YN-565 vs Canon 430II vs Canon 580II with E-TTL

I've a question for people who own at least two of the speedlites above.

Last year I bought a YongNuo 565EX and liked it very much. It works fine and does the job pretty good. Till I had to use E-TTL. The flash was extremely hard in almost every situation. I used exactly the same settings as a friend of mine with exactly the same combo (5DII and 24-70) but he had a 430EXII. His pictures came out pretty good instantly. Mine where just wrong with the huge amount of flash.

That was almost the first time I used the E-TTL mode so I am a beginner in this aspect. Last week I used the E-TTL again at a nice wedding. But everything is not as I would like to see. Even after I adjust the settings. I managed to get the picters come out pretty good, but I just can't shoot on pure E-TTL

Is it me that is wrong?
Is the E-TTL in the YN flash not that great?
Is the E-TTL in the Canon flashes (much) better?

I am looking for a second (backup) flash. And like to stick with a cheaper brand like YN. But if the E-TTL on a Canon Speedlite is much better....

I've got a 565ex and 2 550ex Canon flashes and ETTL behaves the same with both. Are you sure you don't have different settings on the cam or flash? Have you tried his flash on your camera and vice versa?

Yes I did. And used exactly the same settings. His flash was not that hard indeed.

I really thougt E-TTL is a sort of lazy mode. Because everything will be done for you. But maybe I am wrong.

So I can buy a second 565? There will be no big difference between the E-TTL modes?

MY 565 AND 580 Performed very similarly. the 565 performed better than my 2nd shooters 430ex II

Where is the FEC set on both your camera and flash?
What were the FEC settings of your friend on both devices?
Just saying that your settings matched his does not tell us much. The actual settings might help.