You've done a good job, just work on getting your exposure right. If you shot these in RAW, up the exposure by at least 1/2 a stop, probably more, since I had to add quite a bit of brightness to the image. Here is my attempt, using some of my usual retouching steps.
1) Defog
2) Reduce Noise - masked out the eyes, nose, lips, hair
3) Curves - Lighten preset - change blending mode to Luminosity
4) Curves - Medium Contrast preset - change blending mode to Luminosity - masked out the eyes and hair
5) Curves - Lighten preset - change blending mode to Luminosity - set opacity to 50%
6) Curves - no preset or adjustments - change blending mode to Soft Light - set opacity to 20%
7) Run Bring Out The Eyes action from Pioneer Woman - set opacity to 50% - applied only to the iris
8. Cloned out the tiny piece of catchlight going into the pupil
9) Dodge Tool - set to Highlights 8% - dodged around where the iris and pupil meet, with a little extra dodging opposite the catch light
10) Burn Tool - set to Shadows 10% - burned along outer iris and eyelashes
11) Sponge Tool - set to Saturate 25% - saturated the iris just a touch
12) Used the healing tool on the little scratch
13) Image was still a little too dark, did a Levels adjustment, setting midtones to 1.20 - changed blending mode to Luminosity - masked out everything but her face, as I always like the face to be the brightest thing
14) Image was a little off on color balance, so did a Levels adjustment and adjusted each of the color channels to correct the slight color cast
I think that was it. Just play around with the different adjustments, keeping in mind that the mask tool is your friend and apply each adjustment only to where you want/need them.
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