How can I improve the lighting in this photo

I had one gelled 430ex flash on top of the phone and a 580ex on the camera.
Here's the unedited shot.

Other than cloning a couple more white spots, I don't think you could do much better than what you've done. I like the effect. I was going to suggest cloning out the flash unit but then I looked at the tweaked shot and saw that you did that rather nicely.

Yeah, you could have tweaked the color balance a little if you didn't like it as warm as it is but that's purely personal preference.

For more background/subject separation you could try putting the borrowed 580EX behind the subject and adjust the power to try to get some subtle rim lighting.

As far as focusing, if your lens has a distance scale on it you could measure the distance between the camera and subject, put the lens in manual focus mode and just set it manually.

You could do some lightpainting with this picture if it is very dark outside. Personally, I hate to see the flash unit (if the orangish box is the flash). I would paint the inside the gelled orange. And then paint the outside of the box with the same flash to make it appear as though orange light is emanating from the phone. Then have the subject walk in with his cig and paint him with the gelled and then the white from the back side for separation/hair whatever. This way, hopefully the subject and his black hair is separated from the black night.

edit: Note, good cloning! I can't tell that you cloned on the first look.

As suggested b4 ...light that background up...not enough to distract from you though. You stand very still and let the exhale smoke look cool.....ur killing urself...might as well look cool doin it.

Cheers

thanks for the comments. ill try again next weekend.

lord alex thank you for your concern

I would put the model in a lighter colored suit, med to dark grey. If that dosen't fit the image in your minds eye, borrow the other flash unit, or (if possible) rent a studio lighting kit.

hmm. what about boosting the power on the flash inside of the phone booth?

Here is what I might do, but it would take a few more 430's or 580's.

Take the 580 off the camera, and put it in a stand outside the frame camera left, and further behind the subject. Keep it high, add a warming gel to make it look like its coming from a street light. This will add some rim lighting to the subject for separation. Also, by removing the flash from the camera, you won't get that on camera flash that is evident on the front of the phone booth.

Since you've removed the on camera flash, your subject could use a little more frontal lighting. I would add another flash a bit off the the left of the camera and snooted such that it just illuminates the subject and not too much on the front of the phone booth.

I'd reposition the strobe in the phone booth so its not visible. If I couldn't do that, I'd just make sure the reflections show up in an area that is easily retouched out. (you've already done that in the second version, just mentioned it for others).

Lastly, I'd use a tripod and start opening up the shutter and ISO to pick up a bit of the background. Not too much, but enough to give the image some depth. If you run out of shutter or ISO speed, I'd add a low power flash to help do the rest.

Adding the other lights will make a world of different in separating the subject, and adding depth to the image.