Should I refund.

Do what you feel most comfortable with, what lets you sleep at night. Even though it sometimes hurts, I always strive to 'do the right thing.' In this situation, is the $500 or $1,000 worth the cost of thinking someone was in need and I did nothing to help.

To me, my character/reputation is worth more than that. Not to mention my immortal soul!

Two others have said it much better:

The measure of a man's character is what he would do if he knew he never would be found out.
— Baron Thomas Babington Macauley, English historian and statesman (1800-1859)

And the immortal Dear Abby:

The best index to a person’s character is (a) how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and (b) how he treats people who can’t fight back.
— Abigail van Buren (Pauline Esther Friedman), American newspaper advice columnist (1918-2002)

Why not just pay her back what the contract calls for (50% of the deposit + plus any over payment ie she paid on time). Then if you rebook for the week and aren't out a dime, pay her the rest, assuming she signs that she will have no photographer at her wedding.

OdiN1701 wrote in post #5695303
BEFORE YOU GIVE BACK ANY MONEY!

Wait for that check to clear the bank. I would give it at least 10 business days. The last thing you want is to return the cash only for their check to bounce and then you're out $1000.

Before you do anything, this is the best advice. You don't want to get scammed.

I would refund the full amount if you can rebook the day. If not than just charge them the amount to cover the time you've already spent with them. Be sympathetic to their situation because there is a lot of job loss going around these days.

I think people need to read the first post more carefully, re deposits and what has been paid already.

sm1rf wrote in post #5695770
How about this, just thinking outside the box. Give her 50% once your happy the cheque clears, then say "you understand her unusual circumstances and that you will refund the rest on proof that husband has lost job", i.e. P45 or what ever equivalent paper work you get when you leave/lose your job in your country. Some sort of IRS proof of contributions made with said company!

You could do this, but it seems callous and unnecessary.

Give her back 50%, you need to make money too.

jbergdoll wrote in post #5698087
Give her back 50%, you need to make money too.

Are you really that cold? If he hasn't done anything at all....no business need to keep any to cover expenses. If he does...subtract any actual expenses.

Maybe keep some if you turned down any other bookings for that day. If not - why keep it?

That's just my opinion.

I'd have a little trouble shaving in the morning, looking at that guy who took $500 for doing nothing. I agree about making money - but performing a service and delivering a product constitutes my fairplay sense of doing a proper job.

jbergdoll wrote in post #5698087
Give her back 50%, you need to make money too.

FRANK54 wrote in post #5694229
I booked a wedding from someone who found my card on a bulletin board in a store. We talked through email and she booked me for her wedding photography for $1000.

A day after I cashed their check (for the full payment) I got an email saying that her husband lost his job and now they can not afford a photographer for their wedding. I do not know her so I can not say if this is the truth or just a ploy to get her money back because she decided to use someone else for some reason unknown.

I have been shooting weddings for several years and I know what I am doing so I would not even consider this a reason why she wants to back out.

My contract says that the 50% deposit is non refundable, this is usually what I take before the wedding. However she paid all up front.

How much should I refund her?

If you can fill the slot with something that pays as well you've lost nothing but your estimating/contact time. That to me would seem like the most I would charge. However, if you can't fill the slot and you would normally run a full schedule that seems more like a scenario where the contract would be referenced. Then it becomes an act of grace if you decide to offer her as a refund more than your signed contract had established already. The intention of keeping paying gigs lined up is the only serious defense I can think of for not refunding most of the money. If you could fill the spot then you've lost nothing but your estimating/contact time (if you don't keep that much) and you've done your part in garnering good will instead of having potential negative publicity.

I agree with the prior statements about waiting for the check to clear and then giving it 10 days or so. I had someone pay me for a painting once and then they decided they did not want it. Glad I waited to give them their money back because the check never cleared. I would say 50% because of the contract. I will say 75-80% ( depending on how much time you have in it so far and email counts) because life happens and I would not like to be out $500 and get nothing.

If your in it for the long term give her the money back. It will only help your rep. I'm not saying become a door mat but in over 20 years of shooting weddings it only happened to me twice. Over 1000 weddings TWICE.

I would refund everything but your expenses so far, after the check clears.

Wow, I understand why all photographers are basically broke. Here goes.......

Contract says 50%, I'd give 50% back, if you are not going to follow the contract, why even have one?

Do you think she would be unhappy if YOU said "I can't do it" and then made a refund when she still wanted you to do the shoot.............

At best, After sending back $500, I'd say I'll give a future credit of $500 on your next $1000 shoot.

A lot of the people above were right...... Wait for the check to clear. Can't they cut back on the band, flowers, honeymoon or that other stuff.......

Giving it all back but $50 is not good, might as well give it all back than keep $50, that doesn't even fill up a little car......

So what if you have 6 months to get something else in that time slot. Suppose she tells all her friends and they all book you and then they all cancel since they found someone else that was cheaper.

Really I wouldn't do a wedding for anything.......... Too much of this stuff.

Best of luck on it all, no matter what you do they are not going to be happy.

Mark H

P51Mstg wrote in post #5705135
Wow, I understand why all photographers are basically broke.

That's a bit of a generalisation, and as the saying goes, all generalisations are false. Honestly for $500 I wouldn't spent any time or worry on this, i'd just refund and move on.

A little bit of kindness and compassion can go a long way .

tim wrote in post #5705609
That's a bit of a generalisation, and as the saying goes, all generalisations are false. Honestly for $500 I wouldn't spent any time or worry on this, i'd just refund and move on.

i agree- if she is scamming or falsifying her need cause she found cheaper photog etc. then that isnt the kind of people you want to be involved with in this type of relationship and be glad you can wash your hands of it this early and painlessly... now instead of a week before or a day before or the maybe the day of things go crazy and she is actually a real $%#$ (INVALID EMAIL) or something...