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Thread started 26 Sep 2005 (Monday) 09:27
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Whats Your Favourite Joke? (TOTALLY unrelated to photography)

 
pwm2
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Jul 20, 2013 18:19 |  #6076

Off-topic but just making me think about this old story - the sr-71 isn't the easiest of planes to try to intercept:
http://www.militarypho​tos.net …ve/index.php/t-65940.html (external link)
At that time, lots of the SAAB 37 Viggen specs where also classified.


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D. ­ Vance
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Jul 20, 2013 19:28 |  #6077

pwm2 wrote in post #16138309 (external link)
Off-topic but just making me think about this old story - the sr-71 isn't the easiest of planes to try to intercept:
http://www.militarypho​tos.net …ve/index.php/t-65940.html (external link)
At that time, lots of the SAAB 37 Viggen specs where also classified.

Wow, very interesting read. The Wikipedia article on the SR-71 is also pretty intriguing.

Hilarious story, BTW! :lol::lol:


I wonder if the video editors on The Titanic ever went, "Sorry, I can't right now. I'm busy synching the Titanic..."

  
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icopus
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Jul 20, 2013 19:34 |  #6078

Tiberius wrote in post #16138137 (external link)
....

Awesome!

IMAGE: http://www.vtxoa.com/forums/images/smilies/bowdown.gif
IMAGE: http://www.vtxoa.com/forums/images/smilies/beer3.gif

Seeking 'kill' record. Please refrain from replying to this thread for 24 hrs.
If you want fuzzy, my card is full of that.
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x_tan
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Jul 20, 2013 19:57 |  #6079

joeblack2022 wrote in post #16134456 (external link)
LOL, reminds me of this:

http://kotaku.com …et-a-better-pla-728449290 (external link)

:):D:lol::lol::lol:


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Ron ­ Bailey
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Jul 22, 2013 23:40 |  #6080

Cool story and very well written. Now....a couple of images to go with it and you got a winner!

Just went to the source and saw the photo. Winner!


http://www.ronbaileyph​otography.com/ (external link)

  
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krepta
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Jul 23, 2013 01:06 |  #6081

Tiberius wrote in post #16138137 (external link)
From SOURCE (external link)

[...]

Great story! Thank you for sharing it. :)


Alex | flickr (external link) | Gear & Feedback | Food! (external link)

  
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joeblack2022
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Jul 23, 2013 11:51 |  #6082

Tiberius wrote in post #16138137 (external link)
From SOURCE (external link)

pwm2 wrote in post #16138309 (external link)
Off-topic but just making me think about this old story - the sr-71 isn't the easiest of planes to try to intercept:
http://www.militarypho​tos.net …ve/index.php/t-65940.html (external link)
At that time, lots of the SAAB 37 Viggen specs where also classified.

Those were great reads, thanks! :D


Joel

  
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CameraMan
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Jul 24, 2013 09:41 |  #6083

Subject: Hell in Chemical Terms

The following is an actual question given on a university of Arizona
chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student.

The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it
with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the
pleasure of enjoying it as well

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic(absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:


First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at
which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no
souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at
the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can
project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are,
we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now,
we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law
states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the
same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until
all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year
that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take
into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two
must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already
frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen
over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore,
extinct..... ...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a
divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my
God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.


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Shampoo sounds like an unfortunate name for a hair product.
You're a ghost driving a meat-coated skeleton made from stardust, riding a rock, hurtling through space. Fear Nothing!

  
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Harm
I don't always post, but when I do, I drink Dos Equis....
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Jul 24, 2013 14:24 |  #6084

A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.

“Amazing,” he thought as he flew down I-95, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State Trooper, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, “What am I doing? I’m too old for this!” and pulled over to await the trooper’s arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked up to the Corvette. He looked at his watch, then said, “Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason for speeding – a reason I’ve never before heard – I’ll let you go.”

The old gentleman paused then said, “Three years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back.”

“Have a good day, Sir,” replied the trooper.


SmugMug (external link)

  
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Calicajun
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Jul 24, 2013 15:41 as a reply to  @ Harm's post |  #6085

Love that Trooper joke.
A friend of mind was pulled over doing 95 MPH on his way to Las Vegas, NV. The officer asked to see his pilot's license, he pulled out his commercial pilot's license and handed it to the officer. The officer gave him back the license and say please slow down and have a nice day. True story.


Remember, Stressed spelled backward is Desserts.:)
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Harm
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Jul 24, 2013 16:03 |  #6086

^ Now that is funny


SmugMug (external link)

  
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20droger
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Jul 24, 2013 16:23 as a reply to  @ Harm's post |  #6087

Another true story.

Many years ago, I lived in California and belonged to the Sheriff's Rescue Posse. The Posse went looking for and rescued people lost in the desert or mountains wildernesses.
One of the "fringe benefits" of belonging to the Posse was a large sherriff's emblem (modified six-pointed star) that was affixed to the back of our vehicle.

I can't tell you how many times, when I was exceeding the speed limit, I was passed by cops who just smiled and waved.

Professional courtesy and all that.




  
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Ricardo222
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Jul 24, 2013 18:16 |  #6088

CameraMan wrote in post #16149587 (external link)
Subject: Hell in Chemical Terms

....

'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

That is both clever and very funny. Thanks for sharing!


Growing old disgracefully!

  
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thomascanty
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Jul 25, 2013 02:37 |  #6089

Sighting in your rifle with only two shots: LINKY (external link)


My name is Lonnie, but I answer to Thomas too.
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"Young at heart. Slightly older in other parts."

  
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Calicajun
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Jul 25, 2013 08:22 as a reply to  @ thomascanty's post |  #6090

Good one, from one old fool to another.:lol:


Remember, Stressed spelled backward is Desserts.:)
Suggestions welcome.
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Whats Your Favourite Joke? (TOTALLY unrelated to photography)
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