First all-Asian wedding - a complete disaster!

dariussutherland wrote in post #12903415
Well. That's a given, but what I mean is this is such a disastrous mess that is going on and on I can't quite believe it. The OP clearly is making this worse for himself and just prolonging it.

See mplezia comment too as I am with him.

How am I prolonging this? I tried to shorten the whole thing by getting paid on the day of the wedding, but that offended the groom
What's prolonging things is the couple. They either can't pay or don't want to pay. They know my position, it's been given to them repeatedly, but they keep trying...

Not trying to bash you at all. There's enough bashing in this place already. It just seems dragged out.

You don't have to commnicate with them in any way.

It's called taking control of the situation.

You state...That once payment is made, you will proceed with the pictures and they will receive them in x days and you stick to that. You also communicate that there will be no further communication on your part until you deliver the pictures.

You then ignore all emails. If they call you state the above and politely hang up. Opening the lines of communication is just dragging this whole thing out. It's your game tho, if you don't find it frustrating just continue the way you have been.

dariussutherland wrote in post #12903477
Not trying to bash you at all. There's enough bashing in this place already. It just seems dragged out.

You don't have to commnicate with them in any way.

It's called taking control of the situation.

You state...That once payment is made, you will proceed with the pictures and they will receive them in x days and you stick to that. You also communicate that there will be no further communication on your part until you deliver the pictures.

You then ignore all emails. If they call you state the above and politely hang up. Opening the lines of communication is just dragging this whole thing out. It's your game tho, if you don't find it frustrating just continue the way you have been.

I have a hard time hanging up on people, especially 'politely'. They have to swear at me or threaten me before I hang up. If they communicate, I won't ignore, but I will hold my grounds and just repeat.
As per my lawyer friend, if I choose to completely ignore them, and we end up in front of a judge, they will pull on that loose thread - the minute I ignore them, they will say they were trying to reach me to make payment, and I ignored them.
I don't have to answer the call. I don't have to reply to the email the minute it comes in, but if they leave a message to call them back, I should make sure those are all handled in a timely manner...

dariussutherland wrote in post #12903477
You don't have to commnicate with them in any way.

Just my .02, but I believe he does need to keep the lines of communication open. Otherwise, they could possibly go to court with "he will not respond to our email, phone call, etc." and will end up screwing him even more. Give them a response, however brief.

I'd recommend keeping a log of all the phone calls you've had with the date, time, length of call and summary of conversation, just in case this does end up in court.

D Thompson wrote in post #12903570
Just my .02, but I believe he does need to keep the lines of communication open. Otherwise, they could possibly go to court with "he will not respond to our email, phone call, etc." and will end up screwing him even more. Give them a response, however brief.

Exactly!
What my lawyer friend explained is that any communication attempt by the couple is an opportunity for them to resolve this. If I ignore their calls and emails, I'm ignoring potential resolution. We all know that the next communication attempt is most likely not going to resolve anything, but the minute I don't answer the phone or respond to emails, they will be saying all those attempts were there to make good, and put the blame back on me. By not ignoring them, I'm piling up a large amount of data that shows we communicated, and they never came close to resolution. AKA - better for me (should this see a judge)

Well...I am not a lawyer but if it were me in this country and I had a similar time.

I would send a recorded delivery letter, and an email of the same letter. Stating whatever I need to state and also that I there will be no further communication until monies are paid as per the contract.

What is there to communicate with these people or them you. You have the pictures, they have your money. If he pays they get the pictures. You state your position and that is it.

You are IMO just weakening your positions by constantly communicating with them. There is no deal to be struck here, hwo can there be, they have proven to be less than trustworthy already. Just my opinion...Time For Judge Judy Methinks

What is the resolution may I ask.

Will you be striking some kind of deal e.g he pays half, you deliver the pictures then he pays the rest. There is no resolution apart from him paying you the money?

Is there??

SMP_Homer wrote in post #12903614
By not ignoring them, I'm piling up a large amount of data that shows we communicated, and they never came close to resolution. AKA - better for me (should this see a judge)

I think I'd not only keep copies (backup) of all emails received/sent, but the voice messages as well. You may even want to record any phone conversations, but I believe you have to advise them it is being recorded first. There is a way to do that on most answering machines, just be sure to advise them first.

pwm2 wrote in post #12902621
What specific reasons do you have for suggesting that he sues? That it is possible? Or do you have more specific reasons, based on real evaluations of costs, probabilities of outcomes etc?

It is definitely within his right to sue. He performed his part of the contract, at least in part, they failed to perform theirs at all, he has the right to sue for performance. He spent time taking the photos, and has the right to be compensated for that time.

Whether or not it is the right thing to do morally or economically however, is a different story.

dariussutherland wrote in post #12903652
What is the resolution may I ask.

They come to their senses, bring me a check for payment in full, and I get these images done and be done with it. They already know that they missed their window for me to get these done quickly - even if they brought me an envelope full of money, I have limited time to apply to this wedding between now and the end of September. Now, a lot of that already booked time in August and September is 'estimated time' (i.e. how much time each wedding will need for edits, etc..) and I'll probably end up freeing time as the weeks go by. And on the flipside, something might come up that needs more time than anticipated. October just takes me out of the estimated time needed period...

dariussutherland wrote in post #12903652
Will you be striking some kind of deal e.g he pays half, you deliver the pictures then he pays the rest. There is no resolution apart from him paying you the money?

Those terms is what they asked for... I gave in, and gave them those terms, but they failed, so now it's pay in full before I look at the pics to edit them.

This sure does make me think about contract writing, clauses, and schedules in general for events...

cdifoto wrote in post #12903242
I'd put it to bed and only wake it up when they say "I have the cash in hand right now."

One last email to let them know that's the only reason you'll communicate further and that's it. No forum updates, no tit for tat emails, no touching (or deleting either) the images, nothing.

What! No forum updates!? That's the worst advice in this thread

nathancarter wrote in post #12903805
What! No forum updates!? That's the worst advice in this thread

Funny!
I've had a few PMs already today asking me to ignore those that think I'm looking for attention or want no further updates...

cdifoto wrote in post #12903242
I'd put it to bed and only wake it up when they say "I have the cash in hand right now."

One last email to let them know that's the only reason you'll communicate further and that's it. No forum updates, no tit for tat emails, no touching (or deleting either) the images, nothing.

I agree.

And I wouldn't forward his mail to her. Either they are in on it, in which case there isn't any meaning with posting it. Or they are in agreement on it, in which case you are creating more internal aggressions.