mono experimenting

some feedback on this would be appreciated...

Byte size: ZERO | Content warning: NOT AN IMAGE

Um, ok, here goes.
I'm not sure what you were going for with this photo.
As a portrait, it breaks a few fundamental rules. You are way, way too close, using too wide of a lens. Your low point of view makes it worse..she looks intimidating from that angle. The lighting is very flat, and too much on her "shiny spots". Odd angles of wood coming out of her head in the background are distracting.
Her expression looks more of surprise than comfort.
She's a pretty woman, I've seen other pictures of her, so let's take piks that flatter her.
Use your lens at least at 50mm or higher. Turn your flash off and put her by a window with an uncluttered background, and make her feel at ease about having her picture taken.
Looking forward to seeing your next shots....
Mike

Do not show her this photo. It is not flattering at all.

Thanks for that Mike, it was basically an experiment with getting the colour into the eyes, but your advice is very welcome.

This is intiminating..... put it in my bathroom I'd be shxtless....

I say have more contrast, have her mouth close, stronger the shadow, soften the shot and sharpen the eyes than give it another try.

Maybe it would be helpful to state what you are working on when you post a photo for critique. I guided my comments to the general overal photo. If "it was basically an experiment with getting the colour into the eyes", as you said, I wouldn't have given you the same critique...actually I probably wouldn't have given a critique at all, as I'm colorblind and I have no idea what you have done to her eyes.
Anyways, just my thoughts.

you're right of course...I didn't think to add that...