another try at ocf with speedlights

did some pictures for my sister in law and her husband
580ex2 in a silver umbrella,i think half power with a 70-200 f4 lens
cc please

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Lighting is nice. I think the location distracts from the subjects though.

#1
nice composition. overexposed area in background is distracting. knee in bottom of frame is distracting.

#2
they seem a little uncomfortable. cropping the left side may help the composition.

JS

I'm not a big fan of the pose in either shot. I agree that the overexposed background hurts you in #1, with ocf you could easily knock that down a bit and have a better shot. In #2 they are on the right side of the shot, looking to the right. Its okay to use the rule of thirds and have them off center on a horizontal shot, but you want them looking back into the frame rather than out of it. You can break this rule to build some creative tension, but the subjects ought to have the attitude to back it up, and these arent attitude shots. Its a good start though, find a simpler background and find a pose where their heads can be closer to the same level and you'll nail it.

thanks for the cc guys

i like second shot a bit more

Second shot is a much better pose, but as others mentioned its always good to allow some "negative space" in the direction the people are posed otherwise it looks like they are standing with their face next to a wall.

One of the greatest things about having a flash is you can use it to create multiple exposures of different areas from a single image.

I would underexpose the background and correct the exposure of the subject through the flash.

Second shot looks good for a first try!

thanks for the cc everyone