Quick shoot for a friend.

Let me know what you guys think!

1

While the lighting in the pictures are excellent,the composition is off.

Lighting is good...
1st pic composition is off
2nd pic Im liking it. Looks prolific

whoty wrote in post #12936849
the composition is off.

Tell him why then!

David

Woodworker wrote in post #12937229
Tell him why then!

David

Oh don't even, David...you should really be the one to talk.

#1 the light is beautiful, but the girls is on the left and looking out of frame. This has the effect in my eye of keeping my entire focus hammered to the left side of the image. The right side is just a blank empty void that serves no purpose. A portrait crop might help this, but then it might place her too much in the center.

#2 talking about too much in the center...She is centered. Not only that, her hair has been brought forward and slants towards the center. Not only that, but her arms are straight down and even slightly angled in towards the center. She's looking directly at the camera which is really making her jaw line more plump (compare jaw line with #1). Everything is slamming me in towards her neck and upper chest. After all of this my eye still yearns to look out into the rest of the picture and is instantly drawn to the light flower/leave in the upper right.

FYI...Although there are always exceptions to the rule, having a model pointed straight at the camera is not the best position. Also having everything equal is not best. Also having both arms the same and straight down is not the best. Also having the head looking straight at the camera and the same angle as shoulders is not best.

For me there is just too much uninteresting background that does nothing for the young lady. The pose is rather strange in a night shot (and I agree with Kechar).
The 2nd would be much better in portrait...but the dead centre symmetry makes it look like passport photo.

1- i like it but the trees are distracting... and i think the subject is too far. the light is excellent by the way !

2- im not a fan of the second, center, direct shot like this, it s not an advantage for the model ( again it s my own opinion)

critics are always easy... great job on the light ( and it s not the easiest thing in photography), i think on this 2 photos, the problem is more about composition

Great C&C guys! This is really helpful because I'll be going to Hawaii in just a few days and my cousin loves to model for me. I've actually read enough C&Cs off other people's posts to know that my composition in these pictures are poor, yet I still chose to take the picture that way for some dumb reason. Posing was extremely difficult for me. Well it wasn't just difficult. I just didn't have a clue how to do it. I'm glad to hear at least that my lighting was okay. This is my first time shooting a model (that's not my cousin) and it was rather challenging. Communication was difficult, we had very little time (we had like half an hour), and everything was just much harder than I had expected. She didn't like the photos at all due to the fact that the photos were unflattering (as Kechar mentioned). Thanks a ton for the C&C so far guys!

the second is bullseyed