General Wedding Somewhat less Chit-Chatty of Late (Everyone's gotten busy) Thread (6)

SuzyView wrote in post #11274431
So, I'm thinking I like the Mima thing, Mo.

I had planned on being "Gamma", Suzie. But when Aaron started calling me Mima, of course I thought it was amazing. Nicholas called me "Mama" then "Mimi" and now Mima or Mimi. I am happy with either.Here is a picture I took that I really liked.....

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My heart goes out to you, Mo. I know those boys will always be a big part of your life. I'm thinking they are lucky to have you. I am not liking the Chinese version of Grandmother on the father's side. But who am I? I guess it's an honor to have children from your son's line.

I shot Jared's last soccer game this year. They lost in a shootout. It was sad. But his team tried so hard. They have amazing heart. Back to cooking steaks and potatoes for dinner. I thought, if he didn't win, at least we had good food to celebrate the end of the year.

Some photos from last night with Charlie.

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Jeff, those are beautiful! I love the PP.

nice puppy shots Jeff

been keeping myself busy over the past week with photography.. putting a model folio for this young lady

meet Cheryl

Very nice.

Jeff and Bob...very nice work

Good Morning, Suzie...we are going to have a rainy day today

Back from my vacation to Atlanta & Birmingham. Here is my G11 moment.

You are never to old to use an iPad...meet my 96 years young Aunt Louise looking at photos on my iPad

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She looks very intent on seeing every detail, Jim. Good for you! I'm thinking Patrick and I will get one each by Generation II, but he brought over the new Rock Band 3 keyboard yesterday. I almost cried when he showed it to my sons. He's the worst for gadgets. So, we're probably going to get one of those for Christmas.

Good morning everyone.

I need to ask a small favor......keep me and my family in your thoughts today. I have come to the difficult decision that I need to no longer foster my cousin and move on from all of that. I feel terrible failing her but I can no longer put up with her issues...or rather will no longer put up with them.

Just send happy air to SW WI please?

Sorry it's come to that, Tiff, but you always knew it was a possibility even if she may not have wanted to believe it.

These are very difficult years. I call them the "Just hold on until the other side" years. It's between 11-18, when they just need a safe place to explode every now and then. They don't want the responsibilities of growing up but all the benefits and privileges. It's when many adult voices are needed and a village is necessary and parents and close family do their best, but maybe it's time to get a therapist. I have been blessed to have had many, many close older friends around all the time. My religion is good that way, we always have youth leaders and teachers for the children from the time they are 1 and 1/2 years old. My sons here have had Patrick and his parents to help. Patrick handles Greg's explosions so well, the older brother my sons are not related to, but love. Maybe it's time you get the help you need. Love doesn't do it all at this time of their lives, Tiff. Don't give up on her. Youth today just want to get there fast, without the pain, or the responsibilities. She will not have a good life if she continues this way. The fix is very painful later.

Jon wrote in post #11293673
Sorry it's come to that, Tiff, but you always knew it was a possibility even if she may not have wanted to believe it.

I know.

SuzyView wrote in post #11293696
These are very difficult years. I call them the "Just hold on until the other side" years. It's between 11-18, when they just need a safe place to explode every now and then. They don't want the responsibilities of growing up but all the benefits and privileges. It's when many adult voices are needed and a village is necessary and parents and close family do their best, but maybe it's time to get a therapist. I have been blessed to have had many, many close older friends around all the time. My religion is good that way, we always have youth leaders and teachers for the children from the time they are 1 and 1/2 years old. My sons here have had Patrick and his parents to help. Patrick handles Greg's explosions so well, the older brother my sons are not related to, but love. Maybe it's time you get the help you need. Love doesn't do it all at this time of their lives, Tiff. Don't give up on her. Youth today just want to get there fast, without the pain, or the responsibilities. She will not have a good life if she continues this way. The fix is very painful later.

Suzy, I totally get it. I've just gotten to where I just can't do it. I can't deal with the disrespect and utter disregard of everyone else in the family. She is very mean to Aidan the vast majority of the time and is also not kind to Ian when she is in a mood. She tells me all the time how she hates little kids. She is only nice and happy when she is getting what she wants and is too good for us when she is not. She never speaks to my husband unless she needs him for something. She is a master manipulator....she knows how to get my guilt flowing. Her language is an issue on facebook and with me. We had to go to the ER three weeks ago because she purposely overdosed on her anti depressants just to get high along with drinking cough syrup and alcohol. The first night she goes somewhere from off her grounding she went to spend the night at a friends and conveniently ommitted a side trip to visit her boyfriend of three weeks (half of that they were broken up or fighting) just to end up having sex with him while his mom was there. We got into it last night and she told me she wasn't staying at the house. I insisted she was. She walked out of the garage when I stopped the car and told me to f**k off after I told her that I would call the police if she left. I did so and he was no help.

I am so done. I am done with the mood swings, disrespect, and utter disregard for anyone else. A friend of hers confided in me last night that she was back into drugs. I'm just done. It is hurting my kids....she takes time and energy from me...more than they BOTH do and I refuse to do it anymore. They are MY babies and they won't be so for much longer. They are growing too fast and I refuse to squander the rest of their babyhood fighting and dealing with someone who has no respect or cares not a bit for me. I need to be selfish in this case and focus on my family, my husband and what this is doing to them as well as my family's reputation and that of my business. I'm done sacrificing their happiness for hers.

I hope that doesn't make me seem like a bad person or like I'm taking the easy way out. I just know my limits and she has so far blown past them now that I just can't.

Tiff, no one is judging you. If anything, we are hoping to support you through this. And my family took in a runaway once, his parents were not really friends of ours when we took Tom in, but this young man ran away and we took him in. He only had respect for me and my husband. He didn't disrespect us, even the kids loved him. Our youngest's middle name is Thomas for him. But he was absolutely awful to his own family. I felt terrible every time his Dad came over to bring something for him. It was the drugs and the anger. Tommy had great parents and a wonderful life. The drugs were the beginning of his downward spiral. He's fine now, many years later. He was saved through his family letting him go. He lived with his brother for a year after leaving us. He still doesn't get it sometimes, but he is loved. His parents never gave up on him. You have sacrificed. But you need not worry about your children. They see what that kind of life, always angry and bitter and taking no blame, is not what they want. My older sons never copied Tom's behavior. They pitied him. Your children and husband will be fine and you will be too. Just have to make some decisions and somehow, it will all work out.

Good for you suzy! It's great that there are people like you in the world!

I have just finally come to realize that what it is costing me and my family is not worth it. She doesn't want to be any different. She doesn't want counseling and has flat out refused and told me she would tell a "shrink" to f**k off if I forced her to go.

Yeah. Sounds like you're beating a dead horse. This situation may be out of your hands now. If she really wants to go, no one can stop her. She may be underage, but she can be considered an adult now.