Testing your faith in humanity

Do you ever just get that feeling that you want to test the waters out there and see if there is good still left in people. Do you have that feeling that "Yeah, I can trust this person" and then you get burned. As long as I know that it is not going to cost me allot I like to try these little tests. I don't do it blindly and certainly not all that often but I do do it.

I've been approached many times for images off of my website. In most cases it is just a single print. I can usually gauge if the person is telling me the truth about what it is to be used for. Case in point, in the past 6 months or so I had a couple of different members here approach me about buying a large print off of my site. Time for a test I thought. I checked their posting history and thought, yeah why not. So rather than me printing and sending the print to them I said, I'll resize the image to what you want and you can print it and send me what you think they are worth. One sent me a nice little cheque for more than what I charge for the prints normally. The other, well let's say I got burned. Never heard from them again and given that it was my little test, I never bothered to remind them.

Case number 2. I worked with this person in another industry many years ago. She was now the bigwig in a city department. So she phones me and says she wants some shots of the staff for their newsletter. If I would do this for them she will make it worthwhile for me in future larger jobs for the city. You guessed it. Nada. Burned again.

Case number 3. I get a call from a local advertising agency and they want to see my work. So I buff up the portfolio over a couple of days and go in and meet with them. They say they like what they see and the pricing was ok. The meeting lasted all of 20 minutes, if that. So then they call me a couple of weeks later and say they have this shoot. It ended up taking about 2 days of solid shooting and a day of post processing. We talk about the need for a purchase order or something more than just an email to guarantee the payment. I got this, you can trust us speech. Something in me said that I could. I went ahead and did all the work, supplied the images to spec and then called the agency director to find out how to bill. Bet you think that I got burned. Wrong, this has turned out to be one fantastic relationship. I was told to bill my rates and then pad it just a little for getting the job done so fast. Now I work for them regularly. We have formalized it a little bit more with job numbers and purchase order numbers but that is more for them to track the costs by job. Ok, faith in humanity returning.

Have you done things like this that have worked out or that you have kicked yourself in the butt afterwards saying, stupid, stupid, stupid.

I have to say that most of mine have worked out and that I have won more than I lost. I have that streak in me that likes to see if there are still good people in this world.

I tend to follow my instincts and do what I believe is right. I don't believe in getting burnt. Sometimes our judgement is wrong and results are not palitable, but it is then daft to assume that means anything in terms of future decisions. That is just a story. Sh*t happens so learn, get over it and move on.

I have always felt that it's my fault if I judge somebody's character wrong... so, when situations happen that has left me feeling dazed and mistreated I just go back in time and there's usually stepping stones leading up to a very predictable offense... as for humanity it continually disapoints and disgusts me and then. almost as quickly it doesn't. People are everywhere each one as human as the next all within this general globe of whatever comes our way.. Perceptions in everything can be incorrect or right on the money.. Those circle of friends that somehow seem more family than friends, the simple everyday kindnesses out there you can see them constantly much more common than the other kind... I am always hurt, but it's usually for myself because, I should know better.. A bad habit of mine definately not improved upon because of the camera is to look at the world as a canvas sometimes involving myself more than likely sitting in the hypothetical corner watching and waiting for a good entrance point, that somehow rarely materializes..

I have not read your entire thread, but I have lost a lot of trust in people, and I'm a kid.

I have a PS3 I pre-ordered. Now let's not even talk about price gouging because I don't want to get into that. I spent about 10 hours in line with some other people, one couple, who said they would list my PS3 on eBay. They live in Niagra Falls, but visit Thornhill because one of their mothers lives there. So I call them after I get my console, and they say they want me to give them the console and they will write me a post-dated check. I asked them why they can't just list it, send me the money when the auction is over and I'll ship it. They said they can't trust me. So I said I'd call them back (I knew I wasn't going to take them up on their offer, but I didn't want to be rude about it.) Anyway, cutting to the chase, I called the guy back and he began to whine about trust and stuff, so I just ended the call quick, but I thought it was funny, I was willing to give him $ to list it, and he wanted me to trust him by giving him an item in return for a post-dated check (like those have never bounced before), and when I turned down his offer he said I lacked trust, although I think it was the other way around, and the way he was speaking to me it almost sounded like he was going to run away with my item (who knows, but I'm not taking a risk.)

condyk wrote in post #2285574
Sh*t happens so learn, get over it and move on.

Oh I do, in fact I will continue to do these little things and fully expect to be disappointed in the future. The key is to be pleased more than disappointed. I could always go to the flipside and not trust a soul but then that would make a bad person, one that I couldn't live with.

I believe it is fair to say that I won't be trusting the son of the Nigerian royalty as much as he sounds like he really needs my help. He does sound like a nice person.

About 2 years ago an online friend called me and after stumbling around for a few minutes finally got the courage to ask me for a loan. She and her family were in dire straights and she felt she had no one to turn to. Now, I have been burned in the past lending money to "friends" but I had some extra and sent her what I could through paypal. Time goes by, and we lose touch (as happens with online friendships). I never expected to see the money again, but I knew that was a possibility when I lent it.

Long story short, last week I got an email from her. She said that her husband had just made a deposit into my paypal account for the full amount that they had borrowed and thanked me again for helping them out of a tough spot. Although the money was welcomed, the fact that they were able to repay it AND DID SO was much more appreciated.

ssim wrote in post #2285639
I could always go to the flipside and not trust a soul but then that would make a bad person, one that I couldn't live with.

Exactly

JaGWiRE wrote in post #2285619
I have not read your entire thread, but I have lost a lot of trust in people, and I'm a kid.

I have a PS3 I pre-ordered. Now let's not even talk about price gouging because I don't want to get into that. I spent about 10 hours in line with some other people, one couple, who said they would list my PS3 on eBay. They live in Niagra Falls, but visit Thornhill because one of their mothers lives there. So I call them after I get my console, and they say they want me to give them the console and they will write me a post-dated check. I asked them why they can't just list it, send me the money when the auction is over and I'll ship it. They said they can't trust me. So I said I'd call them back (I knew I wasn't going to take them up on their offer, but I didn't want to be rude about it.) Anyway, cutting to the chase, I called the guy back and he began to whine about trust and stuff, so I just ended the call quick, but I thought it was funny, I was willing to give him $ to list it, and he wanted me to trust him by giving him an item in return for a post-dated check (like those have never bounced before), and when I turned down his offer he said I lacked trust, although I think it was the other way around, and the way he was speaking to me it almost sounded like he was going to run away with my item (who knows, but I'm not taking a risk.)

man I'm glad you didn't fall for that scam, they're pretty good tho. That's how con artists work, by making you feel bad and be on the defensive you forgot to think about how you're getting screwed.

Earlier this spring, I was contacted by the "pastor" of a large church in Phoenix, AZ. He explained that he had a large community youth program and they would like to use five of my images for some publicity. The "pastor" gave me a contact at a Phoenix ad agency that was supposedly handling the graphic design. In return for 5 hi-res images, I was to receive photo credit and a finished copy of each of the materials. I was assured on delivery of the images that I would have the finished product in hand no later than July 15th... Contact with the church shows no such "pastor"...contact with the ad agency shows the employee in question is no longer there and no one with the agency or church knows anything of the project. My faith has been tested.

I stopped trusting people as a kid as I felt I was burnt too many times. Talk about being a cynical little 10-12 y/o!! It took me long to start trusting "friends", and I do test my friends occasionally. With age I learnt to not overthink things as much and just accept that sometimes you get burnt, others you get surprised.

Uni time was an important growing up and my first term was a whirlwind as I met so many new people and got burnt here and there. Took a summer to let it all sink in. Then I began to grow up. Nowadays I try to think good about people, but I'm always a bit on guard and I notice faster if I need to be even more on guard.

deadpass wrote in post #2285716
man I'm glad you didn't fall for that scam, they're pretty good tho. That's how con artists work, by making you feel bad and be on the defensive you forgot to think about how you're getting screwed.

Yeah, people think just cause I am a kid I am stupid and will fall for anything.

Jeez Sheldon, how could you fall for #2? The gal worked for a guvamint agency, ripping people off is what they do.

condyk wrote in post #2285574
Sh*t happens so learn, get over it and move on.

Dave, the proper quote for polite company is; "Organic fertilizer occasionally occurs. But you have the correct response.

JaGWiRE wrote in post #2286641
Yeah, people think just cause I am a kid I am stupid and will fall for anything.

Jag, it is not youth that does the scam artist's victims in, it is the victim's own greed that causes them to ignore the warning signs. I am proud of you that you did not fall to the greedy side.

If the deal sounds too good to be true then it probably is.

Skip Souza wrote in post #2287846
Dave, the proper quote for polite company is; "Organic fertilizer occasionally occurs. But you have the correct response.

Thanks for the translation and affirmation ... but as an efficiency expert I need something shorter and sharper. I must leave the long words to those retired and with time on their hands

Skip Souza wrote in post #2287846
Jeez Sheldon, how could you fall for #2? The gal worked for a guvamint agency, ripping people off is what they do.


Dave, the proper quote for polite company is; "Organic fertilizer occasionally occurs. But you have the correct response.


Jag, it is not youth that does the scam artist's victims in, it is the victim's own greed that causes them to ignore the warning signs. I am proud of you that you did not fall to the greedy side.

If the deal sounds too good to be true then it probably is.

Anyway, perhaps this guy wasn't going to scam me, but I wasn't going to take a risk. Rule of thumb is ship or give item after you recieve payment . All I know is that if he was planning to scam me (which my senses lead me to believe, although who knows), he is a scum low life for trying to scam a kid.

Every now and then my faith in humanity is tested, though it happens so often, and sometimes isn't large enough of a deal to worry about it too much.

Back in June, when i was just getting into the paid photography gigs, I worked with a guy for the day, and thought everything was ok. I resize and heavily watermark the images for the day, sent him the proofs, and ask him to send me an email back with the exact filenames. Instead, he renames the files, and just sends them back to me. I told him it wont fly that way. I'm not going to compare images hoping that I'm getting the right ones.

So, we make a deal where I will give him all the images for the day, for a considerably larger amount of money. When it comes to actually paying, I got ripped off. I was pretty much tired of dealing with him, and although I could have refused to hand over the iamges for the amount he wanted to give me, it was at the point where I just wanted end it. Although I took a loss, I think it was worth it.