Syburn - Yes you can control the amount of sharpness and contrast that your camera applies to your shots, but.....
DSLR's offer you the opportunity to do this AFTER you transfer the images to your computer. This gives you the ability to "tweak" each image separately as opposed to a "blanket" setting for all shots in camera.
P&S cams are targeted at a very broad market segment - many of whom are just occasional "picture takers". This goes way back to the film P&S days, when you took your roll in in and got back an envelope of 3.5x5 (later 4x6) prints. Very sharp and very saturated. If this is what you are used to seeing most of your life, then that is what your mind says is "normal".
Serious 35mm and Digital shooters enjoy the ability to fine tune their images to personal standards. How, how much, and when is considered a disirable option.
Why do some digital images 'pop' and some look soft and dreamy - simple, the shooter made the changes to achieve the effect they wanted.
If you set the camera up to do all shots sharper or more saturated - you might be cheating yourself out of a lot of personal satisfaction down the road.
A 40D, a 30D, some nice glass and a great Shooting Partner.
"...As in music, so in life."