't think so mate :D


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Jonzjob
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Oct 26, 2019 06:27 |  #8784

kiwichris wrote in post #18950647 (external link)
Don't think so mate :D

I do :twisted::twisted:

19 -- 7 8-)8-)


My ambition for a good while is to grow old disgracefully. So far my wife tells me that I am doing really well!
https://johnamandiers.​wixsite.com/johns-w-o-w-1 (external link)
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kiwichris
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Oct 26, 2019 07:21 |  #8785

Jonzjob wrote in post #18950660 (external link)
I do :twisted::twisted:

19 -- 7 8-)8-)

I am actually not sure they would be watching it, if they lose. In truth it does not matter to me, one way or another. Silly to get so intensely emotional over what is really, just a game.


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kiwichris
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Oct 26, 2019 07:22 |  #8786

BIF ;-)a


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kiwichris
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Oct 26, 2019 07:31 |  #8787

kiwichris wrote in post #18950647 (external link)
Don't think so mate :D

It would seem the Kiwis are watching, well done England. Congratulations.


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Jonzjob
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Oct 26, 2019 10:48 |  #8788

They may as well watch it as they can't go home until next week. They might come 3rd ? Or 4th ??:-P

That was a fantastic game, for just a game (?) and didn't England do well against the 16 players on the Kiwi side. That includes the 'OFFICIAL' watching the TV in the lorry in the car park of course. :rolleyes:


My ambition for a good while is to grow old disgracefully. So far my wife tells me that I am doing really well!
https://johnamandiers.​wixsite.com/johns-w-o-w-1 (external link)
John.

  
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Hoof ­ Arted
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Oct 28, 2019 07:37 |  #8789

In The News: Woman Delivers 22 Pound Baby

The baby is reported to be healthy and should be walking in about a year.

Same for the mom.




  
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Hoof ­ Arted
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Oct 28, 2019 07:39 |  #8790

HUSBAND: Did you order 100 tennis balls from Amazon?

WIFE: No.

DOG: [pretends to read newspaper]




  
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Whats Your Favorite Joke? (Please don't report bad jokes)
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