Should I be offended?

Recently, I did some engagement photos for a good friend of mine. I think they turned out great, and she absolutely loved them. No problem there.
Fast forward a couple weeks, and she's posting/showing off the photos everywhere...Facebook, Instagram, her blog, YouTube channel, etc...
Now on one hand, I'm flattered that she loves the photos so much, but on the other hand, I'm feeling a little hurt that she hasn't credited/tagged me in any of them. Especially when people are commenting specifically how great the photos themselves are.
This isn't an issue of "You need my permission to post these" or anything, but more so feeling a bit unappreciated by a friend.
Am I worrying too much over nothing? Is there a way I could maybe approach it without causing an issue? Any thoughts and comments would be appreciated!

Let it go. You keep thinking about this, you start harbouring ill feelings and you'll hurt the friendship. You delivered, she paid you: the transaction ends there. Even though you retain the copyright, you can't tell her what to do with the photos.

Focus your time, energy, and browsing on the next project or something else.

tbsguy18 wrote in post #17725718
Recently, I did some engagement photos for a good friend of mine. I think they turned out great, and she absolutely loved them. No problem there.
Fast forward a couple weeks, and she's posting/showing off the photos everywhere...Facebook, Instagram, her blog, YouTube channel, etc...
Now on one hand, I'm flattered that she loves the photos so much, but on the other hand, I'm feeling a little hurt that she hasn't credited/tagged me in any of them. Especially when people are commenting specifically how great the photos themselves are.
This isn't an issue of "You need my permission to post these" or anything, but more so feeling a bit unappreciated by a friend.
Am I worrying too much over nothing? Is there a way I could maybe approach it without causing an issue? Any thoughts and comments would be appreciated!

I think you're looking at it in a way that isn't going to benefit you right now.

They're showing their moment, it's all about them. They're not posting them so that everyone can ignore their purpose, and just ask for who did the photos so they can book right away. You know? I agree it would be good to credit the photos to you. If anything a subtle one or something. This is why water marks are so useful. A subtle watermark that if someone web searched what they saw, would point to you.

Very best,

That seems like the best course of action. I guess the only reason it really "bothers" me, is because I've always been credited by anyone else I've done photos for. And being friends, I sorted of figured she'd put my name out there.

As for focusing my attention elsewhere, my brother just brought me some Taco Bell. So I'm distracted.

Normal human feeling, but it needs to be tempered. We won't be always credited –and watermarks would be just a way of forcing yourself onto them to give you credit. I've had some clients explicitly request that none of the images I deliver to them have any watermarks whatsoever as they don't want to credit me. Mind, I never include watermarks with final images, so that's an easy request to fulfill. The way I see it, as long as get paid, I care not: I still own the copyright, so I can use the images for my portfolio so why worry? Now, if they didn't even want me using said images on my own portfolio, then they must purchase an exclusive licence which comes with an expiry date and a hefty price tag.

But anywise, don't dwell on it. If you retreat into the backstage you'll stand more of a chance of them remembering who did their amazing photos and heartily recommend you when the occasion arises. If you 'demand' credit either by comments or watermarks, they'll remember you as a jerk and will never drop your name around. And besides, who can tell she's not leaving your name around even as we type? Not everything people say or do happens online, you know?

It would be really easy to get all self-righteous and offer condescending advice but the bottom line is that yeah, it can be a little irking.

From another perspective, its a lot to expect of her to automatically know the etiquette.

You seem to have a choice of:

• Finding it within yourself to let it go.
  
• Gently mention to her that it's customary to give photo credit.
  
• Keep festering over it and carry that emotional baggage.
  

sounds like a terrible friend...

i'd tell a mutual friend(a better friend than her) to comment on them and ask "who took these amazing, totally awesome spectacular photos?!??"...if she doesn't give you credit there, well then, i don't know what to say

She just got engaged, she's excited, it is all about her and so it should be.

You don't need to ask whether you should be offended, you either feel it or you don't.

Just be happy for your friend and take pride in a job well done.

I'd have no problem lightheartedly asking for a shout out. Many people just don't think about it, so no need to be offended. No biggie asking a friend to throw you some luv. Now, if they refuse after your request, then yes, I would be offended.

Alveric wrote in post #17725725
Let it go. You keep thinking about this, you start harbouring ill feelings and you'll hurt the friendship. You delivered, she paid you: the transaction ends there. Even though you retain the copyright, you can't tell her what to do with the photos.

Focus your time, energy, and browsing on the next project or something else.

Sound advice ... let it ride. Your profit is down the road.

The way I see it, it's never a client's responsibility to do my marketing for me. If they credit/tag me, it's an added bonus. If they don't, then it is what it is. My goal is to make sure they're happy with the photos, and make sure they had a good enough experience that they can be used as a referral/referrer in the future. Social media has opened up a whole new can of worms with regards to what is acceptable and expected of one another. Maybe given enough time the social contract will be one where we are expected to credit one another, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

If it's a big deal, I'd add something in your contracts that you be tag/credited somewhere when they post the photos. Then when they don't you can send a polite "Hey, saw you posted the photos on XYZ. Glad you like them! Btw, please remember to tag me where necessary. Thanks!"

ETA: Or you can do the whole including separate web-res files with watermarks thing when you send the photos. Heard a lot of people say they do that with mixed success (ie. some people will post the hi res w/o watermark anyway)

I have many Facebook friends who credit their photographers, and no idea how many do not!

Let it drop. Don't beat yourself up over this or let it change your friendship. Just learn from it for the future.

Something similar happened to me after a photo shoot for an actor. Pissed me off actually. It will fade.

If the person is truly a good friend then it should be no issue to casually ask them to credit you for the photos. It is way better to just ask them then it is to keep thinking about it and wondering if you should be offended. In doing that you are creating an issue which likely doesn't exist.

But this is a question about friendship, not photography.