Whats Your Favorite Joke? (Please don't report bad jokes)

NixEre wrote in post #19061793
Try swallowing some disinfected ants ...

I'd rather swallow de-odour ants!

Enough!, I'm sycophants.

kiwichris wrote in post #19062266
Enough!, I'm sycophants.

Crazy jumbo!

I came up with one last night. My wife and I were talking about keeping up our daily walks to keep in some type of shape since the gym is closed.

I said I need to lose my winter weight, from the last 10 winters.

Did you hear about the guy who lost 250 lbs of ugly fat in one day?

His wife left him.

My wife called me today from town
"Pack your bags, I won the lottery"
Me " Wauv thats amazing dear, where are we going?"
" I dont care as long as youre gone when I get home"

The bartender says, “We don’t serve time travelers in here.”

A time traveler walks into a bar.

I told my suitcases that, due to the Coronavirus, I wouldn’t be using them this year.
I’m now dealing with emotional baggage.

What do I know about bonsai trees? Very little.

Pippan wrote in post #19064811
I told my suitcases that, due to the Coronavirus, I wouldn’t be using them this year.
I’m now dealing with emotional baggage.

Wow!

That shows just how attaché'd they can become

Pippan wrote in post #19064811
I told my suitcases that, due to the Coronavirus, I wouldn’t be using them this year.
I’m now dealing with emotional baggage.

Jonzjob wrote in post #19064902
Wow!
That shows just how attaché'd they can become

should just stick to briefcases
lesson the pain

Let’s bet on the best bag :
Duffel or quits!

Just a couple more alternative meanings?

Diode. - a Welsh poem

Don Juan. - the present US president has been re-elected

Transmission. - sex change

There was a very old, respected and traditional Japanese family who had 3 daughters.

the daughters were talking about marriage one day and the elder of them stated that she, being the oldest and therefore most prestigious wanted to marry a man with 3 dragons tattooed on his chest. This would indicate his prowess, strength and courage was in the highest order.

the second sister stated that as the second daughter she was not as prestigious as her beautiful older sister and that she could only possibly try to marry a man with 2 dragons on his chest.

The younger sister, quite different from the other 2, always chewing gum, smoking joints, piercings where ever possible, black leather and frequently drunk stated that as the younger sister she couldn't possible rise to 2 dragons when she married, but that she wanted a man with one draggin on the floor.

Pleased to say I got one of those two jokes !

Jonzjob wrote in post #19065015
Just a couple more alternative meanings?

Diode. - a Welsh poem

Don Juan. - the present US president has been re-elected

Transmission. - sex change