When you have no friends to take pictures with...

The joke used to be that the lake froze over and the ducks flew the lake to Alabama.

Xyclopx wrote in post #17718042
And so now here I am writing....... cause I think I seriously need to meet some folks as crazy as I am. Some artsy fartsy types would be awesome! I'm an engineer, and I work with a bunch of science and math types, and all my friends are science and math types. I don't have too many... say chef friends... , or extremely few designer friends (I think just 1 or 2), and absolutely ZERO artist type friends, and absolutely zero writers, etc.

Now, I realize there are some steps to take to fix this. And I've tried a little. Join photography meetups. Maybe attend some art shows at galleries. I did try do some meetups, but didn't really make any friends that were serious enough. Then I got too busy. I think I can do better, and try a lot harder. And it'll probably work. Can probably make a few friends for sure....

Anyone feel the same way? Make any new art/photography friends?

Just last month I joined a local artist's club - Okanogan County Artists. I joined for the very same reasons you cite; a lack of local friends who are seriously involved in the arts.

Most of the artists there at the club are painters, so it's not like I am meeting people to go out and shoot with. But I am getting to know people who are interested in art; composition, form, texture, light......all the stuff that matters most, regardless of the medium used.

So, maybe skip the photography club thing and go right for an art club instead? It might be a great way to meet the "artsy friends" that will inspire you and regenerate your waning interest.

This thread makes me think I am one of the strangest people on the planet. Other than my wife, I tend to associate with nobody on a regular basis. Not even family. We do the obligatory birthday and holiday stuff, but if it were up to me, I'd pass. I work in an intimately personal environment which is usually jam-packed with emotion. When I am away from that, I prefer to be alone, my wife being the sole exception. She feels the same way.

Don't get me wrong, I love people. I couldn't do my job if I didn't. I can talk to the anyone about anything, for hours. Given enough time, most people reveal idiosyncrasies I'd just rather not deal with. I have no problem with strangers, or clients. Why? Because I don't know them well enough to smoked off by their peculiarities.

I tried Facebook, for about 3 days. I found it a total and complete waste of time. I don't carry a cell phone. I define 'friend' as someone who will do what you need done (within the law) when you need it done. Everyone else is an acquaintance, or a stranger. By that definition, the only friend I have is my wife.

Photography fits my lifestyle perfectly. It is something I can do by myself, for myself, and be happy with that. My wife hangs a lot of my photos around the house, and shares them on her Facebook. I like that, but it is hardly essential. I do it for myself. The same goes for my piano playing. Very few people have ever heard me play. Again, my wife being the big (oops!, don't tell her I said that ) exception.

I don't care what anyone else thinks of my photography or my piano playing, or just about anything else. The seemingly quite human need for external validation completely escapes me. I do understand sharing something with someone and having them appreciate whatever it is. What I don't get is the need for that sharing and validation. Why would I care what someone thinks of my performance in either (or any) category just because we live next to each other, or went to school together, or work together? I don't get it. Perhaps I should be the poster-child for autism. Now I am convinced of it; I am the strangest person on the planet.

Bassat wrote in post #17759273
This thread makes me think I am one of the strangest people on the planet. . . .

I don't care what anyone else thinks of my photography or my piano playing, or just about anything else. The seemingly quite human need for external validation completely escapes me. I do understand sharing something with someone and having them appreciate whatever it is. What I don't get is the need for that sharing and validation.

You're not that strange. You're just near one end of a bell curve.

The way you wrote about validation suggests that you think people who'd like to go on group photo walks are motivated by a wish to receive compliments on their work. Perhaps I misunderstood, but that's the impression I got. There are other reasons, such as the opportunity for teaching and learning; a desire to combine socializing with an activity that's important to you (it beats small talk); the prospect of finding people who understand what you're doing and take an interest in the details; safety in numbers for places where you wouldn't go alone. Getting your work evaluated isn't the only thing. It may not be a "thing" at all. Your touring companions likely won't even see the images you come up with after choosing shots and postprocessing them.

OhLook wrote in post #17759526
You're not that strange. You're just near one end of a bell curve.

The way you wrote about validation suggests that you think people who'd like to go on group photo walks are motivated by a wish to receive compliments on their work. Perhaps I misunderstood, but that's the impression I got. There are other reasons, such as the opportunity for teaching and learning; a desire to combine socializing with an activity that's important to you (it beats small talk); the prospect of finding people who understand what you're doing and take an interest in the details; safety in numbers for places where you wouldn't go alone. Getting your work evaluated isn't the only thing. It may not be a "thing" at all. Your touring companions likely won't even see the images you come up with after choosing shots and postprocessing them.

You read me fairly well. Perhaps a group of fellow camera nuts wouldn't look at me a quite as strangely if I sit on the sidewalk in downtown Chicago or risk the centerline on LV Blvd to get a shot. Sometimes I do wish my wife took more of an interest in the mechanics and particulars of what I do. But hey, I love her cooking, and don't really care what spoon or pot she uses to whip up yet another fantastic meal. She hangs, and shares my photos. She has submitted my photos to contests, two of which I won. I like to clean the kitchen after she cooks. It is my way of showing appreciation for her efforts, even when they fail. Please don't take that wrong. She is a fantastic cook who loves to experiment. Some experiments come out better than others. I have similar outcomes with my photography; some works, some not.

Thank you for the kind, thoughtful words and your well-written response. How deliciously female it is. I have always preferred the way women interact and communicate to that of men. When my wife and I do get involved in the holiday activities, I am always in the kitchen with the women. Much better company than in front of TV with the 'guys'. I enjoy working in a female dominated profession. I am much more comfortable with women. I recently came across the Lady Photographer Thread, and it felt like home. If the LPT ever sponsors a walk/shoot, I just may join you.

Thanks, but I still think I'm kind of out there. The end of that bell-curve is in the 1% range, you know!

Bassat wrote in post #17759569
Thank you for the kind, thoughtful words and your well-written response.

You're welcome, and thank you.

I've got it! You're either a licensed clinical social worker or a masseur.

LCSW is close enough to pay the bills. Nurse.

I would like to offer a different definition of 'take pictures with friends' to consider...

1. Establish some gathering location and time/date for everyone to congregate, then
   
2. disperse to take photos, perhaps alone or perhaps accompanying 2-3 others
   
3. Gather at the end of the outing to have a pot-luck lunch gathering, in which each participant brings something to share with the others
   

Bassat wrote in post #17759709
LCSW is close enough to pay the bills. Nurse.

I didn't think of that, since male nurses aren't rare anymore.

Wilt wrote in post #17759710
I would like to offer a different definition of 'take pictures with friends' to consider...

1. Establish some gathering location and time/date for everyone to congregate, then
   
2. disperse to take photos, perhaps alone or perhaps accompanying 2-3 others
   
3. Gather at the end of the outing to have a pot-luck lunch gathering, in which each participant brings something to share with the others
   

That sounds workable. You'd just about have to meet in someone's home to deposit and refrigerate the food.

OhLook wrote in post #17760251
I didn't think of that, since male nurses aren't rare anymore.

That sounds workable. You'd just about have to meet in someone's home to deposit and refrigerate the food.

Coolers with ice is a suitable alternative for a picnic in the field!

Wilt wrote in post #17760363
Coolers with ice is a suitable alternative for a picnic in the field!

I see. The idea requires driving.

OhLook wrote in post #17760387
I see. The idea requires driving.

You better watch your tongue. There are many cyclist who have bicycles capable of being able to be set up to carry all the supplies necessary to feed 6 or more folks.

OhLook wrote in post #17760387
I see. The idea requires driving.

No, IF you drive, bring a cooler. OR If everyone takes a bicycle, meet at someone's house. (BTW, how would anyone bring enough food to share around the group, if arriving on a bicycle?!)

Not sure where any exclusive conditionals are being driven from! After all, this isn't the 'ultraconservatives vs. the convervatives and liberals' uncompromising hard line, like our government is at the present.

Nogo wrote in post #17760399
You better watch your tongue. There are many cyclist who have bicycles capable of being able to be set up to carry all the supplies necessary to feed 6 or more folks.

Good point, but most bikes aren't fitted out to carry a cooler. Mine never was. Anyway, the traffic around here has become so crazy I don't use it anymore. Too many drivers think a red light is a decoration.

Wilt wrote in post #17760632
No, IF you drive, bring a cooler. OR If everyone takes a bicycle, meet at someone's house. (BTW, how would anyone bring enough food to share around the group, if arriving on a bicycle?!)

The general rule for potlucks is: bring the same total volume that you will eat and drink. It can be one dish. If everyone does this, it works out.

Bassat wrote in post #17759273
I don't care what anyone else thinks of my photography or my piano playing, or just about anything else. The seemingly quite human need for external validation completely escapes me. I do understand sharing something with someone and having them appreciate whatever it is. What I don't get is the need for that sharing and validation. Why would I care what someone thinks of my performance in either (or any) category just because we live next to each other, or went to school together, or work together? I don't get it. Perhaps I should be the poster-child for autism. Now I am convinced of it; I am the strangest person on the planet.

i think different people need different levels of affirmation. of course you got the extremes where a person is taking a zillion selfies and posting them to facebook and instagram constantly, and is probably a clear sign of low self-esteem, or perhaps the extreme opposite. but i think most people do tend to feed a little off of good vibes from other people, and like to give out kudos themselves.

i'm no psychologist, but i think most kids are better with some positive reinforcement from both their parents and friends. i mean, if you got kids, i'm sure you certainly like to praise them once in a while or at least tell them good job if they really did do good. it's positive reinforcement after all. and the kids that get bullied and stuff do feel crappy.

...but then you start to "grow up" and things evolve. some people go off the deep end and don't make it. the majority probably don't have to deal with anything too extreme though. and others adapt in the different ways.

but for me i am still exploring life. and it's clear to me life is about......... life. society. people. interaction. facebook, instagram, etc., are all aspects of that interaction with life.

so, yeah, i like people to like my stuff.