The OLDER Photographers' thread...

Ricardo222 wrote in post #15441018
Hey Jim, Marg and I send our very best wishes and hope that this year brings some good fortue and happiness.

We hope to see you again before too long.

I hope to see you again soon too, this was one of the brightest memories for the year! I appreciate the note from you and Marg.

I tried to get my wife to go to Australia and New Zealand instead of Hawaii, but after hearing how long my trip was this was a hard sell. She does not travel well. I will keep working on her!

I still say more people should get out there and meet fellow POTN'ers as much as possible!

Wow, you guys...it's hard to know how to conribute...as the years go by, "loss" becomes part of our vocabulary...I'm gonna stop now...

Jill-of-all-Trades wrote in post #15440783


Sure know what that position feels like. Glad you got Christmas with him.

Unfortunately he was put in the hospital on Dec 12th he lives in a different city than I. It is a small city so the nurse just calls and gives updates. It is to bad that the day before they thought he had weeks yet but after last night that all went down the tubes. I was going to try and drive there but the nurse said I probably wouldn't make it. He is not coherent either mostly just sleeping she said he doesn't even recognize his wife.
My other sister asked her if they had thought about what they would do as they knew when my mother passed away all the problems that resulted from not making any arrangements. She told my sister that they had and that he would be cremated and she was going to keep him at home until she dies and then the two will be buried together.
His new wife of just a few yrs is not my favorite person so just as well that I don't see her. She latched herself onto my dad a few yrs before my mother died. I was not pleased!! What kind of person does that....my mother was very ill in the last few yrs of her life and not a very fun person to be around but that doesn't excuse my dad either for his part in it. They were married almost exactly 4mths after my mom passed away.

JAZZ D.P.G. wrote in post #15440903
Thanks, and you have my thoughts for the next few days. My Father went through the morphine treatment at the end, it was much better than the pain.

83 is pretty good, even if the last ten was a fight.

I don't pray, so will just wish you strength, and keep you in my thoughts.

I don't pray either so your wishes are very appreciated.

tonylong wrote in post #15441304
Wow, you guys...it's hard to know how to conribute...as the years go by, "loss" becomes part of our vocabulary...I'm gonna stop now...

Yes I suppose that is very true as we age. Thinking about my dad today...he is such a charactor...he used to read the obituaries and say "oh look so and so passed away" "oh well he only has to do that once".

He also used to tell me when you are young you look in the paper to see who graduated, who got married and who had a baby....then as you get old you only look to see who died. A sure sign he said that he was old when a lot of his friends had died.

JAZZ D.P.G. wrote in post #15441044
I tried to get my wife to go to Australia and New Zealand instead of Hawaii, but after hearing how long my trip was this was a hard sell. She does not travel well. I will keep working on her!

I still say more people should get out there and meet fellow POTN'ers as much as possible!

My husband wants to go to Australia..I think it would be awesome there but I also would love to go to Hawaii.
How cool that is to meet other POTN's....someday I will!

Jill-of-all-Trades wrote in post #15440791
December to March is a rough time of year for me. This Christmas wasn't too bad, but I was so busy that I barely noticed that it was Christmas.

Oh that is so sad for you Melody a 4 month stretch wow. You are right tho it helps a ton if you can just keep busy. By the sounds of your daily life that is not a hard thing to accomplish. Sometimes you make my head spin with how busy you get.

QueenChatty wrote in post #15441552
Unfortunately he was put in the hospital on Dec 12th he lives in a different city than I. It is a small city so the nurse just calls and gives updates. It is to bad that the day before they thought he had weeks yet but after last night that all went down the tubes. I was going to try and drive there but the nurse said I probably wouldn't make it. He is not coherent either mostly just sleeping she said he doesn't even recognize his wife.
My other sister asked her if they had thought about what they would do as they knew when my mother passed away all the problems that resulted from not making any arrangements. She told my sister that they had and that he would be cremated and she was going to keep him at home until she dies and then the two will be buried together.
His new wife of just a few yrs is not my favorite person so just as well that I don't see her. She latched herself onto my dad a few yrs before my mother died. I was not pleased!! What kind of person does that....my mother was very ill in the last few yrs of her life and not a very fun person to be around but that doesn't excuse my dad either for his part in it. They were married almost exactly 4mths after my mom passed away.

Ugh, that's not fun at all!

It wasn't long after my Mom passed that a lady we knew from church started getting friendly with my Dad. At first it just seemed that she was being friendly (her husband had passed a few years before) but the 'friendly' got too friendly. She would call every day, invite him over for dinner all the time, give him little gifts, call him pet names, etc. Dad said he had no interest in having a girlfriend. And he told her so, but she continued. The first Christmas she gave each of us kids a present. But she completely ignored us every other moment. Even when we would answer the phone she would be very abrupt with us. That made us dislike her even more.
Eventually Dad just kept telling her no and was always too busy to go for dinner. I think she finally lost interest and backed off. She will always get the cold should from us kids.

QueenChatty wrote in post #15441610
Oh that is so sad for you Melody a 4 month stretch wow. You are right tho it helps a ton if you can just keep busy. By the sounds of your daily life that is not a hard thing to accomplish. Sometimes you make my head spin with how busy you get.

It is quite the stretch unfortunately.

Dec 22 we found out that Mom's cancer was back and that short of a miracle it would be her last Christmas.

End of Jan Mom went to a pain clinic appointment in London. They admitted her to the hospital.

Last week of Feb Mom was moved to Sarnia to be closer to home.

Friday February 29th at 5:45 pm Mom passed.

Friday March 28th, exactly 4 weeks later, my 27th birthday. Would have been Mom's 63rd birthday. Yup, was born on Mom's 36th birthday. A lifetime of sharing birthdays was gone.

June 3rd, my niece Elizabeth was born.

You are a bunch of kids. I hit that 35 mark 40 years ago when I was chasing TV news with a 16mm CP-16. I hated it when 3/4" tape replaced film, and now I'm shooting digital stills for a hobby.

Maybe old photogs never die; they just go digital.

Jill-of-all-Trades wrote in post #15441646
It is quite the stretch unfortunately.

Dec 22 we found out that Mom's cancer was back and that short of a miracle it would be her last Christmas.

End of Jan Mom went to a pain clinic appointment in London. They admitted her to the hospital.

Last week of Feb Mom was moved to Sarnia to be closer to home.

Friday February 29th at 5:45 pm Mom passed.

Friday March 28th, exactly 4 weeks later, my 27th birthday. Would have been Mom's 63rd birthday. Yup, was born on Mom's 36th birthday. A lifetime of sharing birthdays was gone.

June 3rd, my niece Elizabeth was born.

Oh that is hard when you should be celerating your birthday your also feeling the loss of your mom. That is tough. I never thought of it that way before. My twin grandsons were born on my birthday...I sure hope it doesn't affect them that way when I pass.
I just got the call my dad just passed away....my sister drove all the way there and just missed his passing by 15 mins. I am kind of selfish in my thinking because I am glad that I was not there to see it and see just how bad he looked...apparently he looked like a corpse for days. That is not how I want to remember him. I had a super hard time when my grandmother and also my 4 yr old niece passed away and I was there...now when I think of them all I do is see them at their worst before they passed no matter how hard I try I can't lose that vision.
There will be no open coffin when this lady goes..just cremate me please!

QueenChatty wrote in post #15441825
...I am kind of selfish in my thinking because I am glad that I was not there to see it and see just how bad he looked... That is not how I want to remember him...

Not a bit of it. Not selfish at all.

Remember as you want to, that's what counts. No one can take away your memories from you.

D.

VSS2011 wrote in post #15445548
Not a bit of it. Not selfish at all.

Remember as you want to, that's what counts. No one can take away your memories from you.

D.

Thanks....No one would try to except his stupid wife that put a wedge between my dad and I over the last few yrs. At least I won't have to make nice with her any more. So many times I just wanted to lash out and tell her exactly what I think of her but didn't because I am bigger than that and it would only fall on deaf ears so no point.

QueenChatty wrote in post #15441825
Oh that is hard when you should be celerating your birthday your also feeling the loss of your mom. That is tough. I never thought of it that way before. My twin grandsons were born on my birthday...I sure hope it doesn't affect them that way when I pass.
I just got the call my dad just passed away....my sister drove all the way there and just missed his passing by 15 mins. I am kind of selfish in my thinking because I am glad that I was not there to see it and see just how bad he looked...apparently he looked like a corpse for days. That is not how I want to remember him. I had a super hard time when my grandmother and also my 4 yr old niece passed away and I was there...now when I think of them all I do is see them at their worst before they passed no matter how hard I try I can't lose that vision.
There will be no open coffin when this lady goes..just cremate me please!

I never thought about how hard birthdays would become. Didn't even realize it until my birthday was coming up. That first birthday was difficult, but I was lucky that everyone at work knew about it and worked to make it better. They kept me busy all day, and then decided that we needed to go out after work. A bunch of us went for dinner at a nearby sports bar. I then went to a friend's place for a movie night with the girls.

Distraction just seems to be the best way to deal with them. I don't take the day off work because I would just end up sitting around and thinking about things. This past birthday I had a "secret sister" send flowers to me at work. I still don't know who it was, but they sure were appreciated!!

I do greatly despise the memories I have of the end times. Incoherent and ill. Not the way she should be.

Sorry about your dad Chatty. Seems like you have your good memories well preserved.