Very good so far, time for a few zen jokes
Q, What is red and invisible?
A, No tomatoes
Q, What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Q, What do you call a blind deer?
A, No idea
Q, Whats the difference between a duck?
A, One of its legs is both the same.
A newlywed couple, a blind man, an Iranian mullah, a chicken, a used car dealer, Judith Regan, a proctologist, and a Hollywood starlet, along with a nun, a man who just received a gorilla brain transplant, two Hassidic Jews, a stuttering hotel clerk, and a can of Spam are riding in a compact car.
Suddenly, they hear a siren and a state trooper motions the vehicle to pull over. "License and registration," says the cop, "you've exceeded the legal character limit in this joke."
Q, Why are blonde jokes so short?
A, So men can remember them.
Q, Why do women go round in groups of three?
A, Cos if one of them leaves the other two will **** about her.
A hot air balloonist is taking a passenger for a flight and gets lost in low cloud, when the cloud clears they see a man walking across a hillside and call for directions.
Passenger "Hey you down there, where are we"
Hiker "You are in a hot air balloon about 100 feet off the ground moving southwest at about 8 miles per hour"
Passenger "You must work for a product support department"
Hiker "Wow you are right, how did you know"
Passenger "The information was correct but totally useless and you have wasted my time and not helped at all, you should have supplied better information and gotten us out of this problem"
Hiker "You must be a manager"
Passenger "You're right, how did you know"
Hiker "I gave you the information you asked for, yet I'm getting blamed for your problem"