I think some of what DJ was saying was completely lost here.... though I haven't read every post. He was talking about trying to make the wedding pie bigger. The NFL owners are all competitors, but at the same time, they are all working to make the NFL as a franchise bigger and more successful. The value of wedding photography is viewed far too low by most consumers... why do they need the pictures. Often the food budget is often many times multiple of what the wedding photographer gets. But in 5 years, what is going to be more valuable to the couple and their families. They surely will not remember the food... As a group, we can increase the "value" the customers perceive in photographic work. We can do far more to increase the total take by working together than degrading the skills of those around us. And there are opportunities for big dollar weddings in even the most modest communities. I hesitate to mention this, but I was up in Cleveland this summer working as a second shooter this summer at the catholic cathedral in downtown - the take on that one was far north of the 1-3k. It is sad that the client felt they had to go outside of the area to get a really good photographer because I am sure their were plenty of skill photographers in the area. The problem is perhaps they have branded themselves as lower end or average photographers, rather then great photographers that work affordably. Stuart, I am not even sure they knew you were out there... I am sure you could have done the job.
CDI - to your comments on the 10k wedding, it really isn't that hard to get to 10k. The wedding above, the bridal portrait alone "cost" us more then 1000 to have printed on canvas and then framed. The customer bought 3 hard bound coffee table books with images printed on silver paper - each one "cost" us more then $500 to produce.
How did the photographer get the job... it wasn't because of his images.... well... actually they are better then many, but it was because of his relationship with the customer. This is the first work he had done with them, but if you were to watch him, it was as though he was a trusted family member. He was heavily vested just as though he were the brides parents trying to make sure everything was perfect. It is a skill I don't have. That is why I second shoot. But it is fun to watch.
It's about creating a permanent record - and the value people place on it. That doesn't come from degrading other parts of the industry. If the pie gets bigger, there is more for everyone. Trust me, Durham NC is a backwater town where were it not for Duke University and the Lacrosse case, no one would know where it was. But this photographer from here travels all over the place. I did two weddings with him this summer - one in Cleveland, the other in Oxford England. You don't need to live in NYC or LA to have great opportunities.
Sorry to butt in here... but just because that is how things have been done doesn't mean that is the way it has to be moving forward. This is where experience can be ones own worst enemy.
. You often challenge the system too in a way that helps all of us to keep looking outside of the box. Welcome. 
- Stu
But excellent post.
