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Thread started 26 Sep 2005 (Monday) 09:27
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Whats Your Favorite Joke? (Please don't report bad jokes)

 
Scottes
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May 09, 2009 20:09 |  #2176

bjordan wrote in post #7890197 (external link)
Hmm, (14,155 + 2009) * 365.25 * 24 = only 141,693,624 hours, not a billion. Did I mess up somewhere? I get at least 116,000 B.C. - Ice age.

1B / 365 / 24 gets me 114,155 - maybe just a typo on his part?


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bjordan
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May 09, 2009 20:58 |  #2177

Scottes wrote in post #7890521 (external link)
1B / 365 / 24 gets me 114,155 - maybe just a typo on his part?

I think so. I made a silly mistake though... added 2000 instead of subtracting! It would be around 112,000bc.


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bjordan
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May 09, 2009 21:02 |  #2178

Border Patrol catches a guy, but he begs and begs to stay in the U.S. So, they decide to give him an English test. They say, "If you can use three English words in a sentence, we'll let you stay. The words are: Green, Pink, and Yellow."

The man thinks for a full two minutes, and finally says, "The fon go Green, Green, Green, so I Pink it up and say Yellow!"


"...this was the destiny of our lives. A long time ago this was our future, looking now for a lost pomegranate at Big Sur." -R. Brautigan

  
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Citizensmith
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May 12, 2009 00:14 |  #2179

Roy Mathers wrote in post #7887195 (external link)
I bet you're a wow at dinner parties!

Only if I can annoy people by using Goggle. :)


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Citizensmith
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May 12, 2009 00:23 |  #2180

bjordan wrote in post #7890197 (external link)
The statement was past tense - so maybe the release was written in 1990 and they were accurate on that. However, it still wouldn't get within Jesus' lifetime.

Hmm, (14,155 + 2009) * 365.25 * 24 = only 141,693,624 hours, not a billion. Did I mess up somewhere? I get at least 116,000 B.C. - Ice age.

1000000000/24/365.25=1​14077 BCE (and a few weeks) so you are right and I am wrong. Definitely a typo, not sure what I typed wrong though. Late Pleistocene so like you said, icey time. Remember to over expose half a stop to compensate for all the snow.


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Citizensmith
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May 12, 2009 00:25 |  #2181

40d wrote in post #7889587 (external link)
My son (5) made this up:

Q. What do you say to a dinosaur on his birthday?
A. Aaarrrrggghhhhh a dinosaur - run away!!!!

I think I'll be telling that one to my kids. :D


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brecklundin
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May 12, 2009 01:01 |  #2182

Citizensmith wrote in post #7903993 (external link)
Only if I can annoy people by using Goggle. :)

Goggle? GOGGLE? What the heck is GOGGLE?  :p


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Tbirder
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May 12, 2009 01:04 |  #2183

brecklundin wrote in post #7904176 (external link)
Goggle? GOGGLE? What the heck is GOGGLE? :p

It's for people who search the Internet while underwater. :)


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Tbirder
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May 12, 2009 01:05 as a reply to  @ Tbirder's post |  #2184

Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny...


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bjordan
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May 12, 2009 02:07 |  #2185

What is long, green, slimy, and smells like bacon?

this one's kinda dirty... highlight below if you want the answer:

Kermit the Frog's finger.


"...this was the destiny of our lives. A long time ago this was our future, looking now for a lost pomegranate at Big Sur." -R. Brautigan

  
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Andy_T
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May 12, 2009 08:31 as a reply to  @ bjordan's post |  #2186

Donald Duck goes on a dirty weekend but forgets
his condoms, he calls down to reception, asks for
a pack of three.


Reception asks shall I put them on your bill?
Donald replies "Don't be f******ng stupid
I'll suffocate"....

***************

Best regards,
Andy


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Belmondo
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May 12, 2009 08:36 as a reply to  @ Andy_T's post |  #2187

Andy. You apparently didn't read the memo about duck jokes.....verboten. :wink:


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studiophoto.com.au
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May 12, 2009 08:47 |  #2188

bjordan wrote in post #7890688 (external link)
Border Patrol catches a guy, but he begs and begs to stay in the U.S. So, they decide to give him an English test. They say, "If you can use three English words in a sentence, we'll let you stay. The words are: Green, Pink, and Yellow."

The man thinks for a full two minutes, and finally says, "The fon go Green, Green, Green, so I Pink it up and say Yellow!"


Love it!!


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Guineh
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May 12, 2009 15:39 as a reply to  @ studiophoto.com.au's post |  #2189

bjordan wrote in post #7904382 (external link)
What is long, green, slimy, and smells like bacon?

this one's kinda dirty... highlight below if you want the answer:

Haha.. eeeeewwww


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Guineh
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May 12, 2009 15:40 |  #2190

Belmondo wrote in post #7905590 (external link)
Andy. You apparently didn't read the memo about duck jokes.....verboten. :wink:

Huh? why are duck jokes banned?


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