Funerals and pictures and processing

This is a clearly not a wedding situation but I thought I would relay what just happened to me this past weekend.

I good friend of mine, that I went to highschool with, along with his older brother, had their father pass away. I also know my friend's wife well so I decided to ask her if she would like me to take some photos, if I was able to do so very discretely, as it may be something that years from now would be very appreciated. She responded yes but that his mother would not want any of her taken.

I brought my long lens but left the bag in the car for the funeral service and also asked the funeral people for their permission (which they said to ask the family) and then I also got more approval from the older brother - who I also know.

The burial was a good distance away so we had a 30 minute car ride. The cemetery is a 'newer' one so there is a lot of open area without big trees to hide behind. When we arrived (all the cars pulling up in the section where the burial was to happen), I got out and still left my gear in the car as I really was not comfortable but I saw a very large statue about 150 yards from where the burial was to happen. As I was walking the older brother saw me and actually waved to me that it was ok and to not go that far but I wanted to be as far as possible so I acknowledged him but kept walking.

I grabbed my very small gear bag that looks like a man purse with no gear showing and slowly started walking to the area where I could hide away from the site. I brought my 7D2 with a 100-400II with a 1.4x attached and I also had the 24-105 in the bag. Because of the location and that I further tried to hide behind branches to that I was completely hidden I missed the first few shots (branches in the way) so they are not perfectly clear.

In terms of editing the images, I used LR, I tried to underexpose the surrounding areas of interest and for each picture, if I decided it was worth keeping and in spirit of what the family would appreciate, I used a variety of filters to emphasize the subjects that I wanted emphasized.

I delivered 35 pictures. The wife of my close friend loved them and asked how other family members could buy them. As I asked them if I could do this (I wanted to do it for them), I declined to sell them as it was my gift to them.


So, funeral pictures - what are your thoughts overall? - I wasn't willing to change my location under any circumstance so my view was my view - thoughts? of the processing?

Images are all mostly cropped - some small some not so small. The closeups of the casket are 24-105 the rest are 100-400II with the 1.4x


Thanks

Paul

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We treat death strangely in the West. I think you'll have some who say it's weird and others who would like to have the memories. Death is a part of life. I don't think that documenting it is strange. It's one more thing, in a long line of things, that bonds us together as human beings.

Under the constraints, looks like you did well. I personally would have lightened up a little on the vignetting, but that's personal taste.

I'm for funeral photos. I believe in documenting life as much as possible. Think of anything that you would like to remember years down the road; you need to photograph that! Whatever it is. Photos are the best way to remember. Especially as our memories become more crowded and strained. It's nice to look back and see how it actually was.

I like these. Slightly over-processed for me, but still good. I think B&W ones would be great for this!

BlakeC wrote in post #17571966
I think B&W ones would be great for this!

I went in thinking b&w all the way. I tried it on a few different pictures and it was never as good as I wanted it to be - so I kept reverting back to colour until I found this oversaturated look that I liked for some reason on these pictures; and, I didn't use vignetting per say but I was using radial filters to bring focus to what I wanted and then found the right sliders on each picture to de-emphasize the rest.

The one with the little boy looking at the head stone is just a wow kinda photo. Totally priceless well done. Would of been nice to have something like those when my old man passed.

#3 is interesting. Captivates the attention.

I first took funeral pics of my wife's Grandmother (her family requested), and then my Mom's. 5 or so years later I shot my Dad's and his sister. They were the last of their generation of the family.They just happened to pass away just a couple hours apart for unrelated reasons. We had separate funerals, hours apart but nearby.

Don't be so hesitant is shooting a funeral. There are many beautiful moments, flowers, items of remembrance on display. Funerals are inherently sad events in relation to the loss; but can also be quite joyful for many, when at peace with life events. Photography can capture these moments quite tastefully. I shoot far less images at a funeral and do half of them by arriving early. Shooting from far away, may actually draw more attention upon you. Simply stepping back 20 or 30 foot behind the crowd may suffice.

I would simply distribute images by sharing a Flickr link if that works for you. i made little books one time, but don't think I ever mailed them out. When I come across the images, it is always an insightful and meaningful moment and I treasure that!

I have actually shot several funerals. In other cultures this is very normal and was asked by a close friend of another culture. I got the chance, and I don't want to say fun, cause its a very sad time for the family. But I think I was able to capture some shots that will look back on and appreciate them. Often times you see people that you haven't seen in years, and its a good time to capture them as well. I respect the family/church, but just did as they wished. I was able to get closer and basically had free reign to go and do what I needed to do for them. I feel like it was a privilege and glad I was able to do them. I have also taken pictures at my own family and glad I did. DEATH is a part of LIFE. Regards

If a family asks for photography services at a funeral, then what is there to have an opinion about, right? However, if a guest decided to start taking pictures on their own behalf, I would consider that nothing less than disrespectful.

Of course every culture has their own ways of doing things, but at a funeral/wake, I personally would not feel comfortable with a camera in my face or a camera in my hand. It's a time when people should be able to grieve and express their feelings. People are extremely vulnerable in these circumstances and I could only guess that most people wouldn't want to be photographed as they are grieving.

With that said, taking pictures of the funeral details such as flower arrangements, picture boards, tombstones, and casket are much less intrusive to the grieving process of each individual. Taking pictures of the corpse?...well, I would actually prefer to be alive in my last known photograph

Yes, I would be uncomfortable taking pics of someone grieving. Sometimes, funerals are a great reunion for a family and a happy occasion for some. Pics of happiness or joy from such may be fine, especially if they gesture/ask you to do so. I have done pics of the deceased and they were well received. It is very much a personal decision and influenced heavily by one's relationship to all involved. Most if not all, done privately.

Great images, Paul.
With all the families are going through, it can be very hard to remember the details, the people who came to pay their respects, ect.

I have a somewhat unique perspective on taking funeral photos. I work for a smaller family owned and operated funeral home. One of the services we offer to our families (free of charge), is to take photos of the memorial/graveside. Out of the 1k+ families we serve every year, I can only recall a handful of times that it was requested that we do not take photos. And more often then not, individual members of the family will request more copies of the images then the 2 we initially provide.

IMHO, in our region (the PNW), funeral photos are very acceptable.

I agree with your stance on giving the photos to the family vs. selling them as you asked to do this. If a family approached you and enquires about your services, that would be another story.

Just my $.02.