Sounds wonderful 
and sadly...I'm totally serious.
This all happened in ONE night within roughly 10 blocks of my house (and I live in a supposedly good neighbourhood)
Six men in their late teens and early 20s have been charged after a rash of robberies over the weekend.
The first incident occurred on Saturday around 10:30 p.m. when a man walking near 111 Street and 83 Avenue was approached by a man carrying a bat. The aspiring thief demanded the man's wallet.
When the victim refused, he was struck by the bat. The perp fled without the wallet.
About 20 minutes later, a man sitting in a car near 109 Street and 86 Avenue was approached by the same crook, who demanded his wallet.
A few minutes later, a man and woman walking near 110 Street and 88 Avenue were approached by a crook who demanded money and threatened them. The two men began fighting, while the woman called police.
Not long after, another man was approached near 85 Avenue and 111 Street and assaulted and had his wallet stolen. Some of the victims received minor injuries.
Christopher Thomas Vickers, 20, has been charged with several counts of robbery, two breaches and mischief in connection with the incidents.
Less than six hours later, several men approached a man walking near 109 Street and 70 Avenue, assaulted him and fled with his cellphone. He received minor injuries.
Then, around 7:30 a.m., the group allegedly used the victim's cellphone to order pizza, but the group had more than food on their minds.
When the delivery man arrived at the home in the Knottwood Road area, he was robbed of his food and his money by the group who fled in a vehicle.
The vehicle was later found parked outside a house near 61 Street and 35 Avenue.
Cops have arrested five men - including 21-year-old Jeil Simon, 19-year-old Michael Joseph Motiuk and three 17-year-old males - and laid robbery-related charges.
To add insult to injury...I had to write that one hahaha
